Its been a while

Its been a while now, surely it can't be true. Clouds disappear and the weight that pushes down on my chest lifts letting me breathe once again. Surely it can't be true, somewhere in the shadow it hides, waiting. Though something else begins to seize me, choke me, drown me. I feel as if I have become numb and dull. forgetting things and feeling the creativity I held dearly to me fade away and I be left with nothing but a hollow shell. Is this what I must pay for it to go away even for a moment? For I know it still lurks, waiting.