Rain

Rain

A Poem by Queen Jummarrium

I love to watch the rain

it falls, falls to the earth in silence

shatters to the dirt

feeds the plants of many

fills the ocean, blue as the sky

creates a perfecrt day to cry

all the tears hidden from view

I walk through myself and back again

but I'm still not sure just who I am

I watch the rain just so I know

I'm not the only sorry soul

© 2009 Queen Jummarrium


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Featured Review

Beautifull work. I loved every word of it. "Falls to the earth in silence, shatters to the dirt." You describe exactly how a drop of rain looks when it hits a solid object. Shatters like glass. A very thoughtful observance. "Creates the perfect day to cry..all the tears hidden from view." If you need to cry that is the best time walking in the raining. You can even stop and chat with someone and they are none the wiser. The part I love the most is "I walk through myself and back again...but I'm still not sure just who I am." A lot of deep soul searching. You are a gifted writer. Keep the good work flowing!

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I love this. The imagery and the honesty of this piece is breath taking, very well done :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


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Posted 13 Years Ago


i. adore. this.
consequently, its raining today, and has been for three days, so i'm definitely feeling this rainy sort of sorrow you speak of.

Posted 15 Years Ago


Another "wow". I really enjoy your style and you are quickly becoming one of my favorites from this site. I disagree with Koufus, on one fact that the line is not an analogy but more of a metaphor; and also if it were to be changed, I think it would disrupt the flow of the poem. Simplicity is not always predictable.

Posted 15 Years Ago


It's a lovely poem which echoes a sadness though also a beauty of the way life is...the process of rain nourishing the earth. There is a soothing quality to your poem which makes it quite appealing.

Posted 15 Years Ago


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H
That's extraordinary!

It's got a great rhythm and flow.

But:

I see a minor typo there and I detest the line "blue as the sky".

I feel it makes the poem collapse upon itself because the analogy of the ocean being as blue as the sky is so predictable.




Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Beautifull work. I loved every word of it. "Falls to the earth in silence, shatters to the dirt." You describe exactly how a drop of rain looks when it hits a solid object. Shatters like glass. A very thoughtful observance. "Creates the perfect day to cry..all the tears hidden from view." If you need to cry that is the best time walking in the raining. You can even stop and chat with someone and they are none the wiser. The part I love the most is "I walk through myself and back again...but I'm still not sure just who I am." A lot of deep soul searching. You are a gifted writer. Keep the good work flowing!

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nice flow, great structure. you vocabulary is a bit limited but works for this piece.
one line seems very familiar and I think would be do good to be rewritten.
"I walk through myself and back again" I have seen in many poems.
Maybe something like "I walk through my soul, a weary traveler"


Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this was a great poem!
i love rain but this kind of shows the sad side to rain but still such a great piece and beautifully written!

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great poem! I also love the rain, I think its amazing, Keep up the good work!

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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23 Reviews
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Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on April 8, 2009
Last Updated on May 3, 2009

Author

Queen Jummarrium
Queen Jummarrium

nowhere in particular , No Man



About
*I am an Atheist* *I support gay marriage* *I'm going to be queen of the world, someday* *And i'm going to have a royal shoe tier too* *Simple Plan songs define my life* *I live in t.. more..

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