If i get love

If i get love
i shall sing
like a gentle dove

i shall walk and walk
at night
i shall fly
like a kite

If i get love
or if you love me
i shall swim at the sea

i shall be blue of the sky
you will see me at your eye

Reviews

[Baby Ricochet]

You can't buy love but you can buy sex

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx

[DrD]

Jubilation poetry is always fun to read and this is no exception. Well done.

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx

[KAOlmsted]

I hope you get love. This was nice.

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx

[s y e]

This was really good. Well done!

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx

[John Alexander McFadyen]

A lovely whimsical piece

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful poem. Had the flow and feel of joy for life and love. No better desire to hold close to. Thank you for the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx

[Aehr]

cute! I loved the description.

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx

[Icelanna]

I like the idea of the "what if" But the actions you describe aren't really connected to love. For example walking at night - how does that show that you have been given love and that you are possibly giving it back. I get the "flying" but, because when you are in love you feel high, on top of the world, nothing can bring you down etc. Also the swimming makes no sense to the thought of being in love - if you mean swiming on an emotional wave - that's different but you need to clarify it and go into detail to create emotive writing.
I would not say you would be "blue" Blue means sadness normally and you wouldn't be sad if you have been given love since this poem is about finding it. I would use yellow as the sun if you want a reference to the sky.
Don't for get your punctuation!
Love to you x

[Dupur Mitra]

thnx