And Grace

 

FADE IN:

INT: GRACIE’S BEDROOM - AFTERNOON

 

Gracie is modeling her new clothes in front of her mirror. She gives a few goofy, cliché model poses to entertain herself. Her phone rings. Throughout the phone call, she is still modeling, but is less involved in it, and not giving a cartoony performance to she was before.

 

GRACIE

(answering)

Hullloo....

      (>>>)

GRACIE (CONT)

(excited)

Oh hey!.... No, I just went shopping- got some new clothes.... Well the parental units kind of went, “Hey, buy your own birthday present!” and threw a credit card at me.... No, what are you f*****g kidding me?- It was awesome. I didn’t have to give that fake: “Heh-heh, I love it.” Like that time my dad got me those giant, f**k-off earrings....

      (laughing)

Yea, those ones. And they didn’t fit my head.... Oh they were too that bad. I looked like a f*****g disco ball whenever I turned and they caught the light. But them handing me the credit card, I can just go and get whatever I want.... Well, no, I have some sense. I’m just not going into the mall like,

      (quiet yelling)

“I’m getting whatever I want- f**k it!”....

      (normal)

Because I set a limit for myself... Because I’m a good daughter.... Oh, f**k you.... I got a bunch of stuff. (She goes on describing the clothes she’s just bought.)....

I’m not sure yet. I mean, I’ll end up bringing half of this stuff back anyway.... Refunds, idiot.... Yea, why not? I’m not below returning the clothes I just bought for some cash.... Because the store I bought them from gives cash refunds for credit purchases.

      (laughing)

I know, right? What f*****g idiots.... I don’t know, but they do.... Yea, so I buy clothes with my parents credit card, then return them like a week later for pocket money.... I don’t know, once or twice.

      (sudden realization)

Oh My God! The funniest thing happened while I was there- well, at least I thought it was funny. But a girl got busted for shoplifting. So f*****g funny.... I was on line and I see this girl wearing this baggy, f**k-off sweater walk in, and she grabs a couple of t-shirts and tops and whatever and goes back into the dressing room. So I move up a couple of people in the line, and completely forget about how weird I thought it was. Then all of a sudden the stores alarm goes off, really f*****g loud too. So everyone looks towards the door, and the girl with the baggy, f**k-off sweater is standing there like a deer in the headlights. And everyone’s looking at her; and she’s looking at everyone, then she just f*****g bolts. And the manager runs out from behind the counter yelling, “Security! Security!” Then I hear the dead-eyed, emo chick behind the register just go,

(flatly)

“Next!”....

(>>>)

 

 

GRACIE (CONT)

(laughing)

I know, completely apathetic, like it didn’t even f*****g happen. And I turn around, because I’m next, and she’s just there holding the scanner, with this blank look on her face like,

(flatly)

“I don’t care about anyone. I don’t care about anything. I just want to get the f**k out of this hellish store.”.... I went and gave her my s**t.... Because she looked like she wanted to kill someone and I didn’t want to end up in the paper tomorrow.

      (laughing)

Yea, “Teen Dies in Tragic Mall Fiasco, Two Wounded.”....

      (laughing)

Yea, so what’s up?

 

Her face falls, as she hears the terrible news that the party she has been helping to plan is being cancelled.

     

GRACIE (CONT)

      (shocked and angry)

What?!.... What are you f*****g kidding me?!.... And you didn’t think to interrupt during my stupid f*****g story about shoplifting, “Oh yea, Gracie, by the way, I thought you should know the party’s been cancelled- go on.” What the f**k?....

      (calming down)

Alright, alright, sorry, sorry.

      (a beat)

What happened?.... A pipe?....

      (annoyed)

A f*****g pipe? So let me get this straight, our indoor party just got rained the f**k out?.... F**k me.

 

She puts her head into her hand.

 

GRACIE (CONT)

      (hopelessly)

Well, is there any place else we could have it?....

 (annoyed)

No, f**k that. I already called Kurtzman. I haven’t even seen the guy yet, and already feel like I have an STD. And if I don’t go there to meet him to get all this beer, there goes our f*****g guy at the liquor store....  Because he’s a fickle prick. No, we’re having this party, because I’m going to have lots of beer, and nowhere to f*****g put it.... I don’t know. Call Jenny, and everyone we know to see if any has a free house....

      (sudden realization)

OH! CALL JESSICA HENNER!.... Because even if she doesn’t she has that guest house, and her parents could give a f**k. (>>>)

GRACIE (CONT)

Call Jessica Henner, then call me back.... Yea.... Alright, I’ll talk to you later.... Bye-bye.

 

She hangs up the phone, and throws it somewhere out of frame. She looks into the mirror again, and half-heartedly poses.

 

GRACIE (CONT)

      (exasperated)

If this doesn’t work I’m going to f*****g kill someone.

Author's Note

(>>>) This means there's a page break in the line.