And suddenly he left me

And suddenly he left me with many broken pieces of our love shattered around inside me. I am now just left with a broken heart that can never dare to love back,
broken promises that can never trust anyone,
eyes full of tears that will never stop flowing each time on hearing his name,
a confused mind that can't decide whether it should wait for him or forget him,
feelings and memories that can never be erased and have now grown into deep dark scars,
finally last but not the least my soul that screams loudly and denies residing back to support me ...

      

Reviews

[Jane Taylor Hardy]

Beautifully expresses emotions felt at the loss of love....very nicely inked...raw and real.

[Mitali Shah]

Thanks a ton Jane :)

[Chirag Kumar]

This one accurately describes the psych of a person when a loved one leaves her. Awesome didi :)

[Mitali Shah]

thank you Chirag :)

[Robert]

Once again a good piece. I know there are "rules" to poetry but there doesnt have to be. I can give you a list (I am sure you know already) of some of the greatest poets that went outside the rules of poetry. If it comes from the heart, and you express this so others may read, this is poetry. Look at Walt Whitman he was so far outside the rules of poetry and he is Americas best poet.

[Mitali Shah]

Thanks a lot Robert for your genuine appreciation and concerned thoughts :)

[Mayank]

This is more like a small piece, I wouldn't say this is poem. You can add few more intense sentences, perhaps the last line that should be more like punchline. Because, even heart break that saddened everyone result into the consequences unexpected. Good work.

[Mitali Shah]

Thanks Mayank will surely work harder ahead

[Mayank]

Hey! I just left message, check inbox, might help. Thank you!

[Mitali Shah]

thanks again Mayank

[613]

This is so beautiful. My only suggestion - the last sentence comes across a bit cliché & cheesy. Maybe tweak it a little?

Nice work!

- Brittney

[Mitali Shah]

Thanks Britney will surely work out harder ahead

[613]

Sure thing!

[Ashwin Thakur]

Its nice if u can have some rhymes to make it more creative

[Mitali Shah]

Yes Ashwin Thakur I am working on that too.. thanks fr reviewing will soon adapt new points in my upcoming writings

[Ashwin Thakur]

If u want help with rhymes u can read my poem

[Mitali Shah]

yea sure will surely work on it