swan song

I walked into the bar

all dark eyes and brooding

hating being first 

alone

in a room of couples

cocktails please

mix the separate parts

to become one

and fill my expanse

shaking off the cold

out of my jacket

my new top in the light

I turned away from the bar

and was stunned 

to be face to face 

with your twin

you sat at a table

draped over some man

our eyes locked

my stomach lurching and

jerked away from your smirk

all the while

I could feel your eyes

on my back

like a provocation

you’ll never get over me

defiant

I would not turn around

gingerly

I carried the drinks

to another table

positioning my chair

away from your direction

instead facing the door

all the time you

watching me

they eventually came

and we laughed

and sang

our cheeks rosy

and eyes glowing

in a table at the back

walking past you

stubborn face turned

your memory fading

later we went to leave

and I passed your corner

allowing myself to glance

finally

oh the luxury

but you were gone

the table empty

I smiled to myself

for the first time

I felt nothing

not caring if it was you

or just your ghost

these are your last lines

the trail has run cold

and I must say goodbye

my words are my own

and you deserve no more