Hap Meyers

Child Psychology

     As if the learning environment was not strange enough already, my parents were driving me to Boise to talk to this man named Hap. He was the individual making up all these prescriptions so I could be a zombie and he could make money. I think that this was where everyone went about the situation the wrong way.

     The reason I say this is because nobody told me the reason why we were talking to this man. In fact, my parents would talk to everyone else about my "issue" except for me. I was a problem child. I was bullied to the point I was cantankerous and I was the problem child.

     When we went to out appointment, I sat in a room full of toys by myself. I played with the wooden toys and painted while my parents spoke with Hap. After for what seemed like an eternity, Hap would enter the room and see what I am doing. We never really had any conversations. If we did, I do not remember.

     There was one day Hap came to my school. He sat in the room to observe my behavior. People did not explain the reason why.

     Eventually I quit seeing Hap. I never spoke with anyone else for that matter. Perhaps the health benefits were no longer covering anything and the appointments became too expensive. I'm glad it did stop. The secrecy, however never did end. I became more and more uncomfortable about seeing Hap or taking medication.

     I became uneasy when I understood why I was taking those pills. They were anti-depressants. They thought I was depressed. I became discouraged in the concept and with my parents. I became disappointed with the education system completely. I felt deceived.

     Even more so when my parents got a divorce. I became disrespectful because nobody was respecting me as a person. I began to mentally attack my father. I wanted him to shut-up. He went around telling everyone about things that were none of their business. This was similar to when he was telling me stories about my mother.

     He would tell any woman he was dating about my "medical condition." This annoyed me very much. Every time I confronted him about it, his rebuttal was that he needed someone to talk to about it. He couldn't talk to me about it instead of gossiping?

     Not only that, that is my personal medical information that he was broadcasting. It was my problem; not his. He may have been paying for it, but it does not justify blabbing it to everyone else. I was going through the treachery. I was the one taking the pills. I was the one being beat up at school by teachers and students. While I had to experience this, I was on the medication?

     My mother also spoke behind my back, but I never heard it from anyone she was dating. I get the feeling she spoke to other family members about my issue because there was a tape I found of my grandfather before he passed away. He was talking about me and my short temper. I was fuming even though he said that my parents had a short temper as well. I never spoke much to any of my relatives and I felt even more isolated because people were talking about me behind my back.

     I felt like a science project. This created a suspicion toward all doctors alike. I was challenged with trusting my own parents. This garbage with Hap Meyers created an obstacle for me to become an independent human being. I thought for myself and wanted to make my decisions.

     People thought that I could not think for myself. Everyone was still stuck on the assumption that I was disabled and in need of mental help. The only thing I needed mental help with was the result of nobody communicating with me.  Distrust in anyone and anything is easy to create, but virtually never goes away.