Prologue

There's a lot of things I didn't understand, a lot of things I didn't want to understand. The world was a cruel place that shut it's doors on anyone and anything different. My name's Frank, Frank Stahr. I've been sitting at this bar table for more than half the day, thinking about my poor excuse of a life. I've had what I believe is about a total of five beers, but to be completely honest I lost count after four. So here I am alone at the bar, totally intoxicated, and it's my twenty-first birthday. I guess wishes do come true. This was my first day out of college, well really I got kicked out, but it's all the same in the end to me. Supposedly it's frowned upon in college to party every night and to not go to classes, which I was surprised they didn't kick me out earlier. But I guess every college needs a partier. Every professor hated me and being bisexual didn't help my case either. I had many known names in that school and one of my favorites was man w***e. Never having a real relationships and having one night stands with guys and girls has that effect. It wasn't that I am a s**t and will do any gender I can find, I just can't choose. Every night I would have a different person in my dorm, and my roommates knew that I didn't like them at the dorm after six at night so they would go out partying, while I bring in that lucky person or two. Only once have my roommates walked in on me with a person and they got a huge surprise, me and the guy were on the couch and you can imagine what had happened there. So they didn't ever get back to the dorm until about eleven at night. So here I am alone, I haven't partied this whole day. I guess you are wondering what happened to me? What happened to all the partying? Well I'll tell you what happened. I grew up.

For you to know what happened. We’ll have to go to the beginning, the way beginning. The room darkened and lightning flashed. I always hate this part. The room started to spin as I grab a hold of my drink as tightly as possible. Brace yourself. The bar spun faster and faster, until all it was, was bright flashing lights. My head hit the table and I became unconscious. Don’t you worry I’m fine, you wanted to know. So here is the beginning. The room went black and a white light painted the walls. Screams were heard everywhere. I carefully walked down the hallway passing room after room. This place, this place is so familiar, so recognizable yet so different. The screams got louder and louder the farther I went. There was murmuring in one room and I entered through the door to see a women on the bed with doctors and nurses around her. 

“Sarah please you must push, push as hard as you can.” 

“Mrs. Stahr if you don’t push the baby will die, you can not stop now.”  

The doctors were hurrying around her, but she was no ordinary lady, she was my mom. Wait this is too far, I never wanted you guys to see my birth, I meant the beginning of my college years. Get me out of here. The lights went out and the rooms started spinning again. I dropped my beer. I dropped my beer! Faster and faster the rooms went, faster than ever. I think I’m going to be sick. I fell back into the bar stool toppling over onto the wood floor. When I didn't move right away, I started to hear voices. 

“Whoa, dude are you okay?” 

“He’s not moving.” 

“Is he dead?” 

“I think he’s dead!” 

I opened my eyes to see a group of people bustling around me, they all seemed to be looking for something. One guy stopped what he was doing and poked the person next to him. 

“Dude, dude. He’s awake!” Everyone turned to look at me. It seemed as if everyone was going through shock from a dead family member coming back to life. I looked around the room only to be disappointed. Come on, nothing changed. I’m still at the bar. The guy that saw me before knelt down by my head. 

“Are you okay?” I looked him up and down. He had raven black hair that covered his face, eyeliner around his eyes just smudged enough to look slightly messy. 

“I’m fine.” he kept staring at me almost like he didn't understand. 

“Dude, I said are you okay?” Now it was my turn to look dumbfounded, was this guy serious, I answered his question. 

“I said I’m fine, now leave me alone.” I started to glare at him, what more did he want from me, did he think this was a joke. 

 “Is this a joke to you? ‘Cause I’m not laughing.” I scoffed and shook my head. I looked up and saw him staring at me. 

 “Oh, You were serious. Man I’m sorry, I've been answering your questions. I thought you were joking with…” I stopped mid-sentence, he couldn't understand me? This must be a memory then. But he can see me? This is freaky. So if he couldn't hear me that means I must have been mind speaking. But this guy can see me, how does this work? I let out a shaky breath. 

 “You've done it now Frank.” I thought to myself as I ran my hands through my hair. 

 “I-I’m Frank.” Wow it was weird hearing my fruity voice. 

 “Well, hello Frank. I’m Kale. Now are you okay?” He grabbed my hand and helped me stand up. When I was up and sure I wasn't going to fall over again, I padded and brushed of the non-existing dirt and dust. 

 “I am fine. Thank you for helping me.” I started to walk over to the bar table. As I ordered a beer, Kale came over and sat in the stool next to me. 

 “Frank? Are you sure you are okay, you took a pretty hard fall there?” He looked at me and for a second I started believed that he actually cared for me. But that wasn't true no one cared for me, not even my own mother or father, who once I was born took off and left my mother to care for me herself. So here I am thinking all this through and Kale goes and places his hand on my knee. My eyes shot open and my head snapped down to look at his hand. He started to pull his hand off. 

  “Oh, I’m sorry I didn't mean…I mean if you’re homophobic I totally understand.” I chuckled as he kept on ranting. I grabbed his hand in mine. 

 “No, no I’m not a homophobe. I’m the complete opposite. I’m gay.” Kale’s face brightened once I finished those last few words and he started to rub his thumb in circles on the back of my hand. All of a sudden a realization dawned over me, this was a memory, but not of my early college years. This was what made me change who I was to who I am now, he turned my whole life upside down. Kale was a memory, we crossed paths a while ago but I haven’t heard or talked to him in close to a year now. It was stupid of me to let him go, he was one of the best things I ever had. Kale went into the Air Force a couple years after we started dating, he was gone for quite a while and one day someone came knocking on our door. It was Jared, a friend of his, that was in his uniform and a triangle folded American flag. In his left hand, he held a letter, how I wish I had never opened that letter. That day, was the worst day of my life. Jared stood tall and strong in my doorway. 

 “Frank?” I moved closer to him, trying to peer around him to see if anyone was behind him, hoping this was a joke that Kale was playing on me. 

 “Yes Jared?” I questioned him in an almost insulting tone. 

 “I’m here to give you this letter and flag,” he handed me each of the items and bowed his head. 

 “I’m so sorry for your loss!” I broke down crying after he said those words, I already knew what that letter was going to say and I didn't like it one bit. A little part of me still thought there was hope, still thought he was okay. I opened the letter and read the first paragraph: 

  Frank, We are sorry to say that your partner Kale, who has fought in a tremendous war and served our country, has recently passed away. He was a strong pilot and during this war was flying a plane over enemy territory and got shot down by enemy fire. We sent a search group out to look for him the first couple of days and he remained missing. A few days after the search a young soldier patrolling the lines found him by a log. We are sorry for your loss and we give you his tag and this American flag in his memory… 

I stopped reading the letter than and broke into a greater fit of tears. Kale was gone and worse than that we never got to get married before he left. They wouldn't let him. They had him choose the Air Force or me, and he was so excited to serve for our country, I was with him every step of the way. Our state wouldn't allow us to get married, our president didn't want us to get married, and people thought it was disgusting for us to get married. God how I hate our society. It was stupid, ignorant and only thought of its self. Why couldn't people be more open? Why can’t people have a change in heart? 

I guess that’s what happened shortened down, but for you to truly get how I feel you’ll need to know how I felt through this all. We’ll have to go to the beginning. The way beginning, as in my graduation. I quickly took a sip of my beer and set it down on a coaster, waiting a couple of seconds to think things over. I started to sway a little then blackness. My senior year was as normal as anyone else’s. If you think partying all the time and sleeping in classes is normal, but to me it was. Now I don’t even understand how I even graduated let alone get into a good college. I guess all that sucking up to my teachers really does pay off in the long run, that and getting a nerd to do your homework. I had my whole life set, I was going to go to the College of Arts in New York and major in illustrations then get a job drawing comics. It was all set, a fool proof plan. That is until college started.

I've never got why girls were fascinated with certain guys, me being one of the few guys that were always crowded by girls. I guess people just assumed that I liked all that, when in truth I could care less about the girls. I've never been interested in all the s***s crowding around all the time, with their really tight short skirts and low cut shirts that show their bras. College was even worse, a whole bunch of girls were getting into liking the rebel boys. My 5’7” stature, black dyed hair, lip ring, and tattoos were really taking a liking to. I thought that at college all my high school antics would evaporate and I would take things serious, but the alcohol and drugs didn't help anything either. I got into a lot of stuff in my college school and I was quite a rebel in school. Girls sure do love rebels and punks. I loved getting all that attention, all that love, even if it was fake. The first girl I got there was a stereotypical w***e with long blonde hair obviously dyed, huge b***s completely fake, skinny made by surgery, and claiming to be a virgin but there was not one ounce of her that was a virgin. I believe her name was Joy Williams and what a waste she was. She was so rude to everyone and I cannot believe we even lasted a week. Of course most of that week was just sex, which wasn't the best, and I hated every minute of it. I was rejoicing went we broke it off, which I did the breaking, then she exclaimed how she wanted a different guy anyway and how I was a drag to her life, always bringing her down. Anyways, my life was not dulled down by that in the next couple of days I met another girl.

 

Author's Note

what do you think of the whole story line, what would make it better (your opinion)