Fawn

Running around on the leaf covered ground.
Pattering hooves barely making a sound.
I was a fawn,
as small as can be
and in my forest I knew every tree.

In the distance, somewhere out there,
I knew was a huge scary powerful bear.
I was a fawn,
as small as can be.
And that bear was a lot bigger than me.

Here comes my rival, another small fawn.
He stops next to me. standing brave and tall.
Yet he was a fawn
and small just like me
and that bear was a lot bigger than we.

He said “what are you scared of you silly deer?”
I cried “don't do it! Get back here!”
Yet he was a fawn
and small just like me
and that bear was a lot bigger than he.

I followed him up to the caves mouth,
where I found a small bush to hide myself.
Yet he was a fawn,
much braver than me
and that bear was in there I was sure as can be!

He went in the cave, where the bear slept.
He was brave, so into the darkness he crept.
Yet he was fawn,
as small as can be
and that bear was a lot bigger than he.

Then he let out a bleat of utmost fear.
Which I prayed that the bear could not hear.
Yet he was a fawn,
as small as can be
and the bear was by far, bigger than he.

Deep in the cave I heard a roar.
The bear was awake! Of that I was sure!
But we were just fawns,
as small as can be
and we were no match for a bear like he!


A frightened bleat and my rival emerged,
scampering faster than most of our herd.
And he was a fawn,
as small as can be,
but he could run a lot faster than me.

Out the bear followed with raging, wild eyes
and away to the distance my rival flies.
I was a fawn,
as small as can be
and that bear was coming straight for me!

I turned and I ran as fast as I could,
but the bear was gaining, he only saw blood!
I was a fawn,
as small as can be,
and I was a meal for a bear like he!

I crossed a ravine on an old wooden tree.
I was surprised that tree even held me.
I was a fawn,
as small as can be,
and that bear was still coming straight for me!

The bear ran, roared, then gave a leap,
and fell down to where he'd forever sleep.
I was a fawn,
as small as can be,
and in my forest I knew every tree.

Author's Note

Let me know if the wording doesn't work and if there are any spelling mistakes etc.

Reviews

[Trigorin]

Not bad. Good use of imagery, and you've really captured the feeling of the fawn very well, I think. I think there are parts that are a little weak, but overall you've done well. Good work.