Milly's Journal - Chapter 10 - "A Night of Fun and Fairy Tales"

Milly and Geneva get in a little trouble one night.

Milly's Journal 












Chapter 10
"A Night of Fun and Fairy Tales

(Please remember to read the footnotes at the end of the chapter as it explains why I write some of the things I do.)

Dear Dad,

Well I don't know how to tell you this but...I have something to confess. I did something I shouldn't have done. I'm feeling very ashamed and a bit angry with myself. (I also know God is not happy with me either.) I feel absolutely terrible that I'm even having to tell you this, Dad. But I think if I go ahead and admit my mistake to you, it might help me feel better.

But first I need to start from the beginning.

When I last wrote to you, Mom was getting ready to leave for her dinner meeting, and I was waiting for Geneva to come back to keep me company while Mom was gone. It hadn't been too long after I finished your letter when Geneva got back. In fact, Mom met her just as she was going out the door to her car.

Geneva and I chatted for a few minutes until the pizza came. I was thankful it arrived fairly quickly after I'd called for the order since Geneva said she was starving as well.

We all ended up pretty much stuffing ourselves...with Louis of course grabbing most of the pieces. I warned him not to eat too much or he'd have a terrible stomachache later. But as I expected, he rolled his eyes at me and kept eating away.

After we finished the pizza, Geneva showed me a few of the movies she had brought with her. We were going to go and watch them right then, but I remembered we still had some of the laundry left to fold and put away. Geneva groaned loudly at me when I suggested we should go and get it done first. But I let her know that Mom would probably be a little disappointed if she came home and found all the clothes and such still laying around in the laundry room.

Geneva continued to complain, but she gave in when I added that with the two of us folding, it wouldn't take us very long to finish.

It was getting past time for Louis to go to bed, but he had parked himself right there in front of the TV once again, totally engrossed with playing his video games. Even Max was beside him getting into it by barking wildly at the screen and waving his paw in the air.

 

As Geneva and I walked past Louis to get to the laundry room, I hollered at him to finish the game, start getting ready for bed, and to make it quick. (I will admit, the real reason I wanted him out of the family room was so that Geneva and I could move in and claim the TV for ourselves.) Of course he responded by going, "Yeah...yeah...yeah!"... and kept on playing.

Anyway, when we were in the laundry room, Geneva began pleading with me to tell her everything that happened when I was in Eric's house that afternoon. I guess I wasn't too surprised she wanted to know. Because if she was the one that had gone inside, you'd bet the first thing I would do was to get her to tell me every single little detail that took place. From what I've learned, not many people have been inside Eric's house other than doctors and the people from the institution...oh and Mrs. Sherman too of course.

I knew without a doubt Geneva would never shut up and leave me alone about it until I told her. So I decided to go ahead and share the story of all my crazy experiences with her.

I started with how I stood beside Eric in the attic looking at the photo, and when he took my hand.

Dad, you should've seen Geneva's face when I told her that part! Her eyes got as big as saucers, and her mouth flew wide open! She looked so funny, I had to laugh at her reaction! But it kind of makes sense why she was so surprised. I myself never expected Eric to open up to me like he did, and Geneva claimed she has never known Eric to ever open up to anyone at all in his life.

For the next few minutes, both of us tried to figure out what made it happen. But with the few ideas we thought of, in the end we weren't able to come up with any answers.

But suddenly Geneva turned, looked directly at me with a serious expression on her face and said, "Well the only thing I can think of Milly, is there must be something very special about you that Eric is able to see in you."

Wow! I almost couldn't believe Geneva would say something like that to me. I wanted her to explain what she meant. Because honestly, there is nothing special about me at all. I'm just a normal person, like everyone else. If anything, I'm one of the most boring people on earth! And that's a fact!

However Geneva answered by saying, "I don't know. But whatever it is Eric sees in you, I sure wish I could see it too, because it must be something wonderful!"

Okay...I wasn't sure what to think of her response. But to hear it coming from a person like Geneva, it really made me feel a bit...unusual in a way.

We both were quiet for awhile. It was the same way when we became quiet when we were outside in the backyard earlier that day. Some things we just couldn't understand, and we tried so hard to figure out the answers to all of these unexplained mysteries that have been occuring lately.

As we continued to take care of the clothes, I suddenly heard the faint song of the windchimes begin to play again in the distance. I glanced toward the laundry room window and spotted Eric. He was, as usual, sitting on his windowsill and gazing up into the night sky with his arms outstretched, slowly rocking from side to side.

Then, as many times as before, I felt that oh so familiar leap of joy happen in me again. The kind of feeling you get that tells you something good may be going to happen. It's hard to explain, Dad, but it's just an amazing, happy, warm and peaceful feeling. These kinds of feelings keep coming from deep inside of me...but only at certain times.

All I want to know is, what on earth could these feelings be trying to tell me? I mean, I'm noticing they are occurring much more often now. There has to be a purpose, Dad. But what? Why can't I figure any of this out?

I was then brought back into reality when I suddenly realized Geneva was waving her hand frantically in front of my face and asking me if I was okay. I guess she thought I had gone into a trance or something since I had been off in my own thoughts. She of course wanted to know what I was thinking about. But for now, I really don't want to share with her about the unusual feelings that are happening to me just yet...at least until I can understand the meanings of these things myself first.

So...I gave her an answer by saying that I wasn't thinking about much of anything. --- Yeah, good answer, right? Ha ha!

Geneva shook her head and sighed. Yep, she knew good and well I had something interesting going on in my mind, and that I was going to keep it to myself.

Anyway, I figured the best way to change the subject was to tell her about how I met Eric's Uncle Hugo!

The same shocked expression covered her face when I told her I had actually talked to him. As I expected, her eyes again grew wide as she eagerly begged me to tell her everything -- what he said to me and what he did.

So I told her the whole story.

I mentioned how he acted as if he'd already been drinking quite a bit that afternoon, to which she nodded her head since she was already aware he was a heavy drinker. So that part didn't faze her at all.

I also brought up how he was laughing and making fun of me when I was afraid Eric would fall off the roof, and the way he seemed so convinced that there was no way Eric could ever fall and get hurt.

I kept telling Geneva how extremely weird I thought all of this was, along with her story about Dinky's BB-gun on top of the telephone pole. I was really curious to what she truthfully thought about all of these bizarre things going on lately.

Well...she still had no idea about the BB-gun, but the part about Eric not being able to fall...she kind of chuckled and said she thinks it's because with as much as Uncle Hugo drinks, he ends up doing enough "falling" for the both of them. And I guess she's right. It's not surprising how his excessive drinking could affect his mind till he's unable to think rationally. Seriously though, I don't ever want to find out what all else could be going on in that head of his. It scares me to even think about it.

I could tell Geneva was quickly getting bored with folding the laundry, (and I really couldn't blame her,) when she pushed the laundry basket aside, (that still had clothes left in it to be folded,) and announced with much authority, "Milly, come on! Let's just leave this crappy laundry and go have some fun before the night's over!"

And I 100% agreed with her! I was more than ready to go and spend some time goofing off with Geneva before it got late and Mom would get back home.

I couldn't hear Louis' video games going on anymore, so thankfully he had listened to me and had gone up to bed. So I excitedly suggested to Geneva that we go and see what's on TV and maybe watch one of the movies she had brought.

But...she disagreed. Apparently she had something much more exciting on her mind. With a sly look in her eyes, she grabbed me by the arm and hurriedly dragged me into the kitchen. Then with an evil grin she said, "Your Mom's not home! Let's have some REAL fun here!"

At first I had absolutely no clue at what her idea was that could be that much fun. But whatever it was, she sure was excited about it!

Next, she glanced around the kitchen and asked me if we had a blender. Although I was extremely confused, I went over and got out the blender for her.

Yes, I was quite a bit curious at what she was going to do, so I went ahead and asked her. Unfortunately she wouldn't tell me anything but, "You'll just have to wait and see."

Then before I knew it, she had made her way over to the kitchen cabinets and began opening them one by one. I followed right after her while anxiously asking her what the heck did she think she was doing? What was she looking for? -(1)

I seriously wanted to tell her to stop and to leave our cabinets alone. Because what she was doing was being way too nosy, let alone being extremely rude! Since she asked me for the blender, couldn't she have also asked me to get whatever else it was that she was looking for?

All of a sudden, I saw her eyes light up as she finally came across what she was searching for when she looked inside one of the cabinets....it was Mom's small stash of alcoholic drinks. Yes the drinks she had stored away and kept hidden, and to only be used during big celebrations you and Mom used to have.

Geneva reached up, grabbed several bottles and carried them to the counter.

Oh I tried my best to stop her, Dad. I told her there was no way we could use those tonight, and that they should be put back immediately and left alone! But she refused to listen to me. Nothing I said would convince her that this was a bad idea. So all I could do was stand back and let her go to work.

She started first by pouring a little bit of vodka into the blender. Next she asked me if we had any fruit around, mainly bananas and nectarines.

Now Dad, I was perfectly okay with her adding those kinds of things. So I went and found several of them -- and I grabbed a few strawberries as well.

My curiosity grew as I watched her throw in the fruit. I was desperately hoping that those would be the last ingredients she had planned to use for whatever this mystery drink was going to be. Sadly I discovered she was nowhere near finished when she asked me to hand her the bottle of rum.

Please believe me Dad, I didn't want to. But for some reason, there I was, willingly handing the bottle to her.

As she poured in about half of the liquid, I just stood and glared at her. But she didn't stop there. She picked up the bottle of vodka again and added more of it to the mixture.

It wasn't long before I couldn't take it anymore. I had to say something! So I asked her, a bit angrily I may add, if she had completely lost her mind! I got firm with her and explained that we just couldn't do something like this....and that if Mom found out, she would absolutely kill me, and maybe her too!

Geneva shook her head in disgust, rolled her eyes, and asked me to hand her the tanqueray. Clearly she didn't seem to care if we got in trouble or not. I kept telling her numerous times that I was not happy with this idea...AT ALL!!

I think I was finally starting to get on her nerves, because at one point, she actually stopped what she was doing to give me a stupid lecture on how childish she thought I was being, reminded me that I was fourteen-years-old and it was time for me to grow up and live.

Then she got face to face with me, put her hands on my shoulders, looked me directly in the eyes and said earnestly, "Come on, Milly! You deserve to have some fun once in awhile!"

Who was I kidding? I realized I was doing nothing but wasting my time trying to get through to her. So I sighed and made the decision that maybe, (and I stress the word "maybe") it would be okay to add more of the drinks...BUT ONLY if it was a very tiny amount. (Yea Dad, I'm afraid you already have an idea where this is going.)

The whole time we were in the kitchen, I had a huge knot in my stomach. And I knew something was stongly urging me to say "No!" Deep down I knew what we were doing was wrong. But I started pushing those thoughts aside, which now I've deeply regretted doing.

Geneva gladly took the bottle of tanqueray from my hands and started to pour.

After a few seconds, I grabbed on to the bottle trying to yank it out of her hands while almost screaming at her to stop! I strongly declared that she had put in more than enough!

And would you believe she just shoved me away and ended up pouring most all of what was in the bottle into the blender.

She knew how much this was worrying me, but she kept insisting that everything was going to be okay. I finally just threw my hands in the air and gave up. She clearly wasn't going to pay any attention to me.

I kept watching as she attached the lid and made the blender come to life. It was easy to tell she couldn't wait to start gulping it down. Me however, I had planned to only take a small sip or two and no more than that.

Although looking at it, it looked like nothing other than a delicious strawberry milkshake, which made me feel a little better about tasting it, even though I was still nervous about it.

After it was all mixed thoroughly, Geneva poured a very small amount of the drink into two glasses, handed one to me, and we made a toast...to Uncle Hugo.

With all the stuff Geneva put into it, I was seriously expecting it to taste really disgusting! But when I took a sip, it actually tasted pretty good. I was surprised! So...I drank a little more...until I had finished all that was in the glass.

Geneva smiled greedily, took one of the bottles and poured what was left of it into the blender. Then she handed the entire blender container to me while she snatched the bottle of vodka. She took a hold of my arm again while saying, "Come on! Now we're REALLY ready to enjoy some TV!," and pulled me into the family room.

Yeah Dad, I'm sure you are already cringing at my story so far. I'm also sure this story is making you anything but happy. I'm already feeling worse than terrible having to write you about all of this, but here I am, writing you everything!

Geneva and I sat down in front of the TV and got ready to enjoy an evening full of nothing but fun!

At first I set the blender container aside. I thought I'd better not drink anymore. Geneva however, was drinking straight from the bottle...which was every few minutes.

But before I realized what I was doing, I had picked up the container and was taking a few more sips.

Yea Dad, it's like when you tell yourself you'll do something just one more time, and you'll stop. But you start thinking, "Just one more won't hurt." So you do it again, and then again. Then after awhile you discover there is no way you can make yourself stop...until it's too late.

Anyway, before we started a movie, we first had found an interesting program on MTV. They were showing their Top-10 music videos of the week. So for the next hour, both Geneva and I watched videos...and...we continued to drink.
 















Very soon, I began to notice the effects the drinks were having on my body. But at the time, I didn't even care. It was actually making me have a very weird, but good feeling. I was kind of lightheaded, but at the same time, it was as if I didn't have any worries about anything at all. I felt like I loved every single person in the whole entire world!

Then after a few more minutes, everything began to seem so funny...and for no reason. For example, Geneva and I would burst out in giggles anytime someone came on the TV screen. We'd also sing along (while being extremely loud and very off tune) to most all of the music videos being shown.

I know, I know Dad! Although I felt that I was having the best night of my life, now that the drinks have worn off and I feel that I'm back to normal again, I fully understand I made a very bad decision to give in to Geneva's plan last night. But there's a lot more I want to tell you about. Yes...unfortunately this story isn't over yet.

A little while later, I started to get a bit woozy. I glanced over at Geneva to see if she could be feeling the same way. But she was acting just as normal as could be. In fact, she continued drinking the bottle of vodka she still had in her hand until it was almost completely gone.

Thinking it would help me feel more comfortable, I pulled myself up onto the couch so I could stretch out easier and relax.

For a few minutes, my head was really spinning like crazy, so I closed my eyes for awhile until the dizziness passed.

By that time, I was getting awfully tired of watching music videos. So without saying anything to Geneva, I grabbed the remote control and changed the channel. The picture changed to what looked like a very old, but romantic movie.

Perfect!!

However Geneva sure didn't agree with me. In fact, she immediately demanded me to change the channel. Hmm....I guess love stories aren't her kind of thing. But I was not about to change the channel back to MTV. I was totally in the mood to watch something romantic! And this movie was nothing but romantic!

The scene was showing a man and a woman who were on a couch, passionately kissing one another as a series of dazzling fireworks brightly exploded outside a window behind them.

When Geneva figured out that I wasn't going to obey her request to change the channel, she gave me a look of pure evil, as if I was the most insane person on the planet! But I wasn't going to let her bother me anymore. I even hid the remote under the pillow I was laying on just in case she tried to steal it from me.

I then made myself as comfortable as I could, and I was ready to soak in an enchanting love story.

But sadly I wasn't able to find out what happened with the kissing couple, or even how the movie ended because I started to get pretty sick to my stomach, and it was getting very difficult to keep my eyes open.

My head was spinning again, but this time, it wouldn't stop. I tried laying my head down on the couch, hoping it would help me feel better. But instead, everything just kept getting worse. I couldn't even make myself think straight!

Then...I can't remember anything that happened after that. It all became a blur.

I don't know how much time had gone by, but when I finally managed to open my eyes, there was Mom...standing over me with a look of absolute horror on her face! I didn't even hear her come in! I had fallen asleep, and for who knows how long!

I looked around to see if Geneva was still here. I saw her standing at the other side of the family room gathering her things, getting ready to leave. She was looking at me with a panicked expression, as if she was silently saying to me..."We're busted!!"

I wasn't sure if Mom said anything to me or to Geneva, but I do remember her helping me up off the couch.

Oh it was so embarrassing to have Mom see me this way! I could barely stand on my own two feet, and I still had trouble keeping my eyes open. Seriously, I felt like I was dying!

I used the little bit of energy I had left to hold on to Mom as I desperately tried to regain my balance. We went very slowly up the stairs, and she helped guide me over to my bed.

I know Mom was so mad at me last night....no, she was FURIOUS!! I even asked her if she was mad at me. My head was in a fog, but I *think* she answered saying that she wasn't mad at me right then, but she would be mad at me in the morning when I was sober. But I knew without a doubt she was more than angry with me from the second she found me all sprawled out on the couch.

All that was important to me at the time was that I wanted to go to bed...and stay in bed....for the rest of my life!!

The last thing I remember after that was passing out as I dropped like a rag doll into bed. I don't know if Mom stayed to talk to me about anything else, because the second my head hit the pillow, I was totally "out" for the rest of the night.

It seemed hardly any time had gone by when all of a sudden, it was as if I was going through a tremendous earthquake when my entire bed had begun shaking like crazy! What was going on? It started to scare me. But as I became fully awake, I discovered that the shaking going on was actually Mom, shaking me to wake me up for school.

And Dad...I wasn't feeling any better. Truthfully I felt fifty times worse! My head was pounding with the most excruciating headache I think I've ever had in my whole life, and my stomach felt even worse than it did last night! I was afraid I was going to throw up any minute.

There was no way I was going to school feeling that bad! I tried so hard to convince Mom I was sick and that I really needed to stay home. But nope! She wouldn't hear of it! She told me she was sorry, and that it was my fault I had gotten myself into this mess, and I was going to go on to school no matter what.

Yes Dad, I begged and pleaded with her to please let me stay home in bed for just this one day. I even promised I would make it up to her somehow.

But no. She refused and ordered me to be out of bed in five-minutes.

As much as I hate to admit it, I think she was right. And I do know if you were here, Dad, you would've said the exact same thing to me and sent me straight to school!

I have no idea how, but I miraculously made it out of bed. With my head pounding as severely as it was, the bright morning sun shining through my windows made the pain more like torture! All I could think about was how I wish I could've gone back in time to last night so I could totally decline drinking that stupid crap Geneva made! I knew I had made a huge mistake. And this morning I was having to pay for it!

As I was starting to get ready for school, Louis walked up to my bedroom door, stopped....and just stared. His eyes were wide open with shock! To him I must have looked like an ugly beast on the verge of death! I know I sure felt like one!

Even Max started to walk into my room to come over and greet me as he sometimes does in the mornings. Today though, he got halfway in, took one good look at me, then turned and ran to Louis for comfort. Yes I was that bad off till even a dog didn't want to get close to me.

I was getting very annoyed with the way Louis was just standing there gawking at me for so long, till I finally spoke up and told him that he'd seen enough, and to get the heck out of here! I'm glad I did because the next thing I knew, he and Max were gone.

With the day already going as horribly as this one was, I dreaded to find out what the rest of the day was going to be like.

Sitting at the breakfast table, although I tried, I just couldn't make myself eat anything. Even the smell of food made me feel like I was going to throw up every few minutes. Louis was sitting across the table from me staring at me again, but I ignored him.

Not long after I sat down, Mom came over to the table and sat in the chair beside me. I knew she was about to give me a big lecture about how wrong it was of me to be drinking at my age, that I should've known better...etc. And what do ya know? I was right!

She began first by saying how very disappointed she was in me, and that she never thought I would ever do something like this.

Since the sunlight was still making my head hurt worse, every now and then I would have to cover my eyes with both of my hands. But I nodded my head to let her know that I heard her, and I understood what she was saying.

Well, she went on scolding me for awhile, and she even raised her voice at times saying how bad and dangerous drinking was, and that this is the first time she's ever been this angry with me.

Sometimes I could hear Louis just giggling away. Apparently, him getting to see me being yelled at was really hilarious to him.

But then it began to hit me that with all of the emotional trauma we've been going through with your death and the move and such, knowing I was guilty of adding an extra weight onto Mom's shoulders was causing her nothing but more pain and heartache. I was so upset because it was making her worry about me. Instead of moving forward like we all had begun to do, this horrible mistake I had made caused us to take a step backward. I was already regretting it all, but as I sat there, I had become so angry with myself, and also ashamed that I let it happen.

Mom asked me why I did it...and I couldn't answer her. I thought back to last night, before I took my first drink, and how I thought I had sensed something deep inside of me scream, "NO!" I should have paid attention to that feeling. I wished so badly I had told Geneva "No" and stood on my word. But I just pushed it aside and did it anyway.

I was so miserable, I was about to cry as Mom continued to fuss at me for a few minutes more. But I knew that it was too late, and there was nothing I could do about it. All I knew was that I never...ever wanted to drink...ever again!

Mom looked at the clock and announced it was getting late and that we would talk more about this later. I was relieved our little chat was over for the moment but oh how I dreaded facing the school day today. How was I going to make it through as sick as I was? What would the rest of the kids think when they saw me?

I wished to everything for a huge snowstorm to come so they would have to close the schools, and I wouldn't have to go. But there was no chance it could ever happen since it was about sixty-five degrees outside. Darn!

As I took my breakfast plate to the counter, (still filled with the food I hadn't touched,) I heard a knock on our front door. I had no idea who would be stopping by that early in the morning. Especially right before school when we were all about to head out the door.

I dragged my aching body over to answer it, and I was a bit surprised when I opened the door to see Geneva standing there. And the first thing she said to me was, "Woah Milly, are you okay?"

I thought that was such a ridiculous thing to ask. Just by looking at me she shouldn't have even had to ask that question.

However, I wasn't too surprised when the next thing she said to me was, "You look like death!"

I responded by saying that death was exactly the way I was feeling this morning. I also let her know how furious Mom was with me and that unfortunately she was making me go on to school.

Geneva then admitted that was the reason she was here. She asked if she could talk to Mom and me for a moment.

I remembered how it was getting quite late, Mom was just about to leave for work, and Louis and I were also getting ready to start out to school. But she insisted, saying it would only take a minute or two. She also stressed about how it was very important that she needed to speak to both of us.

Since she seemed so persistent, I let Geneva come inside. I went and got Mom, and the three of us gathered in the family room.

At first, I wasn't sure what she had in mind to say to us, so I was pleasantly surprised when she took the next few minutes to apologize to Mom, and also to me. She said she had been feeling really terrible about everything all night, and she especially felt bad that she had coaxed me into drinking when I hadn't done anything like that before. She seemed very sincere with her apologies, and she promised it would never happen again.

Now Dad, I don't know if it was because it was late and getting past time for her to be going to work, or if she honestly believed Geneva meant what she said. But she did accept her apology with no problem and told Geneva she was glad she took the time to come over to explain everything and tell us both she was sorry.

A look of relief came over Geneva's face when Mom responded nicely to her, so hopefully all of this is now over and will soon be quickly forgotten. Most importantly, I was needing this agonizing headache and the crappy way I was feeling to go away so that I could forget about that also.

Mom stood up saying that she really had to get going because she was already a few minutes late. She told me to go and get Louis so we could start on our way to school as well.

As Mom walked to the door, she turned and let Geneva know she appreciated her honesty and thanked her for stopping by. She also looked at me and added that she's still very disappointed in me and probably will be for a very long time now. But on a positive note, she also trusts us, and believes we will know better in the choices we make in the future. She even laughed a little when the last thing she said to us before she went out the door was, "You don't want to end up like Uncle Hugo over there, do you?"

And boy did I ever agree with that! I think Geneva did too!

After Mom left, I shouted at Louis to hurry up and get his things because it was almost time for us to head out the door or we'd be late for school for the second time.

Still, as sick as I was, it was so tempting to go upstairs, climb back into bed, pull the covers over my head and hide for the rest of the day. But I knew more than likely Mom would find out, which would only make her get very angry with me again if I did. So I decided I'd better go on to school.

I walked Geneva to the door. As she went out onto the porch, she turned to look at me again and just had to remind me how utterly repulsive I looked. I assured her that she had no need to tell me that because I was fully aware that I was looking as horrible as she thought I looked, maybe even worse.

However I couldn't understand why Geneva seemed to be okay. She wasn't acting like she was feeling sick or anything...she actually looked...normal. So I had to ask her about it. Because with the amount I saw her drinking last night, I thought she'd be a lot worse off than I was.

All she could answer was that she was feeling kind of woozy, but other than that, she felt fine.

I don't know, maybe she's gotten more used to drinking than I have, especially since last night was the first time I had ever tried an alcoholic drink.

I think Geneva really must have been feeling pretty guilty for getting me into trouble, because she began to earnestly apologize to me again. I told her to just forget about it all for now because I had made up my mind that I was never going to drink anything like that anytime soon!

I yelled back into the house for Louis to get a move on. I had no idea what he was doing for so long, but I warned him if he wasn't ready to leave in about ten-minutes, I would have to go and drag him out!

As I waited on the porch with Geneva, I was suddenly overwhelmed with total amazement when she asked me one of the most astounding questions I think I've ever heard her ask me...

"Milly, are you really in love with Eric?"

WHAT????

Dad I know I was still pretty woozy, and it had been hard for me to think clearly at times all morning, but had I heard her correctly? Maybe since I was so out of it, I was hearing things. So I asked her to repeat the question. Because I didn't believe for a second she would ever ask me such an absurd and foolish question like that!

Shockingly...she repeated the same question, the very question I thought I had just heard... "Was I really in love with Eric?"

I put my hand on my head since it had started spinning violently once again.

When the dizziness slowed down a little, I just had to ask Geneva what on earth would make her think I was in love with Eric? Was she insane? I think those drinks DID have an effect on her after all.

Then..she started laughing at me, Dad! And she was laughing hard! I don't know why she thought it was so funny. It sure didn't make me laugh.

When she finally calmed down enough to talk to me, she asked with a shocking tone in her voice, "You mean you don't remember?"

Remember? Remember WHAT???

I told Geneva I had absolutely no idea of what she was talking about. Seriously...I was completely dumbfounded at her reaction, wondering what the heck she thought was so funny. And what was it I couldn't remember?

She tried to refresh my memory by reminding me how we were in the family room watching a movie on TV. Now I did recall watching parts of some sort of romantic love story movie...I remembered the movie had fireworks, a man and lady were falling over on a couch during a long, passionate kiss....and that's about it. I had no memory at all of what went on after that...none!!! I could only remember waking up on the couch to see Mom hovering over me with a huge frown on her face.

All I could figure out about what Geneva meant was that I must have been talking totally out of my head, or I had passed out but continued to talk (like how some people will talk in their sleep,) or something like that.

Well, even though I was beginning to change my mind and not want to know, Geneva filled me in on everything.

First she was telling me that in the middle of the movie, I had started talking nonstop about Eric, and I would point to the people in the movie during the love scenes and say how awesome it would be if those actors were really Eric and me. And from then on, that was all I would talk about....me and Eric....in love with each other!

Yes Dad, I couldn't believe it! I don't recall saying any of those things...AT ALL!!

To be honest with you Dad, I do care about Eric, very much. And I guess you could say that I DO love him, but ONLY in the way a friend would love someone. The kind of love God wants us to have for each other. But I am not, and I am sure I will never be "in love" with Eric the way Geneva was insinuating.

Geneva continued on about how I kept asking her if she agreed with my opinion that if Eric wasn't the way he is, would she think he's handsome?

This was getting to be way too much for me. I tried to get Geneva to stop with all of this stupid nonsense, and that there was no way I would say or even think those things. But she swore to everything that it was true, and that I definitely said every single word.

I just shook my head in disbelief. None of what Geneva was saying made any sense!

But get this, Dad! Geneva also told me that I actually got really mad at her when she said she thinks Eric would be okay..."if he didn't have the brains of a goldfish!" She said we even argued back and forth about it for awhile. Still, no matter how hard I try to force my mind to remember, I have no recollection of any of it whatsoever!

I tried to explain to Geneva that I must have really, and I mean REALLY been out of it, because not one thing she swears I said will come back to me.

But then she shared her true feelings with me about how she was seriously hoping that I wasn't being truthful about Eric. Because in her words, "You can't be in love with a retard...it's just not done!"

Personally, I didn't really like how she used the word "retard," though. But as much as I hate to say it, I kind of agree with her comment. I mean, what kind of love relationship could I ever have with Eric anyway? In my opinion, for that kind of relationship to work, both people need to have something in common. And as far as I know, (except for a loss in the family,) Eric and I have absolutely NOTHING in common! Zero, zip, nada!!

And he's so different from a normal person. Since he never talks, and when all he does is sit on his windowsill most of the time, it just couldn't happen. I could never develop those kinds of feelings for him. Also, in that type of relationship, both people should enjoy being together and doing things together...and Eric...he does almost nothing. So I can understand what Geneva was getting at with her comment.

Therefore, I only consider Eric as a friend, and only a friend,...if he's even that...and nothing more. Actually, now that I think about it, I'm not sure he and I are really "friends" at all.

So why Geneva told me I was saying all of those stupid things about him, I'll never know.

Nevertheless, I couldn't help but make jokes about it with her, so I was actually laughing when I decided to ask her if I happened to say anything else ridiculous about Eric. Surely I didn't get any worse than what I already supposedly said, right?

Geneva just grinned from ear to ear and exclaimed, "Oh but you DID!!!" while adding that the last thing I said about him was the best!

Of course I dreaded to hear this wild story she was going to embarrass me with next. I groaned loudly, but gave her permission to go ahead and tell me the rest.

So for the next minute or two, Geneva told me this bizarre story about how I had this crazy idea that maybe Eric was actually fooling everyone, and in reality, he's just a normal teenager.

But the worst part was when she told me how I came up with this insane theory that sounded more like a fairy tale you'd see in a Disney movie.

Her claim was that I had started babbling on about how I thought it was possible that a bad witch had come and put an evil spell on Eric. This witch used her magic to steal his voice so he could no longer speak, as well as she took away all the happiness he had in him. And that would explain why he always looks so sad all of the time and acts like he's off in his own world.

But THEN....(I know you'll get a big kick out of this one, Dad!)...Geneva said I went on excitedly saying that I believed all Eric needed to be freed from the witch's spell, was to receive a kiss from a young maiden. And this very kiss would turn him back into a prince!!

Dad, Geneva was driving me absolutely bonkers with all of this stuff she was making up! I was almost ready to scream! So I went right out and told her I seriously thought she was losing it, that I had enough of these idiotic jokes, and to stop making all these foolish stories up! I did NOT say any of those things! Especially the last part about the maiden and the prince! Grrrr!!!!

But when Geneva saw I was getting very upset with her, she burst into another huge fit of laughter and confessed to me that she thought my fairy tale was very "beautiful," and I would make such a delightful "young maiden." She even said I wouldn't stop going on about how I so badly wanted to be the maiden that got to kiss Eric and rescue him from the witch's evil powers!

Finally, I got very serious with her and ordered her to please stop with the lies, and that she was getting way out of hand! I also made sure to tell her I didn't think any of it was funny...at all!

But she still swore to everything that she wasn't lying about any of it. Still, I completely refused to believe her. - (2)

Anyway, the only way I could get Geneva to stop bugging me about it was to stress to her that it was very late, and I really needed to get started on my way to school. Thankfully she agreed, and said she too needed to get going since her school was about to start in a few minutes as well.

She started to leave, but then she stopped, turned around and walked back up to me while reaching for something in her purse. She pulled out a pair of sunglasses and handed them to me saying I should wear them until I felt better. She said they've helped her, but she herself didn't need them this morning. So she figured I could make use of them instead.

Actually, I was very grateful to get them because most everywhere the sun shone, or any kind of bright light still made my head pound much worse, as if someone was trying to get into my brain using a jackhammer. So I was very willing to accept anything that might help in any way.

I thanked Geneva and we said our good-byes. I watched as she hurriedly jogged down the sidewalk and disappeared around the corner.

I once again shouted as loud as I could at Louis to quit stalling, and that we needed to get going right that very minute! I was quite relieved when he actually heard me this time and came bounding down the stairs, with his bookbag over his shoulder.

Max happily followed him out onto the porch, eagerly anticipating the chance to go along with us. But we put him back inside, told him to "stay" and quickly closed the door on him. I know he despises being left at home alone all day long, but what else could we do?

Still dreading this long day ahead of me, I took a deep breath, and Louis and I started out on our usual walk to school.

And Dad, I'm sorry to say this letter will have to come to an end for the moment. I just looked at the clock and it's almost 6:30! I should've been down in the kitchen getting dinner ready an hour ago! And with Mom due to come home from work in a few minutes, I'd hate it if she had to wait till much later than we usually do to get to eat.

So I'd better get busy! I need to go see what Louis has been up to anyway, so I'm going to go for awhile.

Something else very interesting happened at school today that I can't wait to tell you about! (No it doesn't have to do with anything about Geneva or last night, thankfully.)

But I'll write you again just as soon as I get a chance, okay Daddy?
I love you!! Soooo much!! Thank you for being YOU!! --

Milly

FOOTNOTES BY LYNN MCFALL:

(1) The movie does not show Geneva snooping around in the cabinets while she and Milly were in the kitchen. But since earlier in the movie, it DID show her doing things like, letting herself in the house, snooping around in their groceries, snatching a can of Coke without asking and possibly taking what looked like a yogurt cup, I thought I could have Geneva rudely looking through all of the Michaelson's cabinets, and helping herself to do whatever she wants. When I wrote that part, it just seemed to me what Geneva might really do when they got into the kitchen. So that's how I got the idea to write that part.

(2) I just have to make a note to everyone reading this who have never seen the movie, that Milly DID in fact say everything Geneva claimed she did. If you have seen the movie, you'll definitely remember the scene. It's a favorite scene among many "The Boy Who Could Fly" fans. But I decided since I'm having Milly's point of view told in letter form, that it would be very possible she wouldn't really be able to remember everything she said while she was drunk. I couldn't think of a way to write it as a letter if she *was* somehow able to remember...it would just sound a bit odd. So I thought changing that scene around a little would make it seem more likely how Milly would write about it. And I have to admit, it was a LOT of fun having Milly totally deny and refuse to believe she said all of those things about Eric, and not even want to consider she could ever fall in love with him. It just seemed impossible to her with Eric's condition and his personality. And also, it helped me to be able to write a way that Geneva could come over to the house to personally apologize to both Milly and her Mom. The movie doesn't really show the consequences Milly possibly could of had with her Mom with getting drunk. (ie getting punished etc.) So I felt having Milly feel extremely guilty of what she did and have her realize she made a mistake and is ashamed and angry with herself, I just thought it was a good way to deal with a situation like this....also mainly because Milly's character is so young...fourteen-years-old. So! If you are fan of this movie and are wondering why I changed this scene around like I did, this is why. :0)

And one other note....you might notice I ended this chapter kind of abruptly. I had originally had this chapter and chapter 11 as only one chapter. But it was getting WAY to long to be just one chapter. (If you are wondering, it ended up being a little over 60 notebook pages long.) So I decided to split it and make it into chapters 10 and 11. I also had to come up with a way to end this chapter the best way I could. I had to think of a reason Milly would have to stop writing for awhile. So I thought having her needing to go and fix dinner would work okay to make a somewhat decent ending to this chapter. It wasn't easy, but that's all I could come up with. It might be kind of lame, but I just couldn't think of anything else. And it's very possible I might have to do something similar to this in future chapters.

If you want to get in contact with me for anything, E-mail Me: [email protected]


  

Author's Note

I had a lot of fun writing this part. Even though I had to change the original scene that was in the movie, I think it turned out ok. I hope some find this chapter a lot of fun to read and I hope it gives you a laugh!