The Undead

 Barely holding it together,
I want to let it out.
I want to SCREAM!
Too afraid to lose control,
afraid of the consequences.
It begs and pleads
"Let me out, I want to live."
Do I dare breathe life into this monster?
I know the damage it is capable of.
I've seen it before.
Thought it was conquered,
thought it was dead.
Yet it here it remains,
a soulless creature,
hibernating
biding it's time
searching for a sign of weakness.
I must remain strong,
I cannot lose control.
Refusing to let it out,
this monster eats my soul,
devours my heart, 
consumes my mind.
Gladly do I take this pain 
to keep it contained.
Pushing out, breaking at the seams.
We both know it's only a matter of time.
The monster will break free
wreaking havoc
destroying lives
breaking homes.
A necessary destruction.
Do I dare release the beast?
The monster's life is tied to mine.
My soul is barely surviving
my heart weakly beating
my mind always racing.
One day I will be free
of the monster
of the pain
of the fear.
The deep rumbling grows
louder
Louder
LOuder
LOUder
LOUDer
LOUDEr
LOUDER
LOUDER!
It rips, tears, shreds,
destroying me inside out.
Dying to be alive,
pleading for a chance.
Do I dare give in?
Will I come out on top?
Can I survive a second attack?
Should I put others through my misery?
I cannot bear to see their pain,
a necessary destruction for me
to survive
to thrive
to heal
to forgive
to transcend.
Do I dare?
I must remain strong.