Libra, I'm Home.

A guys perspective from my lonely vibes and domes.

So we’re sitting on our first date, thinking how it can already be going so great.

Amazed at how I’m sitting here with you, sharing our first plate. 

I see she’s hurting inside, am I too late?

I’m trying to read her mind, I’m trying to concentrate. 

Is this fate? Or should I just let time pass and wait?

I’ve been hurt before so I already have some weight.

I ask more about her, I ask her for her birth date. 

She’s a Libra; Yeah, I think I found my soul mate. 

My hands are getting cold and numb, they’re getting hard to locate.

My heart is beating fast; I think I need to hydrate.

My heart is high on love, it’s higher than its normal heart rate. 

I feel dizzy, I look down at my own plate.

I see myself, what an awkward stage.

Boney face bony body, I just suffocate.

My mind playing games with me, I know I’m stressing but I should’ve ate.

Palms getting sweaty, I’m losing my water weight. 

Myself is what I need to isolate so I can find something in life to dedicate. 

I tell her I need to leave and that my ride is actually late.

She says,”okay, I’ll be waiting. Don’t forget about me, you’re profile ill update.”

Walking out the door my mind is racing. Thanks for the date, it was fascinating. 

Sitting in the car I’m contemplating, how I grew to be so cold without even hating. 

My mind is calculating, my emotions duplicating. 

So devastated, can’t even think of words I’m just hesitating. 

Every bad thought I’m dominating, every bad vibe and energy I’m isolating.

The universe will do its own thing on designating, so I’ll focus on myself while I’m operating. 

Reviews

[AE]

This made me smile, definitely sounds like a rap and it's cool. There are some sentences that can be rewritten to make more sense like, "Myself is what I need to isolate so I can find something in life to dedicate." I feel like there's something missing. Besides that, I just really wanted you to make more of an emotional connection. Maybe instead of just stating what he feels, use metaphors, or similes, or allusions to coax the reader into feeling the things he feels and create a general mood. This is good though, fun read!

[Jerryyoung1z]

This is good. Mad rhymes you've got. Sounds like a rap. Beautiful piece. Keep it up.

[Michelle May]

thank you!

[Jerryyoung1z]

You're welcome