Harry and Severus Snape: The final meeting

The closure we never had

Harry slowly awoke. He wasn’t quite sure where he was, but there was an immediate sharp pain throbbing in his head beneath his scar. Everything was white. Slowly standing up while holding his hand to his head, Harry looked left and right. There was absolutely nothing in sight, Except for a distant gleaming white bench. Now that he thought about it, the whole place looked incredibly familiar.

“Kings Cross Station.” Harry mumbled softly. He remembered that day. It was the day when he met Dumbledore at Kings Cross. The day Voldemort had killed him. It has been exactly one week since that unforgettable day. And Harry had done everything in his power to try and forget it. This time was much the same, except for the absence of professor Dumbledore. Straining his eyes to see, Harry looked once more. Nothing. He felt a slight pinch of disappointment. He would have enjoyed a short chat with the wise old man. Suddenly, interrupting him from his thoughts. Harry’s attention was brought to an emerging black cloud coming at a considerable pace from the end of the station. Harry immediately brought his hand to his head again. A sharp pain throbbed against his forehead. It was at that moment that a voice found its way through the cloud.

“Interesting” The voice said. “At the pinnacle of death and you still come strutting into the afterlife”.

Harry recognized the voice at once.

The dark clouds parted and from the center a tall figure dressed all in black walked through. It was Snape. He stood there as threatening and as valiant as ever. His ebony black locks were still greasy and chin length. However, his skin looked even paler than it had before. Staring at his face , Harry noticed an immediate change. No longer was there a certain coldness or regret in Snape’s eyes. There seemed to be a hint of relief actually. He stood there tall, but not tired in the least as he had looked before. His cape was moving gently around his feet. His wounds had disappeared and there were no scars to be seen.

“Well?” Snape began. “No questions Potter, nothing in that miraculous mind to ask me?”

Harry stood astonished. He had so many questions following Voldemort’s death, questions that took up all available space in his mind. Although for some strangely odd reason he could not think of one. All he could even feel was the tug of deep shame and remorse in his stomach. 

“I...” Harry stuttered.

“Well do speak up Potter; I did not come just to waste my time trying to decipher your meaningless words." Snape sneered. His pretentiousness did not bother Harry in the least. He had no urge to snap back.

“I... I just don’t fully understand sir."  Harry said holding his head. “Why did you keep it hidden for so long” “Why didn’t you tell me”?

Snape starred at Harry then turned his attention to the sky. He looked back down at Harry. For the first time in his life, Snape looked like he did not know what to say. For once in his life, he was uncertain. He opened his mouth and said. “Knowing you were not as mighty as you were cracked up to be Potter , I could not inform you of my particular complex situation because your vulnerable mind would have fallen victim to a certain you know who. I was well aware he could penetrate your mind long before Dumbledore himself knew. I could not risk letting the dark lord find out. It would have resulted not only in my immediate death, but also in yours”. There a hint of relief in Snape’s movements that showed he had waited years to let his secret out to someone else other than professor Dumbledore.

“Why did you treat me… the way you did." Harry asked suddenly. The question surprised Harry and it was clear it caught Snape off guard as well. He stood there somewhat shaken. His face scrunched together and Harry quickly regretted asking it.

“You are at the height of death and yet your arrogance still remains a part of you” Snape muttered dryly. “Having been tormented incessantly by your swine of a father for no apparent reason was not something I forgot easily Potter”. Snape eyes were like daggers looking into Harry’s soul. However, his irritation settled quickly , and he was looking at the ground. Perhaps it was because Snape realized his actions toward Harry were an exact imitation of James’s actions toward himself.  Harry saw the guilt building in Snape’s eyes, and this caused Harry to feel extremely anxious. Snape had saved his life countless times, and yet all he thought to say was something selfishly concerned with himself.

“You loved my Mother?” Harry said quickly looking directly at Snape. Snape’s eyes did not move from the ground but his body relaxed.

“Always.” Snape replied softly. It was the softest Harry had ever heard Snape speak. “I promised her anything” “And tried all in my power to protect her”. “I see a hint of her boldness and kindness in you. The bit that wasn’t poisoned by your father."  Harry knew he had no reason to fight back at Snape. It was just who he was, in fact it would have been strange if Snape hadn’t ended that kindness with a cynical remark. He continued to smile and waited for him to say more.

“As much as I hated your father, I loved your mother more. You may think I am completely cold and heartless Potter. But I would never break a promise." Snape was looking directly at Harry now. There was a wanting in Snape’s eyes. A wanting for Harry to believe him. Snape didn’t have to fret. Harry believed every word and more.

“Professor... if” “If there is anything, anything at all that I could do as a favor. What could it be”? Harry asked willingly. Snape continued to look at Harry. A hint of eagerness washed over his face.

“Imagine your Mother Potter."Snape said smoothly. He must have saw Harry’s confused look because all of a sudden he flicked his wrist and a picture fell from above. It slowly flickered down and Harry caught it. It was a picture of his parents. The same picture he had had a copy of for all those years. It finally became clear what Snape was intending for him to do. Harry shut his eyes and imagined his mother. She was there in his mind instantly. Smiling at him kindly. Not sure of what to do next , Harry opened his eyes , and what he saw was an image of pure elation. There standing beside him was his mother. Completely in the flesh, looking as she did in the picture. A feeling of restlessness washed over him. His mother reached over and touched his cheek. She was there. He felt her touch. It was not cold, as he would have thought for it to be. It was warm. She then turned from Harry and looked ahead. Harry continued to stare at her and for a moment forgot entirely what was going on. But it all came back. Harry darted his head to the front and there Snape still was. Except there was another first. Snape was smiling. He was smiling not with his teeth, but even so it was a genuine smile. He stood completely motionless looking at Lilly. She was smiling back. Harry himself was wordless. There in front of him stood a man in constant sorrow. A man who had sacrificed his life for others and never once gotten anything in return. Not even a simple remark, and yet still at the sight of his true love a smile was still able to be made.

“Severus.” She said as soft as silk. Snape’s body jolted a bit to the utterance of his name. And his eyes were now uneasy. Lily began to walk towards him. She went to him and moved her hand to his cheek. Snape tensed backwards almost trying to avoid the encounter. But he stopped himself and stood incredibly still. “After all this time Severus?"  She asked with a hint of pain yet also with astonishment. Snape’s image of bravery for the first time in his life failed. A tear slide down the side of his face as he opened his mouth.

“Always."