Snuff(ed) Out

My Slipknot-inspired story. About a man who has lost the dearest thing in his life due to a single momentous mistake...

 Snuff(ed) Out

 

The graveyard lay, sprawling and dark, covered by the gray clouds on that lonely afternoon. It was a chilling place to be, even in the daytime. The rain fell relentlessly, pummelling the yew trees as they swayed, not gently in the wind, but under the rain’s sheer force. The thunder crashed, powerful flinching rumbles that seemed to shake the very earth, and the lightning slashed the skies, over and over again. The twilight embraced the world, made even darker by the raging storm all around.

 

And through all this, a lone figure began walking up the old graveyard path.

 

His hard, impassive eyes, hidden behind silvered sunglasses, surveyed the storm around him, the demented shadows cast by the lightning. The hood of his black jacket was pulled over his head, cloaking the top half of his face in darkness. In his right hand, he clutched a single red rose, not one that he had bought from a florist, but from a bush he had grown himself. His heavy boots crunched on the gravel and was soon caked in clay and mud. His gaze fell left and right as he searched for the one he’d been looking for.

 

As yet another bolt of lightning cracked the sky, illuminating the graveyard in its eerie glow, he saw the words engraved on the tombstone in front of him.

 

R.I.P.

Alice Schaefer née Michaels

12 May 1981-21 April 2004

 

He cringed away from the date. To him, it was a date best forgotten. He ran his hands over the weathered tombstone, tracing his fingers over the name on the tombstone. Shaking his head, he placed the rose gently on the grave with trembling hands. He looked up at the storm all around him, embracing the rain, thunder and lightning willingly.

 

Did he still love her, even after what she did and what he had done? Could he forgive her? No, the real question was: Could she forgive him? He definitely wasn’t the best boyfriend in the world, yet what he did...He clenched his teeth and shook his head again, driving the image out of his mind. He gazed at the dark weathered tombstone for the longest time, remembering all the times he had had with her, good and bad, and how it had ended. He turned and walked back, all the time the rain beating down on him relentlessly.

 

He drove home through the rainy day, as other vehicles drove by, as people ran through the streets, desperate for shelter, and he did not care about any of them. His mind swam with the memories of him and her together, how they had been so happy together, how they had believed they had found their true other halves.

 

Until that fateful day...The man shook his head again. Everywhere he looked reminded him of her. As he reached home, as he killed the car engine, he pulled out a small locket from the glove compartment. He got out and trudged back into his house. As he fell on the sofa clumsily, he opened the locket and stared intently at the photo inside.

 

Alice was embracing him tightly, her head on his shoulder, her eyes closed, the expression on her face that of simple happiness. Her long jet-black hair was tossed back, her slender hands locked around his waist. He in turn was stroking her hair and her face, a thin smile playing on his lips. He had never cared for wide smiles; they often made him look goofy. He cast his eyes down and grabbed a beer bottle, took a long swig.

 

Could he ever forget her?

 

Could she ever forgive him?

 

The questions rang out again and again in his head, each time slashing deeper and deeper into his heart. He grumbled softly and reached for the radio, hoping for a brief escape in music. His hand hesitated above the radio, his fingers hovering above the on switch. After what seemed like an eternity, his finger moved down and he pressed the switch. A loud voice cut across his ears.

 

“For those of you who’ve just tuned in, you’re listening to R&M 101.4 FM, the one-stop place for rock and metal music. You’re with DJ Starscream. Now it’s time for 101 minutes of commercial-free, pure music. Rock on!!”

 

As the voice faded, he heard the strum of an acoustic guitar issue from the speakers of the radio. He frowned. He knew the song very well, he had listened to it many times, yet he couldn’t remember the title. It was by Slipknot, now what was it...?

 

He remembered now. The title of the song was “Snuff”. He felt sadness rush through him like water out of a floodgate. He tried to reach for the power switch, or at least to change the station, but somehow his hands had gone numb and weak. He sat on the couch, his eyes closed. He listened intently as Corey Taylor began to sing.

 

“Bury all your secrets in my skin...

Come away with innocence and leave me with my sins...

The air around me still feels like a cage...

Love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage...

Again...”

 

He closed his eyes, swinging his head gently to the music. He remembered the happy times with her, when they first met in high school. How they had written “J.S. Loves A.M.” on the wall behind his backyard. How everyone had mocked them mercilessly, but they just laughed along. And how beautiful she was, throughout her life, which even death could not touch.

 

“So if you love me, let me go...

And run away before I know...

My heart is just too dark to care...

I can’t destroy what isn’t there...”

 

The man took off his silvered sunglasses at last. His dark, impassive eyes had softened greatly and were filled with tears. He continued gently swaying his head to the slow music, a far cry from Slipknot’s other songs.

 

“I don’t deserve to have you...

Ooh, my smile was taken long ago...

If I can change I hope I never know...”

The music dwindled into the bridge. The man continued to listen, even though on the inside he was turning black and blue.

 

“I still press your letters to my lips...

And cherish them in parts of me

Which savour every kiss...

I couldn’t face a life without your light...

But all of that was ripped apart when you refused to fight...”

 

He smiled ruefully and shook his head at those words, the first time he had smiled at all ever since he had been released. He remembered the stormy night, that stormy and regretful night when he had came across her in their room talking animatedly to someone. How he had regretted he had just returned from an extra-long stay at the pub when he had heard her and came in with the knife.

 

“...Aww...that’s so sweet! Really! Oh wow, you’re so lucky! Don’t worry, I’ll keep your little secret. Just between the two of us, I won’t tell a soul. Thanks! Love you so much!”

She put down her mobile phone and curled up catlike on her side of the bed. She then looked up, puzzled, as he glared at her.

“Who the hell was that?!”

Her eyes grew wide with horror as she saw his rage and realised what he thought had happened.

“N...no, you don’t get it. I was talking to my brother. I was! No, no, no...Stop...

 

He heard Corey Taylor sing the next verse, and the part he dreaded the most swam in front of his eyes.

 

“So save your breath, I will not care...

I think I’ve made it very clear...

You couldn’t hate enough to love...

Is that supposed to be enough?”

 

Him: “LIAR!!”

Her: “AAAAHHHH!!!”

Her pained scream echoed throughout the room as the blade of the knife slid deep into her chest, then withdrawn violently, before it slashed again and again at her stomach. Her breathing became shallower and shallower, blood trickling from her full lips, before she slid to the floor, blood pouring out of her many wounds...and her last words hung in the air like thunderstorm clouds.

“Josh...Josh Schaefer...believe me...please...”

 

To his horror, he soon found out it was true. He had been arrested, charged with manslaughter. He had been thrown into prison for twenty-five long, bitter years. Schaefer couldn’t bear to hear the song anymore, yet his body would still not obey him, his limbs still remained stiff. The memories were too much to handle anymore. Too much for him.

 

“My own was banished long ago,

It took the death of hope to let you go...”

 

The music dwindled to the bridge again, but it was heavier this time. Schaefer clutched at his chest. All his efforts to keep his world intact had proven futile yet again. As the last verse of the song played, he felt Alice’s fury in the words.

 

“So break yourself against my stones...

And spit your pity in my soul...”

 

Finally, Schaefer could move again. He rushed to the drawer and drew out something from his pants pocket. He held it, his hands trembling. The glint of the blade shone in the light of the room.

 

He smiled to himself. Now, he could make amends to Alice at last. He deserved this, he deserved it more than anything else in the world.

 

“My love was punished long ago,

If you still care, don’t ever let me know...”

 

As it had done to Alice, the blade cut a bloody swathe through his chest. However, he did not scream out in pain. He was already in so much pain, that this, this was nothing, nothing at all. He embraced the darkness that fell around him like a cloak.

 

The radio continued to play, only now there was no one to listen to it. 

Author's Note

Image taken from Wikipedia

Reviews

[~Shmi~]

Hey, the story was awesome! I enjoyed it till the end.
I especially like how feelings are brought up :)

[MissWordSmith]

great work here friend! i mean, you seem to have this gift with story telling. you write so maturely and so well.
seriously enjoyed reading this. keep up the great work!!

[Luke Masters]

Went and found the song - Love that too!!

[Luke Masters]

Wow... dude. I can't believe you're 15. You have an excellent writing style already... I thought I was all right when I was a teenager and I cringe at what I wrote when I read it back now, but you... you're already really, really good. What a tormented story... It gave me chills. I once knew an English teacher who told her students to write only from a place they understand... I didn't believe her then and I sure as hell don't now.

And as a p.s. I love Corey Taylor's song off the Spider-Man soundtrack "Bother" - check that one out if you haven't already.

Well done.

[xXx]

ps. i think you're 15 going on 45 .. a real author in the labor here!

[xXx]

wow!!! i was there in this REAL atmosphere .. your technique of weaving real life into the story brings the reader amazingly into the reality that this is actually happening .. absolutely loved the trip and the end is poignant!!

[Coyote Poetry]

A excellent story. You led us end. Kept my attention. Left me with a sad ending. Thank you.
Coyote

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

What a powerful story of redemption. You put a twist on it that is totally original. This story was gripping.
Even with the terrifying weather outside...the storm inside his soul was even more frightening.

[The_Dreamer]

Aww.. what a sad ending...but I really like the way you write!!

[Jasiel Moreira]

Simply WOW. I was reading this very intently and I just couldn't stop. Came up to the song and I put it on. Couldn't have been a better match. Very vivid, Very emotional, Very real. Great write and hope to see more in the future. Highly recommend this. Still feeling the chills!!