Shattered Part 2

The rest of my rap about child abuse...hope you like it.!

 Shattered Part 2

Hear her cries in the night

Hear her sob and pray

For someone to come and take her away

Away from the hell that is her life

Like when Dad got drunk, threatened Mum with the knife

Now the picture’s all wrong, she wanna tear it up

‘Cos right now her life is just all messed up

Think back to the time when we were still one

Now the ties are frayed and coming undone

Save her now from this miserable fate

Save her now, it’s not too late

Try to reach for the surface but dragged down again

Hold on to me ‘cos girl I’m your friend

 

No

They don’t know what it’s like to be like this

Shattered all over again

Take

Take my hand as I reach out to you

Being out in the endless rain

 

Nothing left for me, nothing left for her

Only bitterness, hate, deceit and fear

Hold on sweetie, you’re not the only one there

In our indifferent world there are still those who care

No time to lose, we have to act now

We’re gonna reach out to her somehow

And everyone else who’s in that state

Help them now, while it’s not too late

And just when she thought everything was gone

Now she finally got to see the dawn

And you’ll get what you deserve in the end

For taking it out on her over and over again

 

No

They don’t know what it’s like to be like this

Shattered all over again

Take

Take my hand as I reach out to you

Being out in the endless rain

Reviews

[Fallen Angel]

great piece...well written!

[Hippy]

this peice is much better than the first in my opinion i feel you opened up much more in this peice great job

[Coyote Poetry]

Poem is very good. The story is well written. I like the ending. The description and detail made the story outstanding.
Coyote

[The Last Poetic King]

I liked this, and it seemed like something Eminem would sing. I felt the emotion, and was rather delighted with this piece. good job.

[Senseless whatever]

good job. Really gets your heart pumping with the emotion expressed.

[MissWordSmith]

as good as the first Shattered. I love the way you wrote both these pieces. truly beautiful.

[A.Lee]

This is a beautiful, beautiful piece of work. It really tugged at my heart strings. I loved the way you painted your words... They carried the perfect amount of emotion, care, and empathy for this girl. Fantastic job, I could definitely hear it going to a tune. 100% and its going in my favorites.

One of my favorite lines:
"Hold on sweetie, you’re not the only one there
In our indifferent world there are still those who care"

Lovely piece of work. Keep writing.

[Jasmine]

really good...reminded me a bit of the script's song "we cry"...great poem...really beautiful.

[Moalix]

This is very good. As I read it I was definately singing it. Very nice write. ^^

[Sseoni]

I can imagine this being sung. Very intense emotion! A brilliant and moving poem! I really enjoyed reading part 1 and 2! I feel as though you poured a bit of yourself into this poem! It's so emotional, that it seems real! I loved it! :D