Report A02 - Operation 022

Continuation of Report A01

PROGRAM Command: Autonomous Control Program of Unit CR 048 automatic override. Personality loop activated.

In the same moment, I find myself in two bodies. I quickly duck down with the functional unit, while lying still with the other. If the kid sees two units there, especially one with a gun, the whole plan will topple. I cannot allow that. My processors race, trying to think of how to react.

I need to hide the second unit, the working one. And draw attention to the first. Except they’re right next to each other, so the hiding part will be difficult.

I shove the carbine under the couch. It’ll be out of the way. The damaged drone stands up, leaning heavily on the good leg, and I see the kid, still sitting on the couch. He looks at me with wide eyes, not sure what woke him up.

I crouch along the floor with the second unit. The door leading to the bedroom is open.

“What happened?” the kid’s voice is fully awake and not a bit sluggish. He stands up to get a better look.

“I tripped, my leg is damaged,” I reply and stop the other drone in it’s tracks. If he hears something, then it’s all over. I need some covering noise.

“Do you need help?” the kid asks. Perfect, something to occupy him. “Yes, I do,” I hop on my one good foot towards the kid, and he comes up to support me. He looks at the floor where I fell, inspecting it.

The second drone starts up again. I’m almost at the door, but there is a short distance between the couch and the entrance that has no cover. One more time, something to grab his attention.

“Could you set me down on that chair?” I nod towards the chair furthest away from the bedroom. He nods and helps support my weight as I slowly walk my way across the room.

He is turned away from my hiding place, the perfect opportunity.  I stand up, walk through the door, and close it with one swift motion. Safe.

The teenager lets me down onto the chair. Using the second drone, I find the darkest spot in the bedroom and crouch into there. I power myself off, holding the parts to my chest.

And I am back in one, the damaged, unit. And two objects in the apartment that the kid cannot find under any circumstances, the gun and robot.

“What happened to you leg? It looks fine,” he sits down next to me.

“I don't know. The driver might be corrupted, or the leg might be falling apart. Either way, I can’t fix it,” I explain.

“Well, good morning to whatever’s left of you,” he says, standing up. I look to my left, there wasn't anything there. Was he delirious? He gestures to me, pouring himself a cup of water, “That is why I don't want to transplant, robots just fall apart.”

“If you hit them on the head with a pipe, they will,” I say, trying to imitate the rise and fall of his voice. “I should have been in repair hours ago.”

“Well, sorry about that,” he sloshes the water inside his cup for a moment, then looks at me. His face is expressing yet another emotion.

“Where is the bathroom?”

The bathroom? I search for the word in my database. I haven't heard the word in a while, otherwise it would be in my short term memory. The results come back, and I see my mistake. A biological human would not only have to intake food, but also excrete it somewhere.

“Those have been obsolete for the past seventeen years, I watch as his features droop. ” A silence pervades the room as he takes in the information. Too much lag in the human brain. “Did you not know?"

“I kind of still expected them to be around for some reason, silly me,” his eyebrows raise. He sets the cup down on the table. It’s a crude plastic thing that can hold water, probably meant to be a covering or lid for something.

“How did you do it before?” I question.

The kid’s past, before he decided to break into a hotel, was incredibly hard to piece together. He had enough money for false teeth (theoretical results of Server A37), enough food and water to survive 18 years, clothes, and was still unaware of advancements. Like the replacement of bathrooms with two way feeder tubes.

“I - uh,” he hesitates. I find a text that lists hesitation as a characteristic of deceit. “I was doing it in a bag, number two’s. And I just went number one on drains,” his voice is tense. Number one and number two? I search for the terminology, and quickly find it around the 2010’s mark.

So he had bags and drains at his disposal. Bags were easy to find almost everywhere, but drains? Only in residential areas, so he had to live around the city.

“Where are your parents?” I question. He couldn't be living alone, someone would have to have taken care of him, at least until the ten-eleven year old stage.

“Dead. I think,” his response is immediate. His fingers intertwine themselves in his lap. “I barely remember them.”

Long Term Memory in the human species only begins to develop at around the age of three standard years, always between late two and four.

His parents died at four years. I note than in a document with a profile of the kid.

“Who takes care of you then?” I ask. He looks at me with an odd facial expression. My databases start up, trying to figure out what emotion is being displayed.

“I do,” he says, question in his voice. Surprise? Fear? Boredom? No, I can't place it.

“Before that, after your parents died,” I expand. Are humans really this stupid? I notice that I haven't talked to one in a while.

“I -,” he shakes his head, looking at the ground. His eyes get puffy and red; is that a disease? The results come back negative. “I don't know,” he finishes.

“You’re lying,” I tell him.

He looks at me. Wide eyes, pause in activity, that constitutes… mild surprise. Why is he surprised, did I do something surprising? ‘Humans are idiots’, I record in the document on human mental capability.

The boy closes his mouth, nods his head in a slow gesture, as if agreeing with me, and stands up. He obviously isn't going to break the silence. I try to find the gestures in my database, fixing them to emotions. Nothing comes up for a few milliseconds.

“It is imperative that you do not lie when I will question you,” I tell him. He ignores me, and looks for something on the wall. Anger? Stress? Anxiety? Depression?

“I still need to go. You know, out,” he motions to the door. I scan my RAM, containing the conversation.

“Okay,” I say, but my servers heat up. Go out to excrete? How? Someone will see him, civilian activity only increases at night. And it’s 05:12 and still dark outside, except for the constant flashing of advertising boards and other street lights.

But who says he has to go outside? All he needs is a bag, right? I can get one of those, they might even be in the apartment. Well, probably not actually.

“I can go get you a bag,” I tell him, studying his facial expressions. “So you can go number one and two into it.”

“Can't I just go outside?” the kid looks at me with another curious expression.

“The program might see you,” I remind him. Ironic, I’m helping him hide from myself.

He nods, and looks out the window towards the city. The lights of advertising boards illuminate his face, his features. I take a picture of his profile, saving it for future reference.

“Can you go do that then?” he turns towards me. I stand up, careful to not make any needless noise, and walk to the doorway.

I open the door with a clink, and step into the hallway. My hand hesitates, and I peek at the kid. He’s still standing there, looking out the window. Probably processing something, or thinking. That’s the word.

…

I attract way too much attention.

By now word has sort of gotten around that a robot lives on the thirteenth floor, and the people coming in for the day were obviously recording me as I walked through the lobby. My systems wonder what they will make of it, a police unit going to it’s apartment and returning with it’s head bashed in. Because they know it’s a robot; robots always have stripes on their left shoulder.

I review the information I have on the kid’s history. Dead parents, lived in urban environment, sponsored by someone, and has no clue what the heck is happening around him. Interesting.

A possible solution is that he was simply adopted by a modern human. A rich modern human, who managed to somehow get past my security and hide him away. He could’ve built a bathroom specifically for him, and basically created a biologically friendly environment. A life modeled on the 2010’s.

I dig around in the trash pile in the alleyway, quickly coming up with a bag full of scrap aluminum parts. My hands dump the metal back onto the pile, then crumple the bag to get a better grip on it. 

I take a gander at the trash again, trying to see if there isn't anything bigger, when the alert comes.

Distress Signal: Human AY-1837, Location: The Century Dormitory. All units activated.

A distress signal. From the Century Dormitory. I look up at the shiny glass building, towering over me and spouting advertisements into the night. Why a distress signal, did something happen?

And then everything clicks together.

I turn around quickly, mindful of my faulty leg, half-running and half-walking down the alley to the main street. Already, civilians were receiving orders to evacuate the area, and they streamed past me in groups at their own, leisure pace. 

And the policing units were receiving orders to come, to check the area, to find him. I quickly check the security cameras in my room. The kid wasn't there. He didn't even bother to close the door.

It’ll be hard to pull this one off with any sort of realism. Yes, biological humans are much too unpredictable.

Reviews

[McBear]

Hello, Meeks. I am practicing my critiquing skills. So.. in that case.. I did my best job to critique until the part of.. “I tripped, my leg is damaged,” I reply and stop the other drone in it’s tracks. If he hears something, then it’s all over. I need some covering noise." Tell me what you think and if you think I should continue..

*
* I put "*" where I start to critique a new line.. and "-" where I wrote the critique.

"If the kid sees two units there, especially one with a gun, the whole plan will topple. I cannot allow that." - Seems as if he is thinking this in his head. Make it in ittalcs? * "I need to hide the second unit, the working one. And draw attention to the first. Except they’re right next to each other, so the hiding part will be difficult." - This seemed a little scratchy to me, nothing bad though. I dont't think you can use "and" at the start of a sentence. Maybe combine this into something like.. "I need to hind the second unit; the working one. I also need to draw attention to the first, except they're right next to eachother. This means that the hiding part of this will be differcult." This seems a little more easily understandable to me. *
"I shove the carbine under the couch. It’ll be out of the way. The damaged drone stands up, leaning heavily on the good leg, and I see the kid, still sitting on the couch. He looks at me with wide eyes, not sure what woke him up." - When you say "It'll be out of the way" maybe use ittalics to show he is thinking that. Where you say "The damaged drone stands up, leaning heavily on the good leg, and I see the kid, still sitting on the couch. He looks at me with wide eyes, not sure what woke him up." - Seems a bit garbeled to me. Tried to clear it up a bit how about this? The damaged drone stands up, leaning heavily on its good leg. I see the kid, he is still sitting on the couch." Where you say "not sure what woke him up" Who woke him up? It said he was sitting there, not sleeping.*
“I tripped, my leg is damaged,” I reply and stop the other drone in it’s tracks. If he hears something, then it’s all over. I need some covering noise. - On this line where you said “I tripped, my leg is damaged,” I think you are supposed to use a period at the end of that diologue since there isnt the same person talking after.

[Meeks]

Some critique on your critique? Heck, why not.
It's actually really insighful, lot of good information I can use. If anything, I would make it less jumbled-up, try to keep the paragraphs short. Not that anyone cares, I'll read it all three times anyway, it's just that it makes it easier.

Good job by the way. Rated constructive. Thanks for the amazing, constructive and only critique of my story! ;)

My responses:
The italics thing is... horrifying to think about. I found a website on when to use italics in monolgue and it is very, very very long and even more detailed. Heck, I'll read it all!
And then fix what I have to fix, I guess.

You can start sentences with a preposition, especially dialogue/monologue. It's discouraged though, so I'll see if I can change it.


Thnks again for the critique!

[McBear]

Ah. Thank you for teaching me something! :) I never would have known that! By all means, comment on my critiques :D

[annalysiar]

Your robot sounds rather human in this chapter, maybe its just because I read it again.
I love the detail, that's great.On your sentence:" Why a distress signal, did something happen?"
it sounds more like two questions than one.

[Archos]

The story seems too vague to me at this point. Until now it was really gripping, but since nothing significant has happened, nothing that would unfold the story a little more, it is becoming a little boring. (that's just the impression from this last part and it might be different if read continuously) The style is good as always, of course.

[Meeks]

Thanks for the review. I'll see if I can add an overarching tension to help everything, not sure how though.

[Archos]

I don't think tension is what it needs. More like something that would make us care about the characters - you've been stretching the main conflict (or concept) from the beginning without giving the reader any satisfying sense of closure (which doesn't have to be a stop for the plot). But as I said, it might appear different when read as a whole, since this is my impression after reading a chapter a day.

[Meeks]

I'll see if I can include a savethecat scene here. Thanks for the comment, really helps.

[annalysiar]

Wow great write machinery isn't something I can really comprehend but your human helped great write😃 I would like to read more if you write more

[Meeks]

Thanks for the comment.
Sorry for the timing, I'll try to review some of your writing soon.

[annalysiar]

Lol no I just got that ita part of a book I have to read it again its okay take your time I'm working on my stuff and putting new things up😃😃