Action without words

Let me tell you a story.
It reminds of the good days when we sat behind the flowers of the summer months. When we watched the moon so high in the sky, and you held my hand as I hoped to stay out later. To watch the sun rise. But it always ended with a kiss on the lips as you walked me home just past 4, and I sat in the window as you made your way back to your own bed. I could never sleep.
I held my breath so the smoke would get to me faster.
I held and held until you called me the very next day.
My patience seemed to run short with you, but I always felt giddy at the sound of your voice. I always heard you smiling. Felt your warm eyes on me, though blocks away.
Nothing felt right until I felt the happiness bursting inside me, threatening to tear at the seams and destroy all I am. All I was.
Hand over hand, legs intertwined, spilling over the earth. Telling you nothing is what you want. All you need is love. all you need is money, and all you have is greed. They couldn't betray you.
He couldn't.
He wouldn't.
But how do I know anything. I'd like to know everything. But I think that would only dismantle me. Waste me. Tame me. Tell me what you need to hear, and I swear I'll say it all.
If I could only have sight beyond what's in front of me. My imagination used to run so wild and rampant. No one would judge me. No one would tell me I have to measure up to anything. But now it seems as though my life is one big competition. I'm never good enough. I'm never skinny enough. I can hardly keep my eyes in line with what I've always wanted. My dreams are truly out of reach this time. My life is truly out of balance. And my hands cannot hold onto anything that I want. That I need. The necessities of life have become scarce and rare.
Am I delusional, or am I really dying?
When this world stops lying to me, I can stand up and shout.
I can leave you now.
I can walk away.


I wish you picked up the phone, and at least told me you were about to disappear off the face of the earth.

Reviews

[flaneur]

"I'd like to know everything. But I think that would only dismantle me."

This is a deep poem that I'll be thinking about for awhile. Very nice.

[Jessica L Auster]

Another one of your amazing writes. I like how you wrote this in poetic prose form.

"All you need is love. all you need is money, and all you have is greed."

That was one of the best lines in there, and it's sadly true...especially today.

[Wolfwind Words]

Like a yo-yo this was! What a story of love, and that of one who was false. You have powerhoused the images in this! I loved the way it caught me up and i wanted to get to the end, to find out the ultimate outcome!

Great words to discribe a memory of life, and the learning experience it probably created.
Great Writing!

[Whispering Aspen]

The emotional waves in this piece are exquisite. I remember the same turbulence in my younger years. It is so sad how in such a brief moment life turns, and nothing is what it was anymore, and everything seems out of control. You're very talented at capturing those insecure thoughts and feelings in a way that hangs the reader in captivity until the end. It reads more like a short story than a poem, and I'm sure if you ever wanted to use it as such you could keep going. The ending has that sort of "unanswered questions" feel that would lend well to continuation. I'd like to pick out one particular section or part that captured me, but really there is no area more powerful or meaningful than another. Thanks for sharing this

[Silvia - Scribo, Ergo S..]

Uffff ... this is quite an emotional rollercoaster - from the "I always heard you smiling" to "But now it seems as though my life is one big competition. I'm never good enough. I'm never skinny enough. I can hardly keep my eyes in line with what I've always wanted. My dreams are truly out of reach this time."

... and still, that walking away is soooo dfficult. And still you (well, the YOU in the poem) are looking for closure. ... I can so relate to that. I felt every nuance YOU felt and felt.

In a nutshell: I really like this! xxx