Captive

just a spur of the moment poem...insert your thoughts:)

Like a fly caught in a spider’s web…

 

trapped and restrained for a predator’s late night snack,

a wounded prey, waits, anticipating the devour.

The hand ticks the sand empties, wanting to turn back.

 

Not a whisper could be managed, lips were sealed.

Through the veil a presence with anxious eyes,

submitted to silence, the stillness… concealed.

 

Then the struggle as the sickle raised in solemn linger.

Cowering as its swaying taunts the  shadows,

moving close and steady  as it directs its stinger.

 

 “Lay down your fears, allow the calm to rise and expand within,

accept fate and stop the struggles.

Become free...abandon desires to leave again.”

 

In this room I dwell with the wise and ancient, remaining passive.

In a place residing beyond the time lines of eternity,

cradled in arms… forever holding me captive.

 

Author's Note

thanks for reading:)

Reviews

[Dindella]

I can read this with various interpretations and I think that's very nice. It's very open, very dark. I like the anxiety this reads with. The foreboding, the pain, the anticipation. I can read this as an abusive relationship, someone who suffers from social anxiety and finds friendship and security anyways, peer pressure, or giving in to the stresses and pressures that people and life brings. I really like the last one, perhaps since I enjoy writing on the effects of struggle and the pain of accepting defeat, but this is really beautiful regardless of interpretation. (And again with the clever use of font

[Mel Lisa]

:) thanks again!

[Sami Khalil]

You write amazingly and convey marvelously. Thank you for sharing...:)...........................

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

Wow, this poem had such a sinister atmosphere to it. I for some reason found myself thinking of one of my characters and how he would relate well because of the fate in store for him.

[Mel Lisa]

thank you for reading!

[RichGee]

Wow...lovely work...we are all slaves to something or another or in one way or another...
This piece can apply to many things in life...very relatable work

[An owl on the moon]

There is a beautiful journey of thought you take us on... these twisting places of shadow... these lingering lines of capture and freedom and peace... This eternity sets free the soul.

[Mel Lisa]

thank you Craig, really appreciate your feedback! that is the exact effect I was going for:)

[Brianna Brie]

Hmm... this really could mean so many different things. Literally, a fly caught in a spider web. The movie "The Fly" comes to mind when in the end the fly yells, "Help me, help me" in that pitiful wee little voice. I also see the possibility of a love relationship even the voice of fate and the struggle against it. Awesome write!

[Mel Lisa]

thank you! there is so many ways to interpret this one. . lol at the "The Fly", this happen to be one of my favorite movies!

[Justin]

dang this is amazing..... great work

[Mel Lisa]

thank you!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Controlling a person is another form of negativity.. it is the way some feel better bout themselves, using the power they have over another to make themselves feel better. Nicely written, very expressive.

[Mel Lisa]

I totally agree, interesting interpretations to this piece! we should not allow others to control our emotions. we have to take charge of this, or we become captives to another's negative influence over us! great! thanks for reading:)

[Desiree B.]

Can you imagine...being caught in a web with a spider over you? Scary...

Anyway, I loved how you composed your theme in the fifth stanza. We're all slaves to something, huh?

[Mel Lisa]

yes we are! thank you for reading:)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Sometimes we wished for some things to happen...and when we are already facing at those things, we will realized we have been captives of our own desires...

"Like a fly caught in a spider’s web… "

If those arms that I longed for are the ones that will hold me...I would want to be a captive forever. LOL

Love the emotion here. Thanks for sharing this. =)

[Mel Lisa]

Thank you! I honestly had no idea where this poem was headed while composing it. eventually it started taking form and making sense. glad you were able to get the idea:)