Black Night Eyes

Black Night Eyes

A Poem by Mel Lisa
"

This is a poem about my beautiful cat name Misty. She is vibrant and full of personality! but she is such a jumpy kitty sometimes...especially during a stormy night!

"

Black night eyes

Hanging in the hollow of the abyss

they chased the stormy nights away

within that yellowed gray.

 

 

Black night eyes 

Unhinged against the crippled doors.

 

Peeking through cracks, cower in your hiding place,

 

soothe away a troubled dream...

 

for things are not quite what they seem. 

 

Black night eyes

  

Open and full as the moon 

 

staring up against the darkened night,

Slipping away, scurrying silently out of sight.

 

 

Black night eyes

 

 

Glowing, dancing and swaying on silhouettes,

anticipating the early morning slits.

Settled in your yellowed gray...

 

As they chase the stormy night away.

© 2013 Mel Lisa


Author's Note

Mel Lisa
I welcome your comments and critiques as long as it is constructive:)
I just want to grow as an artist and writer thank you so much:)

My Review

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Featured Review

Very nice poem, INCREDIBLE details. I love your word choice, it's brilliant. Great poem. I noticed one thing though, and I am not sure if it is supposed to be like that, but is creeks supposed to be cracks in your second stanza? I don't know, but nice work anyway!!!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Mel Lisa

10 Years Ago

oh good catch. Cracks would sound better! thanks!



Reviews

This is an artistic piece.
Enjoyed reading the specially crafted rhymed work.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Mel Lisa

10 Years Ago

thank you very much!
zainul

10 Years Ago

You are most welcome.:)
This is a really nice image, I really like it. Whoops, think I spotted a typo -- did you mean "not QUITE what they seem" instead of "not QUIET what they seem"? Also, in some of your lines you have developed a really nice, flowing iambic meter/rhythm -- I think, since cats are often associated with grace, that polishing your lines so that they are all truer to the iambs might vault this poem to the next level. Welcome!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Mel Lisa

10 Years Ago

thank you so much for your review and I will keep your advice in mind!
The theme with "Black Night Eyes" and then reflective words after --- sets the pace --- yet I'm more focused on the theme --- than the over-all write...I believe this type of verse is more a vocal narrative said aloud ---would give the reader your intent...this is just impo...Welcome to the Cafe...and congrats on your first book...

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Mel Lisa

11 Years Ago

thank you so much! and appreciate your perspective and thoughts on this!
Glen Yumang Manese

11 Years Ago

You're welcome...
"Black night eyes/Glowing, dancing and swaying on silhouettes"

You have quite a different style, and I love how you stirred up the visual format! It flows nicely, and your attention to detail is fantastic



Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Mel Lisa

11 Years Ago

Thank you so much I truly appreciate your feed back!

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Stats

545 Views
14 Reviews
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on November 5, 2013
Last Updated on November 14, 2013
Tags: poem, cats, kitten, pets, black cats, night, storm

Author

Mel Lisa
Mel Lisa

New York, NY



About
Hi my name is Mel and I love writing. I have been writing poetry all my life. I love the freedom it allows for an artistic soul to express their inner most thoughts !. more..

Writing