This is a poem about my beautiful cat name Misty. She is vibrant and full of personality! but she is such a jumpy kitty sometimes...especially during a stormy night!
Black night eyes
Hanging in the hollow of the abyss
they chased the stormy nights away
within that yellowed gray.
Black night eyes
Unhinged against the crippled doors.
Peeking through cracks, cower in your hiding place,
Very nice poem, INCREDIBLE details. I love your word choice, it's brilliant. Great poem. I noticed one thing though, and I am not sure if it is supposed to be like that, but is creeks supposed to be cracks in your second stanza? I don't know, but nice work anyway!!!
Wow, great poem. Everything about just seemed to come together nicely. The pacing was even, the wording was vivid, and the idea was adorable. I felt as if I was looking at life from the eyes of a cat! Lastly, I really enjoyed your metaphor:
scurrying silently out of sight.
This line made me think of a rat or rodent. Was that the intent as it made the whole poem feel as though it was about something small in the dark. Waiting. I liked it I just wondered if I had got it?
Posted 10 Years Ago
10 Years Ago
well the poem is about a frightened cat...so it would be applied to the reaction of the subject. gue.. read morewell the poem is about a frightened cat...so it would be applied to the reaction of the subject. guess scurrying is predominantly used for rodents as well lol thanks for your comment.
There was so much I know that you wanted to burst out, why did you hold back. Unless I am missing (which is rare) details?
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
this poem in particular was meant to have some mysteriousness to it. I tend not to write story len.. read more this poem in particular was meant to have some mysteriousness to it. I tend not to write story length poems. Some (that I write) are long and detailed, others, like this one...are meant to be short. that's why I love writing poetry. freedom to express even on a slight whim. its simply about a moment of observing a cat.
This is a well thorough poem! Eee, I wish I had a cat. Unfortunately, half the inhabitants of the house don't like animals, and no matter how I hold up even a tiny kitten, they always spurt out a big fat no. Although there was not any downright straightforward description of the cat's eyes, (That's not bad, it's actually really good), I found that the way you told it, all that time, I could picture large moon like cat eyes.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Thank you very much for your review. My cat was a rescued kitten. she is a black cat, very pretty to.. read moreThank you very much for your review. My cat was a rescued kitten. she is a black cat, very pretty too! Black cats get a bad rap sometime but they are truly the best!
11 Years Ago
Ah, no problem! Black cats are beautiful no matter what anyone says about them. I mean come oon (htt.. read moreAh, no problem! Black cats are beautiful no matter what anyone says about them. I mean come oon (http://i25.tinypic.com/2ngt0uc.jpg)
Very nice poem, INCREDIBLE details. I love your word choice, it's brilliant. Great poem. I noticed one thing though, and I am not sure if it is supposed to be like that, but is creeks supposed to be cracks in your second stanza? I don't know, but nice work anyway!!!
Hi my name is Mel and I love writing. I have been writing poetry all my life. I love the freedom it allows for an artistic soul to express their inner most thoughts !.
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