Souled What Was Already Mine

Souled What Was Already Mine

A Poem by mcg03002
"

A poem

"

 You drew me in with answers I had sought.

”Love me,” you said, “and I will make you whole.”

Through sacrifice of self your truth I bought;

As recompense you offered me my soul.

 

I emptied out my mind to make some room;

Ideals once valued boxed up on a whim;

Like creeping bougainvillea, quick to bloom;

Lies blossomed bright while strangled truth grew dim.

 

Afraid to show my face instead of yours;

I chomped the bit and let you take the reins;

You placed me in a boat and took the oars;

And dashed on jagged rocks left my remains.

 

 

Forlorn and lost I grasped an outstretched hand.

The soul you'd claimed was yours helped me to stand.

© 2010 mcg03002


Author's Note

mcg03002
I want to see if anyone is able to tell me what the heck I'm writing about. If someone can, I'll feel great. If not, I'll re-write!

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The first stanza sounds as though you're saying that You put your heart into this person's hands, and in return they made you feel whole. It sounds in the second, that things weren't of your moral standards, but you went with it anyway, meanwhile lying to yourself about who you really are, and what you were willing to put up with. And in the third, it sounds as though you speak of giving trust over to the other since they seem the stronger person emotionally. And lastly, you say that you were down and reached out to the person who seemed to be the 'one' only to find out that they weren't who they had claimed, but there was enough there to make you feel whole and strong while it was all happening.

I don't know if I'm completely off the mark, but that's how it comes across to me. I like this poem. I can very much relate to this one. Very nice.

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

The first stanza sounds as though you're saying that You put your heart into this person's hands, and in return they made you feel whole. It sounds in the second, that things weren't of your moral standards, but you went with it anyway, meanwhile lying to yourself about who you really are, and what you were willing to put up with. And in the third, it sounds as though you speak of giving trust over to the other since they seem the stronger person emotionally. And lastly, you say that you were down and reached out to the person who seemed to be the 'one' only to find out that they weren't who they had claimed, but there was enough there to make you feel whole and strong while it was all happening.

I don't know if I'm completely off the mark, but that's how it comes across to me. I like this poem. I can very much relate to this one. Very nice.

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

not really sure what this is about, honestly

i think a lot of different situations could be applied

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I get a religious tone from this. Reminds me of the Poem, "Foot Prints."

Nice Write!
RLG,
Tommy


Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on April 16, 2010
Last Updated on April 24, 2010

Author

mcg03002
mcg03002

Idaho Falls, ID



About
I am just a wannabe writer living in Idaho Falls. I work full time as a sales manager for a hotel. Here's a song I recorded for a dear friend. It's a cover of one of my absolute favorites. more..

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