Fun house

the halloseve tale

Who's their?

What is that?

You gave me a heartache

 

It's halloween

that's your trick

and heres your treat

 

scream and shout 

there is no need to pout

soon your lights will be out

 

Mmm my treat was devine

to bad you had to die

now your like me

 

living for eternity

now your in the funhouse

Reviews

[J.]

You used the wrong word twice. "Their" should be "there" and "heartache" should probably be "heart attack." You have some really random rhymes that are strong, but that makes only the middle of your poem strong. It makes the rest of your poem seem like they aren't as important. Your font is also distracting.

[Ruth]

The easy flow to this poem makes it such a joy to read, great piece love xoxo

[stars are far]

so well written
i loved that aloot *__*

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

An excellent read this is...and great ending!!!

[Dove]

HAHA! I love it! I had a pretty good time reading this poem and I love the rhymes. The last two stanzas were surprising... at least to me I wasnt quite expecting that. Great job.