Survival

                Many nights went by where Theodore was left alone with his own thoughts. Time ceased to exist until he finally decided to pay more attention to the sun. He remembered a summer he spent at a scout camp as a child. They taught him that approximately mid-day was when the sun was in the middle of the sky. From this one fact he started to fraction down the sky as though it was half of a pizza. Discovering this memory that he had completely forgotten about gave him incredible confidence, which lead to a spawning of hidden knowledge. Within two full sun passes he was able to build himself a shelter, build a fire and trap a few small animals to eat. Then on what seemed to be about the seventh day, Theodore was startled by a deep sloppy growl. “Great, a f*****g wild beast is hunting me!” he yelped out loud. “Didn’t get teach s**t all about bear survival at scout camp!” As he hid within his small shelter, what appeared as a massive black bear came barrelling by him followed by three crackling gun shots. With a sudden burst of excitement, Theodore peered out the hut scrambling his head in all directions. Sure enough a group of five orange vested hunters appeared in the distance. Theodore leaped out in excitement, yelling and screaming to save him. When the two parties finally came in contact Theo was knocked out by one of the hunters. Theodore woke up sore as ever to a very bright light shining in his eyes. When his eyes finally focussed upon his surroundings he realized he was hog tied, belly down with five burley men surrounding him laughing their faces off. “F**k.” Said Theo as he closed his eyes.

Reviews

[matt]

"didnt get taught s**t all about bear survival at scout camp!" I should have wrote, forgive me reviewers, forgive me.