A cure for Gay

We have found a cure for same sex love! This is just for a laugh, don't get offended.

Introducing ‘Shake you straight’ from the makers of the ‘Christian slap’ and 'Muslim bomb Protection'

We have created a cure for gays, lesbians, bisexuals and Transgender all in a pink can.

 

We have found a cure for same sex love! Don’t get trapped with programs like:

 

Pray away the gay “homosexuality is not only wrong, but curable; rely on the power of prayer to make a miracle happen.”

 

Hug the gay away: Bring back the ‘distant same sex parent’ and have them hug you for 3 days straight.

 

Make friends with straight people, they will help you bend your curve.

 

Loss your same sex attraction by joining the ‘don’t ask don’t tell’ program, because denial is the perfect solution for something that is apart of your everyday life.

 

Other known unsuccessful programs include the following:

 

• Exorcism of the gay demon
• Shock therapy 
• Hypnosis
• 'Overdosing' On Homosexuality
• Cold Showers 
• Transplants
• Cocaine, Strychnine and Genital Mutilation
• And bicycling

 

Shake you straight encourages tolerance it seems to have worked for racism, sexism, classism and many more.

Author's Note

Please please don't take this too seriously!

Reviews

[Dean Kuch®]

Hah, very witty, satrire and parodical ingredients! Sadly, many of the 'cures' you've listed have actually been tried! Reminds me of those old films they used to show in school (yeah, imagine that!) back in the 1950's and early 60's...if you've never seen one, they are really creepy. Love the people in your life unconditionally. You'll be more at peace that way...
Funny stuff!

[Louise]

Ahaha, I sat with a smirk on my face from the very first line. Good job, Maya!
There's a few typying errors here and there, but this was a funny satirical read through and through.

[Persephone]

Wonderful use of sarcasm! I loved the way you presented it as an advertisement - Similar to one you'd see on an infomercial for weight loss - Gay is not a disease to be cured - Thanks for sharing!

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the way you made your point. People can't be changed. We must respect people desire, religion and race. The only person who can change us. Is the person looking back at us in the mirror.
Coyote

[.]

This is a great satire. It is depressing that there are people in this world(like the ones in your poem) who are still like this. Great work at exposing them :)