In a clouded haze....

......sitting here alone thinking of you

Sitting in a clouded haze

counting my numbered days.

Memories of you are all I have.

Some even make me laugh.

 

My favorite remains under the Oak tree.

We were filled with glee.

Sitting side by side

our love with no place to hide.

 

You were in my arms.

Being courted by my charms.

We shared a gentle kiss.

That's what I miss.

 

Sitting in a clouded haze

counting my numbered days.

A tear falls from my eye

as the memories make me cry.

 

I remember how we use to dance

using it as a chance

to see who could be the bigger tease.

But we would always please.

 

 From the touching of our lips

to the grinding of our hips.

Showered by your scent.

I knew what true love meant.

 

Sitting in a clouded haze

counting my numbered days.

Wishing I made a better choice

so I could hear your voice.

 

Haunted by that day

I knew it wasn't okay.

You said we couldn't be,

that you were leaving me.

 

I didn't understand why

Just wanted to try

You said my anger was too much

and you no longer enjoyed my touch.

 

Sitting in a clouded haze

counting my numbered days.

You promised me our love would never end.

Guess it was a game of pretend.

 

I didn't know what to do

but I never meant to hurt you.

I needed us.

It was a MUST!

 

You were MINE!

Everything will be fine!

But the RAGE..!

Now...now I am in this cage...

 

Sitting in a clouded haze

counting my numbered days.

Author's Note

Second draft of the poem. Hope it's still as good as the original.

Reviews

[Obsidian]

A transition from happy memories to heartache Your rhymes make this a smooth read, and the repetition of the numbered days encapsulates the feeling. One wonders what happened on that day...why are you in the cage? Intriguing and leaves the reader to interpret the possibilities. Well written for sure.

[Matthew Kult]

Thank you for stopping in. It's appreciated.

Matthew

[Pikachu]

yeah agreed this is very emotional definitely one of the best great write dude

[.]

Whoa! this is amazing, it really is. This should have been first. This is powerful and deep to me. You have an amazing flow and rhyme scheme. I like this write whole bunches. Congrats on your win as well.

[deeps]

Wow this is wonderful, i really like the emotions in this.

[Ruth]

This is lovely:) The memories, the Oak Tree is awesome! Definitely worth going over although, I like it as it is lol It has an element of "Shawshank Redemption" to it, but thtas just me lol
Beautiful poem
xx