Your poem is a beautiful exploration of the way that our thoughts and memories can become distorted over time, like a piece of plastic that has been stretched too thin. Your use of language is both evocative and thought-provoking, and I found myself feeling deeply moved by the emotions you convey. The line "A filmy single-use example of want degrading love" is especially powerful - it's a reminder of the way that our desires can sometimes lead us to make choices that we later regret.
Your poem is a beautiful exploration of the way that our thoughts and memories can become distorted over time, like a piece of plastic that has been stretched too thin. Your use of language is both evocative and thought-provoking, and I found myself feeling deeply moved by the emotions you convey. The line "A filmy single-use example of want degrading love" is especially powerful - it's a reminder of the way that our desires can sometimes lead us to make choices that we later regret.
This poem throws the reader into a whirlpool of thoughts and emotions: a restless, frustrated turning around an invisible center that pulls everything in its vicinity deep down under the surface where one suffocates. it's quite ride...:)
Very good. It is a tightly wound wonderment that unravels and surprises at the end. Good work Mattavelli. I enjoyed the steps and intricacies. The plastic platitudes then turning dark. What a twist. Wrap my head around that one.
I feel the rhythm is very good yet more like a jazz erratic beat due to the purpose of no punctuation. I find this oddly fits you from the review you left me and I enjoyed reading this and look forward to read more of your work.
not as confusing as you might think Matt. the opening line may read plastic, but the poem itself has elasticity, more rubbery if you will, the more times you read, the deeper one wants to sink into the message. Great read
I wanted to add a couple of things. It is good to see you move away from so much end rhyme but at the same time your rhymed poetry hints at really great poets like Keats and Yeats. In that regard you are somewhat of an old soul. I hope you can find your genuine self.
Winston
Thanks for reading this again, Winston, and for the thought you’ve given to my poems. I enjoy writ.. read moreThanks for reading this again, Winston, and for the thought you’ve given to my poems. I enjoy writing rhythmic rhymes, because it gives my mind something to work on throughout the day. And, the writing with complex patterns and smooth meaning is my favorite to read. This poem is a splat of paint and twist of the brush that hates itself. I think there is beauty in its ugliness, if I hadn’t written it, I wouldn’t bother trying to find its meaning.
2 Years Ago
I am serious that your rhyming is quite sophisticated. If you haven’t done so, you might want to r.. read moreI am serious that your rhyming is quite sophisticated. If you haven’t done so, you might want to read Yeats or Donne.
W
2 Years Ago
I agree with Winston, your rhymes are exquisite. I also understand your sentiment about using tradit.. read moreI agree with Winston, your rhymes are exquisite. I also understand your sentiment about using traditional forms to discipline yourself and your writing. I was there once myself, and still use that process to this day, quite often beginning with a structured form before paring it down to its core.
I am a real fan of what I have read of yours to date
LIFE IS A PARTY. DON'T BE A PINATA.
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Hello,
Thanks for visiting my page. I'm Matt. I enjoy reading and writing poetry. If you have a poem that you'd like me to read, please let.. more..