City Hall - First Timers

Philadelphia's City Hall is awe inspiring.

 

Eight pairs of eyes

stare to the sky

necks craning to look

higher and higher

until rain drops

straight into their

wide open eyes

like tears.

 

Pools of cool precipitation

form in mouths with slack

jaws dropped in awe

of huge stone walls with

looming, gloomy

statues standing atop.

Breathing in rank air,

the bitter taste

of population lingers

on their tongues.

Reviews

[THE BLACK SEAL]

i like the pace of it and it gives food for thought

[Raef C. Boylan]

I really like this piece - some great imagery used to depict the awe. The tone and pace are perfect: slow, revealing and intense. Although the general connotation of awe is the 'admiration, respect' kind of awe, it seems like the awe in this piece is negative, like the City Hall serves as a reminder of something your narrator would prefer not to think about...maybe the way in which citizens are reduced to files and numbers? Perhaps I'm wrong about this, but the language of "rank" and "bitter", following on from "like tears" and "looming, gloomy/statues" gave me the impression that your narrator isn't fond of this City Hall and what it stands for.

I hope I haven't misinterpreted you?

Great poem, the scene felt very vivid, and he intrigue provoked a lot of thought.
Thanks for posting this.

[Wolfwind Words]

That was neat! never driven past there myself. But i've seen alot of awe inspiring things. The reaction of your characters was perfect! I could imagine it as if i were there myself. I like this one alot. Thanks for sharing such a cool poem!