Chapter Twenty-one

Chapter twenty-one

It was a few weeks later when I finally gave up on hiding all of my problems and vented to Simeon, “It’s all my fault.” I whispered as we sat on the couch we were supposed to move into our new house the next week, “Everything that’s wrong is my fault. If I hadn’t kissed this Phil guy then he wouldn’t be after me now. If I had spent more time with Decima then she wouldn’t feel like I care more about Reuben then my twin. If I had spent more time with… with… with…” my tears were coming way too hard now but I had to continue and with Simeon’s hold I knew I could. “If I had spent more time with Josephine she wouldn’t feel so…” I trailed off unable to come up with a word for it. “If I hadn’t gotten so close to Reuben you wouldn’t be worried about me falling in love with him and constantly…”

“Don’t add me to your worries Juliet.” Simeon interrupted.

“You’re always on my list.” I argued.

“Well you can take off a constant worry. I don’t need you worrying about me. You don’t need to worry about me.”

“What am I going to do Simeon?” I whispered.

“Relax.” He promised pushing me up off his chest and massaging my shoulders. “You’re going to sit here and you’re going to let me help you relax. You’re going to trust me and Reuben with Phil. Then this weekend you’re going to go have a girl’s weekend with Josephine and Decima.” He finished. I leaned back making it where he couldn’t massage my shoulders his voice doing more than a massage would anyway and then I lifted my face so I could awkwardly kiss him.

That afternoon I was at Reuben’s and as horrible as it was I still had no idea what was going on between the two of us. I knew I had to figure it out before Simeon and I moved out on our own though because if I didn’t Simeon would find out from my thoughts.

“Princess?” Reuben whispered, “What’s wrong?”

“I thought you’d given up on the Princess thing?” I snapped.

“I thought it might make you smile.” He frowned.

“I’m sorry…” I sighed, “I’m being a downer. I should just go.”

“Okay Aimee.” He said blocking my exit and sighing tiredly, “What’s going on? You haven’t spent more than five minutes with me alone since you and Simeon decided to move to your own house.”

“I have to.” I argued.

“When?”

“I spent the entire afternoon with you last week.”

“We spent five minutes in here and then you decided you wanted to go to the café with everybody and it turned into an all day outing.”

“What about the time before that?” I checked.

“You wanted to go out to eat then before that…” he said when I opened my mouth, “… you wanted to take everybody to the movies, and before the park, and before…”

“I really haven’t.” I whispered waving my hand to cut him off.

“No you haven’t so what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“So you just magically hate spending alone time with me?”

“No it’s just awkward.”

“I get it though Aimee you chose Simeon. You love him and I’m supposedly the best friend…”

“You are the best friend.” I whispered.

“So if I’m not the one that’s awkward it’s you because you don’t really know how you feel.” He figured it out.

“I do too.” I tried.

“What do you want me to do to help?” he asked and surprisingly he didn’t look overjoyed about me not really knowing my feelings.

“Don’t let Simeon know that I still have any feelings for you. Just let me figure out what it is we have before Simeon and I move into our house.” I whispered.

“And you think the best way to do that is by spending as little time as possible with me?” he questioned.

“I don’t know.” I shook my head.

“What are you going to do if the answer you find isn’t what you want?”

“I know that I love Simeon and he’s the one I want to be with forever it’s just…”

“It’s just?” he asked.

“I don’t know. I don’t know what’s between us and it’s something that makes Simeon question our relationship.” I shook my head but Reuben just wrapped his arms around me.

“You want to know what I found is the best way to figure out what’s going on between two people?”

“What?” I moaned.

“Kiss the other person. If it still feels like it did when we were dating then you know you still love me if it doesn’t then you know you’re out of the loop.”

“You really expect me to agree to kiss you?”

“You’ll agree soon enough when you haven’t figured it out in two weeks.” He shrugged, “Until then we can just hang out and you can risk Simeon hearing about it in your mind.”

“Or I could risk Simeon hearing about me kissing you in my mind?” I suggested.

“He could hear about you kissing me and it disgusting you in your mind instead of the thoughts that he’s…” he trailed off shaking his head.

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing.”

“Tell me.”

“It’s nothing.”

“Ugh…” I shook my head and went to sit on the bed. He followed me though and just sat beside me holding me and after a couple seconds I found myself laying there with my head in his lap.

“I’m sorry you’re so confused.” He whispered when I was almost asleep.

“You’ll stay quiet though?” I checked.

“Yes.” He nodded and so I just let myself drift asleep.

“Is she sleeping?” Simeon’s soft voice woke me up.

“Looks like it.” Reuben whispered and instead of letting either know I was awake I just let myself stay still.

“Did she talk to you about what’s been bothering her so much lately?” Simeon asked, “She seems like she’s sleeping better. I really hadn’t expected her to sleep for so long when I said not to wake her up.”

“Yeah, well she’s worried that you’re still worried she’s in love with me.”

“She is in love with you dummy and you know it as well as I do.”

“I know but I was just relaying what she’d told me.”

“Do you think that she’ll end up figuring it out and go back to you?” Simeon asked him.

“No she’s made it clear to me any time she can that she chose you and that you are the one she wants forever.”

“You know Josephine’s convinced one day we’re going to be as close as we used to be thanks to her.”

“Well, look at what she’s already made us do.”

“I wouldn’t have ever thought after all of that we could be talking again.”

“Especially over a girl we both love.” That sparked my attention.

“Thank you… I don’t know if I told you this but thank you for saving my life that night… for being there on our engagement even though it hurt you… and for backing down some.” I was waiting for the true sign that their twin bond was coming back this would be the time that I would have told Decima that the boy I loved had told me today that he was trying to figure everything out.

“Simeon…” Reuben started, “… Don’t get mad at Aimee and don’t tell her I told you… she said that you are the one she wants and she’s positive of that…”

“But?” Simeon asked tensely as I smiled a little in Reuben’s chest their twin bond might only be showing up at times right now and be a very small one but it was definitely coming back.

“She’s actually sleeping better because I agreed to help her figure out a way to find out if she still has feelings for me. She wants to put your mind at ease… and hers?”

“She has nightmares of you changing her.” Simeon whispered painfully and I fought tears.

“What do you mean?”

“I mentioned the fact that I knew you’d agreed to change her if I wouldn’t and she told me about them and I know she hopes that her thoughts didn’t make it over to me but they did. She forgot all about her love for me and only had one for you.” A wimper made it out of me and I felt Reuben’s arms tighten before he pulled me up.

“It was just a dream.” He promised me and I pulled away from him looking at Simeon and crawling over to him.

“What was it, Juliet?” Simeon whispered.

“Nothing,” I whispered hiding in his chest but he pulled my face up and kissed me softly.

“I love you.” He promised.

“I love you too.”

“So will you please tell me about your dream?” I shook my head even harder and he sighed and just held me.

“Can we…?” I started and he picked me up but looked confused when I shook my head, “Can we go to dinner with Reuben?” I asked.

“You haven’t let the two of us together until now.” Reuben said.

“I woke up and you two were together without fighting. Actually it looked like you two were having a voluntary civilized conversation. I’m very proud.” I smiled. “So I want to treat my best friend and fiancé to dinner.” I knew after their conversation that I had no choice I couldn’t try to figure out if I had feelings for Reuben: if I did have any feelings for him I already knew they weren’t enough to matter with my relationship with Simeon, and after hearing their talk they both thought they knew I did and so I’d just have to forget the awkwardness and move on. Make them realize that I had a best friend and a future husband that were twins.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go home and sleep?” Simeon asked softly.

“Am I actually sleeping?” I asked.

“What happened while you slept?” Reuben asked.

“Plenty,” I smiled widely, “I figured everything out. I’m ready to move into mine and Simeon’s house. I’m ready for my girl’s weekend and I’m ready…” I trailed off shrugging, “Well you probably don’t want to hear the rest.” Simeon’s arms tightened around me as he caught on and his lips found my ear.

“Are we going to dinner or are you two going home?” Reuben asked.

“No we’re going to dinner.” Simeon said and I looked at him surprised. He smiled at me and kissed me softly, “It will all make sense later.” He promised. So we all got into the car and he drove us to the fanciest restaurant in town.

“How do you get us seats in those places?” I asked him on the way home.

“I’ve got hookups.” He promised.

“Sure…” I sighed scooting over into the middle so I was laying in his chest. I was always glad when I decided I wanted to lay on him when he was driving that my fiancé was a vampire because no human would be able to do it as safely as he was able to.

“Comfortable?” he laughed and I realized that I’d accidently sent him my thoughts.

“Very.” I smiled up at him straining so that I could reach his lips he realized what I was trying to do though and bent down so he could kiss me. When he pulled away to rearrange me I realized that while he’d been kissing me he’d also parked the car on a back road perfectly. I didn’t spend much time thinking about it though because then his lips were back on mine and my hands moved to his pants but he pulled away. “Why not?” I asked.

“You’re first time is not in a car.” He reminded me.

“I changed my mind.” I managed kissing him again.

“I booked us a hotel for this weekend while we were at the restaurant let’s just wait until then so that I can make sure it’s all the way you’ve wanted it.” He sent in his mind but the process of sending a thought was so intimate he was the one that was pulling me back to him and kissing me. He didn’t reach for anything though and neither did I. We both knew we’d make it until the weekend because that’s when Simeon said we were going to make it to so there was no point in me fighting it.