Poetry Found Dead

A report is coming in that a large amount of poetry has been found dead.

 

The poetry was found near Parliament Hill Fields early this morning by a man walking his dog. The man, a Mr Frost, said he normally does not take that particular route to the fields, but decided that morning to take the road less traveled by.

The Poetry Police say the poems were probably written sometime in the last ten years by people aged between 12 and 98, and who may or may not be poets. The poetry appears to have been savagely murdered.

 

The Po-Po also revealed that at this point they suspect the P.L.O (Poetry Liberation Organisation) The I.R.A (Intelligentsia Reviewing Association) and P.A.G.A.N (Poets against Gushing Appraisals & Narcissism.) The dead poetry is also being heavily linked to 'the internet.'

 

On the possible reasons for the unusually frenzied murder, a spokeswoman for the Poetry Police, Carol A. Duffy, said “Poetry is series of intense moments. I’m not dealing with facts, I’m dealing with emotion. This is perhaps why it is such a bloody mess over there.”

 

Rumors abound that the motive for the killing is linked to the possible torture the dead poetry might have administered on its readers within a ten year time frame. The Po-Po is unable to confirm or deny the rumor, but did say that there has been a lot of gang-poet related warfare recently. The violence has taken on many forms, from hurtful comments on ‘comments’ to outright ruthless stabbings via a computer keyboard. One poet was injured so badly that it took sixteen minutes for them to recover before carrying out their revenge with a sinister, yet skilful, use of a Haiku.

 

The Po-Po is appealing to the writing public for any information on the murdered poetry. In a statement released earlier they called for people to keep calm and carry on writing and appraising in whatever way they see fit, being always mindful that any further writing could result in yet more murdered poetry.

Reviews

[icaros13]

"In later news, the problem of unclaimed corpses caused by the poetry murders continues to escalate. It seems no one is willing to claim responsibility for the mangled words. A.S.P (Advocacy for Sub-par Poetry) has been asked to help with the problem, but spokesperson Feta Palaver told reporters earlier today, "...we have dealt with some terrible dead poetry, but this is a mess even we aren't equipped to clean up..."

This story had me laughing out loud. It is extremely clever and humorous. I didn't see "story" under the title, so I was expecting a poem. You have made my evening, Rosalind.

[Rosalind Gale]

I am happy icaros - to make your evening is a compliment indeed! And I enjoyed your 'report' too - maybe we should create a dead poetry fanzine!
-xx-

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

I hope to become your friend soon, and yeah, I think we def all lived vicariously through this masterpiece..I forgot to take myself seriously the whole time I was making dinner

[Lina Grey]

I find both the your story, Rosa, and icaros's comment quite hilarious. If you create a dead poetry fanzine, I would very much like to be a part of it ^_^ This is like nothing I have seen before. Bravo! Thank you.

[icaros13]

I think a fanzine would be spectacular! It does make me wonder, though, if any of my poems are among the remains... probably...lol

[Lina Grey]

Your's as well as mine. I like your poetry. You have an insightful and unique style that I, for one, wouldn't want to throw away. I wouldn't like to think that mine would be among the remains, either, but you never know until you look, I'd say. lol

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlander]

well, I can hack mainframes, but apparently only the ones in the more insufferable dimensions, yet these rss feeds make about as much sense to me as the sound potatoes make when hit with chinese stars..only time will tell..as far as your theoretical conflicts, these will be resolved by the baby demon's tail drinking the wind, or say I assume...

[Dr. Wood ?]

terrific stuff my girl...Unique and hilarious...Can't wait for the movie

[Rosalind Gale]

...!! Thanks!!
-xx-

[Kristallo]

This was so entertaining, I love your clever acronyms (Poets against gushing appraisals & Narcissism) Lol... really good story, I don't know why but I expected it to be something entirely different. Such a pleasant surprise.

[Rosalind Gale]

Thank you Kris!
-xxx-

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

This is truly priceless! It was much needed and well said. I am still shaking my head and laughing... love the "Po-Po" - just too good.

[Rosalind Gale]

Thanks so much!
-x-

[...]

LOL...so unique and entertaining! Shows well, your diverse form of expression :)

[Rosalind Gale]

Thanks so much my dear Lynn -
-xx-

[Mickey Hilts]

agree with all, very very funny and witty, also shows another side to your writing, you have range of ideas and thoughts.thanks for this piece

[Rosalind Gale]

Thank you!
-x-

[Leslie Philibert]

This is clever, funny, the best thing I`ve read this morning, really good.

[Rosalind Gale]

Thank you Leslie -
-x-

[Dean Kuch®]

What a magnificent way you've chosen to get your message out there! I laughed out loud when reading this imaginative piece of work, I'll must admit! It read very realistically, as if one were watching a SPECIAL REPORT! on CNN.
Keep on writing YOUR way, may the critics be damned!

[Rosalind Gale]

Thanks so much Dean -
-x-

[New Dawn]

This was great, so very clever, i often find myself voyeur to some grand histrionics on this site. I usually just sit back and watch. It amazes me how intelligent people can get drawn into arguments about nothing. I refuse to leave pointless reviews. I prefer instead to search this sight for those little gems that shine and then inform the writer that, for me, this is quality. I know what I like, simple as that. This made me laugh and for that I thank you. Loved the revengeful Haiku, absolute class!

[Rosalind Gale]

Thanks so much!
-x-

[Coyote Poetry]

A very entertaining story. I like the way you brought me in and how the story of the murdered poetry seek more to join the journey. Thank you for the excellent story.
Coyote

[Rosalind Gale]

Thank you Coyote
-x-

[Shmoke-Sifted Heftlande..]

so yeah I hacked into the Lazarus (lazy anarchist zoolander-ish acrobats recognizing underlying statistics) mainframe and I found out more dirt on the haiku ninja..it appears he also once slapped the lawnmower man w/ a shark post-coitally somewhere off the coast of atlantis. But they'd been up for days shooting mercury in their asses cause the AZT just wasn't doing it for them anymore...but I digress....
this poem has inspired me to write something like a self-fulfilling prophecy divided by zero. It's nothing like those awful elvis suits I was selling with the imaginary number thread counts...
So yeah, lazarus has also informed me that your poem gave birth to a demon baby that already speaks fluent butterfly..the difficulty level for this feat was atlantian (no connection with the ninja)
when tesla told me computers could audibly project reincarnation onto the electromagnetic field under a superimposed episode of looney tunes, well I believed him, but I was secretly right handed

[Rosalind Gale]

I wish you were here, now.