To My Dear Dead Mother

Mother dear, do you recall
The day you broke down in the hall?
Do you remember why you cried ?
Why father hurt you deep inside ?
The old man gone for weeks on end
Did cause your lonely heart to rend
With sadness, made a desperate plea,
Come home Steve, please come home to me!
 
I watched you there in that half light
Your face collapsed, your shoulders slight,
The tears were running down your cheek,
I should have helped, I felt so bleak.
A little boy can only grasp
The simple things, the easy task.
When tears and sobbing overtake
A small boys courage tends to break.
So I stood there sadly watching you
Way back in 1952.
 
I recall trailing after you,
My little sister trailing too.
In failing light you staggered home
Your high heels dragging on the stone.
You’d been to McKyatt's corner bar
To meet the girls and share a jar.
We had a raspberry ade or two
And the time quite got away from you.
The cupboard's empty and the pan
So that nights meal was bread and jam.
 
Some days we spent beneath the bed
Whilst you and father fought and bled,
We put the fingers in our ears
And saw the wire wove through tears.
I’ve tried to recall happy days
But my head only plays replays
Of all the bad and sorry stuff
That made our childhood,
…  Oh so tough!
 
The last time that I saw you Mum
You looked so shrunken, thin and glum,
You lay there in that little bed
With a pillow propped beneath your head.
I can’t remember now, your words
But I know my father lost his nerve.
He cried for all the broken dreams
His tears reflected silent screams.
We left you there with hollow eyes
And kissed you without last good byes.
 
For years I’ve thought about you Mum
Wondered why it went wrong,
And I’ve come to the conclusion that
The war destroyed your song.
That war destroyed your happiness
It robbed you of your youth.
It stole your key to peace of mind
And muddied love and truth.
It took away prosperity
And sucked up all your life.
It deprived you of togetherness
And caused your marriage strife.
You couldn’t live with tension Mum
You needed party time,
I understand all this because
Your feelings, Mum,
…Are mine.
 
Marshalg
Mangere Bridge
11th April 2008
 

 

Reviews

[Joe Shetina]

I can tell how heartfelt this is. To be able to share something like this transcends the ability to write.