The All-Too Familiar Solution

I put myself in someone else's shoes for a minutes, and my mom starts yelling about how I need to go to a counselor...someone tell me when it pays off to be a poet :)

Blink

with the falling of a tear, you're gone.

 

Jump

from one love to another, searching for what went wrong

 

Cry

silently, wanting the pain to disappear with my tears.

 

Fight

for sanity, for an end, for another beginning.

 

Feel

everything too much, I don't want this clarity.

 

Release

let the blood flow. I deserve this.

 

Soar

from the high the crimson brings me.

 

Plan

the perfect escape from all the ghosts of my past.

 

Shut-out

the people who act like they care. Who only wind up hurting themselves

 

Run

from my fears like a coward. It's only a matter of time.

 

Fall

I earned my wings, watched my body slump to the floor.

 

Another beginning.

Reviews

[Kat Collins]

Always amusing when someone believes you're literal in your art...that what you are saying is always what you're feeling. Not always the case! I've had it happen to me before many times.

As to the poem...it expresses the emotion and sweet release of suicide, letting the blood flow...giving the pain somewhere to go besides inside yourself. It makes me sad that people see that as the only way to stop the pain, though. But I can understand and relate....it's a dark, slippery path when you feel the walls closing in and nowhere to turn. Death is welcomed with open arms.

Only critique is the one line

the people who act like they care. Who only wind up hurting themselves

It doesn't quite fit with the rest of the flow of the piece. Disrupts the rhthym, I think.

[none]

From an end to a new beginning, hoping for a new way. I liked it, the style is different from the usual. Good job.

[AndyJCash]

I like the structure of the piece, very clever and helps with rhythm. As said by Kat, I found the same line disrupted the flow slightly, a little long winded. Disregarding that, a good write :)