Mother

Please tell me if this poem makes sense to you...I wrote it after two days with very little sleep, and while it makes perfect sense to me, I'm not sure if the general public really "gets it".

Mother says to find Yourself �"

Not hard to do--the crooked elf

 

Is leering high on Mother’s shelf.

Collecting dust with ol’ Myself.

 

Mother says to just be You.

 As if she wrote her own “how-to”

 

She’ll scoff with Me upon her view

Two shelf-strewn lovers, molding blue.

 

Mother says be true to Me

Or love Myself, or look and see�"

 

That only You can aim to free

Yourself from lost identity.

 

…

Mere words can cause a girl to stress

Afraid to fail her mother's test 

of standards that should have been compressed 

Now fragile boundaries are transgressed

Shattered, left in all the mess

is a girl who tries her very best

Hoping her mother will attest 

To the crime of causing much distress...

Mother's shelf that once oppressed

Her daughter's heart is put to rest...

By smashing and stomping 'til nothing's left.

 

Watching her daughter wipe off the mess

She smiles hearing, "I am the best"

 

Reviews

[Rahman Bin Taleb]

nice and glamorous.heart awakening poem.

[solo2be]

Very well written, and very thought provoking.

[Just Another Writer]

Wow. This is composed really well. It left me thinking.. You had a nice definition of rhythm, and conveyed emotion very effectively to the reader. An all around good poem.. nice job!

[salvador (camuel choisu..]

i really enjoyed this piece of art, i felt the deep passionate emotion that wrote this beautiful piece.

[Kaylor Mason]

Nothing like an overbearing mother who can try to build you up by tearing you down every day! I really like this--it's true for men as well as women. What's really awful is when good ol' mom starts pointing out that you're getting old, and you're still alone. I've had my fair share of that.

[Danielle]

I really liked this poem. It speaks to me in volumes.

[Divinity Sleeps in This]

Mother-daughter relationships sounds so profound, well done!

[Gregory]

intelligent, love.

[Philip Smith]

I was in the poem, and it flowed well. Nice work Marla

[Coyote Poetry]

I did like the ending. Some advice in life is rated by the person life. A person lost in missed dreams and opportunities can leave you wishing for another path. No weakness in this poem. I like the logic of this amazing poem.
Coyote