Watcher

For Alberts new Ten-word contest, a new form called "The Wave Waltz". Nineteen lines, forming five peaks of 2,3,4,3 and 2 syllables (1,2,1,2,3,2,1,2,3,4,3,2,1,2,3,2,1,2,1,) Challenging and fun!

The Watcher

 

 WAVES

 Rolling

 In

 To DIE

 Placidly

 On the

 Beach....

 

 WHEELING

 Far AWAY

 A brace of CLOUDS--

 Free of EARTH,

 For now...

 

 Old

 IDEAS

 Make no SENSE;

 DISTANCE

 Called,

 But I

 SAT...

 

mark

March 9, 2010

Reviews

[Tate Morgan]

Thats a mathematical night mare to compose yet it lends to you practice controlling syllable count and fitting stories together

[Bubo]

Intriguing wave waltzer! I enjoyed the visual stimulation you created and the final verse, old ideas.........always better to have new ones and move on.

[Cherrie]

those contests are never easy, but you make it look like it is

[Abigail T]

Wow! What a neat idea! I love the feel of it and the flow. Wonderful imagery and sounds. It was fun to read aloud. Greta job!

[An owl on the moon]

I love the feel this gives one reading it.. the sense of waves moving on and on.. dying on the shore.. endlessly.. like life, things keep moving forward.. You made such a world with those ten chosen words!

[Miss Coral]

Ah, I love this. Great imagery, that convey a wonderful use of emotion. Excellent piece in a difficult format. :)

[Ruth]

I like this a lot:) The strucutre is inrteresting to me and thoughtfully executed:) Poppy xx