Defloration

The concept came from a Vietnam era TV show, where Malcolm Jamal Warner, as a gung-ho new 1st Lieutenant, learns first-hand he has no inkling of what war really is. He said, "I just feel like such a fool!" His Master Sergeant chuckles and says, "Son, befo

DEFLORATION

Before our first Firefights,
        We were all Fools:
Having seen Toolboxes
        We assumed we know tools;

Having had hard-ons,
        We presumed we knew hearts
Having given no quarter,
        We consumed life by Quarts!

But now life is upon me,
        And how shall I cope?
Since previously,
        I've been naught but a Dope!!

I've avoided dealing with
        Love's weirdness, Life's rules
By self-sequestration
        In locked, loveless schools---

But, before our first Firefights,
        WEREN'T WE ALL FOOLS?

May 16, 1989

Author's Note

I know "naught but a dope" is weak, but I couldn't find an adequate rhyme for cope; suggestions?

Reviews

[LSS]

Loved this, one of the best I've read. You are very good. I really like your work, I'm glad you knocked on my door, I'd almost given up hope that there were good writers that didn't need to be love sick, nor maudlin, pinning about some emotional trauma. That were writing some real 'Guy' stuff. Maybe you aren't as good as I think, and I'm just starved for humor with black and white stripes. And the 'dope' thing isn't weak, it looks right on. You needed an appropriate response for you inability to cope, and you were it. Thanks again.
Lar

[emmajoy]

Seems things are never quite what we think .. and when we think we know answers, well now .. topsy-turvy land appears.
You wrote this way back, seems pointless to suggest, 'mope', lope, rope .. could be worked in .
Thought I'd reviewed all or certainly most of your posts .. better look harder, longer!

[.n.]

This is great...so much truth here. I don't think "naught a dope" is weak here, it seems consistent with the speaker's voice to me.

[Becky C Strukamp]

More refreshing writing to south our inner child. Loved it!

[Rick Puetter]

Dear Mark,

Yep! Bang on! We have to be so wary of our preconceptions and any zealotry that might be based on them. Usually in life it takes nothing short of a "firefight" to snap us out of previous convictions and show us another way. The secret is to hold all convictions a bit suspect and to proceed cautiously.

Regarding the rhyme with "cope", you might try working in "hope", e.g., "I was lost without hope!" Not too much, unfortunately, rhymes with "cope". So maybe changing "cope" would widen up the possibilities.

Best regards,

Rick