[untitled]

I cant wait for the day when the towel that he gave me because I liked it, is just a towel

the Carhartt sweater he bought me for our first Christmas, so I wouldn't steal his, is just a sweater

the throw blanket that he bought me for our second Christmas, is just a blanket

and the more hurt that he has given me in a year and seven months, 

than anyone has ever given me in a single lifetime, is just a lesson.

Reviews

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
Although quite different from the poems I usually read I really did like yours.
I do think however that if you broke up the lines it would actually be a poem instead on a paragraph... Hope you know what I mean...
I added punctuation and added a word (more)
I believe by breaking it up it is easier to read and very effective...
Hope you are okay with this...
Oh and you could call it THE LESSON...

Lisa

For example:

I can't wait for the day
when the towel that he gave me because I liked it, is just a towel ...
the Carhartt sweater he bought me for our first Christmas,
so I wouldn't steal his, is just a sweater ...
the throw blanket that he bought me for our second Christmas,
is just a blanket ...
and, the more hurt
that he has given me in a year and seven months,
more than anyone has ever given me in a single lifetime,
is just a lesson.

[Green]

I both agree and disagree with the comments about the form. Part of me likes that the lines are a little bit longer because it makes each one feel like a tiny story and it really fit with the idea that each item you were mentioning had a specific memory attached to it. On the other hand, shorter lines are a slightly more traditional format for poems and are usually my preference. Ultimately it just depends what you yourself like best and how it best says what you want it to say.
I related to this a lot though and even though you called out your specific things, I found my mind kind of wandering to what those things and memories would be with me. I too have songs or items or sensations that can immediately take me back vividly to a moment. They do fade with time, and sometimes that's a good thing and sometimes it isn't. The good thing for sure is that the feelings get less intense with time and it's easier to sit back and appreciate the memory as a memory and not as an overwhelming rush of emotions.

[lost and alone]

thank you so much for your insight! it means a lot