Samurai's Fall

 

Cry while you have tears

Mourn my departure tonight  

 

Surrender your faith

 

When the spring comes tomorrow

 

Oh my fearless samurai

Author's Note

This is not Haiku it is Tanka a Japanesse poetry dates back almost 1200 years ago.

Reviews

[Imara]

I love the piece overall, as this is my first time reading a Tanka (though I am familiar with it in the formatting sense) I shall do my best. I read this almost as a conversation between the samurai who is going to leave off to battle for his lord in the spring and talking about it with his wife. With the first 4 lines being him, and the last line being her reply.
You did a great job sticking to the form! Finding great words that fit the form and make it flow. Much respect to that. My favorite line, "Surrender your faith" Good job!

[Frieda P]

Strong Tanka for a brave warrior...nicely pen'd Marc.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Hai Frie domo arigato :) I will give you a hot mushroom soup for this. lol but you are far lol.

[Frieda P]

Yay. :-) My pleasure sir.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

:)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

This is nice. According to the police, it follows the 5-7-5-7-7 format. I also have one (Rain). Congrats, kabayan. Hehe.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Lol :) thanks Tanka Police you have a new badge now, thanks Dhaye glad to have you here always support me. :)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

You're always welcome.

[Junert]

It's sweet. Whatever it is.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

It is a about the two warriors the shinobi ninja warrior who invades the camp of samurai but she regrets because the samurai warrior he love is also in this place and she didn't have a choice but to be with his fellow shinobi.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thanks for the reads Sis.

[Junert]

Makes sense, and captivating.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

sorry I am referring for she I hope you wont confused. lol I have a typo

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

It is a about the two warriors the shinobi ninja warrior who invades the camp of samurai but she regrets because the samurai warrior she love is also in this place and she didn't have a choice but to be with her fellow shinobi.

[Junert]

It's perfectly clear.

[Ency Bearis]

meaningful Tanka with significance, nice write

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thanks Ency, I know you are great in Japs Poetry just bear with me :) lol