Magical Reality

A sad reflection of my life.

 

 

Gushing passion colors the canvas

Giving breath to the voluptuous mermaid

Paints her soul in a cerulean sea

Glistening flaccid pearls surrounded her body

Golden sinuous hair crown the dazzling likeness

Each brush expands the splendor  

Giving life to the sea urchins and hippocampus

A castle of promise painted with love

All the things have been created and shaped into life

A magical world under the sea

But I am sad; all creation eternally happy except me

In reality, I am the painter of this ingenious artwork.

 

 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Trigorin]

Not bad. The last two lines give this a very poignant touch which is nice, but I'd be careful not to go overboard on the description in this - it's very rich, almost too rich in some places. I personally would have liked to have seen a little simpler language here and there, with the great imagery you have as bursts of color in the piece, instead of being its entire substance. Everything in moderation.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thanks Tri, a word from you is always a treasure, thanks a lot.

[Leigh]

Nice ending where you are the creator, did you paint that? It's very good! I think creating something beautiful is a part of a persons life and not separate and so will enrich their life in some way even if they don't get any direct satisfaction from it. To be as lucky as our fantasy creations can only be a dream.

[Rhianne Ney]

A castle of promise painted with love

All the things have been created and shaped into life

A magical world under the sea

But I am sad; all creation eternally happy except me

In reality, I am the painter of this ingenious artwork.

_Great and well thought of lines_

I wanted the way you use imagery and words containing hidden meanings.
Great job

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

I am just writing for a month and no background in the world of poetry. Hope you will always share your wisdom and correct my mistakes as I need it to solidify my dreams to write. Thank you, I love you all.

[Strawberry]

Another great poem. What I liked about this, is that it was totally different to the other one I just read of you. You are very good at creating totally different tones to suit the type of poem.
The imagery is beautiful, as with most of your poems, and I really enjoyed reading it. It almost made me long for it to be real - like the guy painting the picture.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thanks Straw your words is always an inspiration. Thanks a lot.

[Daniel Malone]

Really nice! I actually have to respectfully disagree with Trigorin. I thought the rich description was very effective. Normally I would agree, but in this case I thought the language added to the over all effect. The description fully drew the reader (at least this one) into the scenery. The ending, as a result, came as an unexpected twist. Also, it is important to remember that we are dealing with a painter. Painters pay very close attention to detail. As a result, I think this piece was made more effective because of the descriptive nature of the language. Very good work!

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thanks Daniel for a wonderful review you are 100% correct with regards to the nature of this piece, I appreciate your review thanks a lot brother.

[Dakshta]

A beautiful writing...just one question, if the painting is so alive then why is the painter sad?

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

This painting it is a reflection of my sad life, just like a painting, in real life I am doing my best to give my family a better life back home in the Philippines, but I can't be with them, because I am here in the middle east working and living alone. In painting the painter can paint a lot of beautiful images like the one I illustrate the magical kingdom under the sea but the painter can't be there to be with this beautiful magical realm. So it is a magical reality the painter is sad even he created a beautiful realm but he can't be with that world.

[Dakshta]

The painter can't be in the beautiful realm right now but he surely would get the chance to get in that world soon and then he will become a part of that painting making it even more beautiful :)

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thanks :)

[Deidre]

Wow! this was Definitely Mind provoking.I had never given much thought to the fact that although, as poets, we can create happiness, we can never really apply it in our real lives. I always felt that when I write, thats how I make my life happy.Great work!

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thanks Deidre :) thank you for the wonderful words, I really appreciate your review.

[Aellø]

Amazing, simply beautiful :)

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Hi Aello thanks a lot for the review, I appreciate it always. :)

[Mike Emil]

artists aren't s'posed to be happy
get over it

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Lol very true :) thanks for dropping Mike.

[Ency Bearis]

Great write, such a fantasy well pictured in words and poetized.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Thank you for the kind words :)

[Ency Bearis]

You're welcome, walang ano man.

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

:) Thanks Kabayan