when will freedom come

a little one about just the bare minimum of whats going on in the world today

So much hating playing games

Picturesque lives held in frames

While we keeep on stomping through black and white film rolls

Its history repeating ,..a story never to be told

How is this fair to be held captive in a world of lies

Told all our lifetime society rules untill we hear childrens cries

Where are the ones holding out hands

To help one another in heart wrenchingly desperate lands

Where is the justice for punishment based on media lies

You look away when the broken ones stare into your eyes

Lifes just to good for you to be giving a thought for screwed up systems

Like poverty,wars for oil,aids,starvation,men beating women and land mine victims

How can we sleep when outside our windows

Are the ones in need of help ,their just lost souls

How can we justfy not coming together when changes must be made

This is not just a moment,for these nightmare moments will never fade

If we don’t stand up and speak our minds

Peace and love in this world we shall never find

Author's Note

this is more of a message, do you think what im trying to express through it is coming acrosds clear enough?

Reviews

[An owl on the moon]

So powerful! The images reflective of the old war stories relating to scenes today... Your poetry so vividly connects us to the destruction and the despair of war, and famine, and disease. Glad that you give us insight into what we must do. Thank you so much!

[Pakino]

It does sound a bit like a lecture. BUT what you are doing is just stating the facts. To many people what you wrote is obvious. Work in between the lines to dig deeper, try to understand the WHY and WHAT. :)

[A.T.B.]

The message is clear, but it sounds like a lecture, or a rant. Some might see it as a series of platitudes. I saw that you played a bit with the sentence structure making its stylistics a bit refined. My suggestion is to reinforce the imagery. Try to show more than tell. This is just my honest and humble opinion ... :-)