Oakvale

Oakvale

A Poem by maiism
"

Short and sappy, good for the hopeless romantic types

"
Golden ocean, of straw
I see you resting �" eternity, soft and perfect
Caressed by dawn’s warm glory
Blending with the sun above
And land below
Like a painting, nestled in
The glow of your soft, petal like skin


© 2010 maiism


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Reviews

I like this. It's says so much in so little, so very niiice detail!!

Posted 14 Years Ago


Aww, this is really sweet... I like the line "eternity, soft and perfect" best.

The last line, I think you'd probably want to write "petal-like". Otherwise, everything's really well-written -- the metaphors are touching. :)

Posted 14 Years Ago



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115 Views
2 Reviews
Added on May 4, 2010
Last Updated on May 4, 2010

Author

maiism
maiism

Calgary , Canada



About
Self proclaimed Pokemon Master Retired Jedi Knight Proud Gryffindor Definitely the cool kid in high school more..

Writing
Unending Unending

A Story by maiism