With an Open heart

My heart remains open

The scars of past love

I have bled a river

To what end I have

The love shall remain

The pain of loving you

Even today it remains

You walked like a demon

From the crime you committed

The blood you spilled

Ripping my heart apart

Falling into darkness

Forever encapsulated by you

Banished from the that plain

Removed from those dreams

Torn and ripped apart

Shredded upon the floor

I shall still wait for it

My heart will always be open

Reviews

[Maja]

Hi! I liked the first six lines, but I will be honest - I thought the rhyme scheme of the poem will be the same as, well, the first six lines. I like the idea of the poem, I can actually visualize the blood red scene here, but it doesn't feel smooth. You just need to reword the way the rest of the lines are written, follow the first couple and make sure it flows :) Best of luck and thank you for giving me the opportunity to read this! ^_^

[Michael Wright]

Thank you for your feedback

[Kerry Kane]

I too, liked the imagery, but something abut the flow didn't quite work for me. It almost felt like there were a few lines omitted perhaps.

[Michael Wright]

Thank you for the feedback

[dan]

Wow, THAT'S going to leave a mark! Most of us have been down that road of destruction with our bodies and mind splayed open, hoping that the winds of change will bring rain to wash away the gory remnants of a crash-and-burn love gone BOOM. In time the wind softens and a gentle breeze brings healing and the need to move forward without looking back. A very open and heartfelt write, my compliments! take care...dan

[Michael Wright]

Thank you for the feedback Dan

[silent poet]

Very nice poem ............

[Michael Wright]

Thank you for your feedback

[MsJewel]

The heart wants what the heart wants -
I could feel the emotion in your words.. Great writing.

Julie

[Michael Wright]

Yes at times the Heart wants it cant have

[jacob erin-cilberto]

amazing how now matter how much someone might hurt us, our love for that person refuses to die....even as our heart is bleeding to death, we still hold onto that love.

can feel the conflict in this one, deeply.

[Michael Wright]

Thank you for your feedback
I agree with you on your comments