I'm Not Ready

You were never there when I was small

So I built up all these invisible walls

You probably think I don’t love you

When I really don’t know how to be around you

You've put me down too many times before

So it comes naturally for me to be defensive

 

Every time I walk by

I notice the way you look at me

Inside I want to cry

I don’t want to change

Unless the decision is free

Unless the decision is mine

I know I’m who I’m supposed to be

Can’t you open your eyes and see?

 

We never seem to agree

I don’t want to hurt you

But you make it hard… not to

I only want you to accept me

No matter what happens or what I do

At first I thought you disliking me was cool

I know now that I was a fool

I truly long for you to be there for me

But I still can’t let you go there

I’m not ready for you and me

 

Every day it gets even harder

To look you in the eye

I try with all my heart

And you still don’t know the real me

All I have left is to sigh

And I carry on being myself, and being free

If you only see failure

We’ll have no future

 

We never seem to agree

I don’t want to hurt you

But you make it hard… not to

I only want you to accept me

No matter what happens or what I do

At first I thought you disliking me was cool

I know now that I was a fool

I truly long for you to be there for me

But I still can’t let you go there

I’m not ready for you and me

 

It seems you just don’t understand

Who I am or what I want to do

I won’t give you my hand

You’ll just turn it to goo

It doesn't matter what you think

It won’t bother me anymore

Inside we’re both pink

There are no more tears to pour

 

We never seem to agree

I don’t want to hurt you

But you make it hard… not to

I only want you to accept me

No matter what happens or what I do

At first I thought you disliking me was cool

I know now that I was a fool

I truly long for you to be there for me

But I still can’t let you go there

I’m not ready for you and me

 

Reviews

[Bhumika Devkota]

Great poem! You can tell that your pour your feelings to it:)

[Maddy]

Thank you very much! Appreciated! Always insecure about my poems so this is the first time ever that I am posting them as well. Most I wrote when I was much younger but I have been writing again so really thank you!