Blood In Your Coffee

I want you to be the next to know

My f*****g secrets.

Sit down, look up, look at the floor-

Just- lets.

I want you to be the next to see my chaos.
I'm going to cut myself open,

Flesh for you to see, taste, and store, for a later date.
Your fridge is passion, not like many other's hate.

Preserve my happiness and my pain..?

I sit in my chair,You're at the edge of your seat.
Never was history so suspenseful, 
What a f*****g feat-
I guess it's just mine.

I want you to drink your coffee,
Work up the nerve to tell me to stop,
Gushing, loving, breathing, bleeding,
So that I can clot, before the beating,
You're f*****g screaming...
Can you just NOT?

Now, this has been my seat for a long time, in this café.
People come and go, but the table always stays.
Some, walk by me, some actually sit down.
But I've never met someone who really wants to stick around.
Pull up a chair, I won't lie..
I've perpetuated one too many, and now I wanna die.

See these scars on my wrists? Over the tendons and veins.
The big one there is from a real bad day.
You think you're scared? God, if I could even say,
These words on my mind...
I can only express myself with oh, so few..
I don't have a good way with them,
Because this is serious, and I never knew...

I want someone to look at me,
Not with anger or rage,
Soul sucking favoritism in favor of being caged,
High f*****g value placed on mainstream-made,
I want a world without labels, a world without shame...
Sorry, not sorry, I was born this way...
Hey!
Where do you think you're going,
Trying to leave?
That's fine, you don't owe me...
I just think you should know-
You've got blood in your coffee.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

As I just wrote on a different dreary poem, a minute ago – what I hate are dreary poems that sound like a mindless dump of yukkiness – this poem is NOT that. Here you’ve crafted this load of yukky feelings into interesting, clever, & dynamic packages, then you tease us with distribution of details. I love the way your poem does a “play” on coffee and being here at “the café” – I love the way your descriptions could be about a real café in the flesh, or being here where people virtually pass us by or maybe take a bite now & then, etc. It’s all total clever idea crafting! So even if your message is bleak, your writing is quite remarkable & I applaud you (even tho you are correct in guessing that I won’t be back often for another load of well-crafted bleakness! *wink! wink!*) Fondly, Margie

[alienated.aquarius]

wow this is really good, i love the spite and how its so visual, sorry i'm not very good at critiquing work but this would make a good slam poem!

[Indra's Child]

Thank you, you don't have to be 'good' at critiquing. I just appreciate you, Booop
LM

[Chris Shaw]

This is an intense piece of writing, really packs a punch and makes the reader sit up. I know one or two young people who have felt just like that, really struggled with life, every aspect of it going through their painful adolescence, and self harming. Want to know what happened? They got through it ok, and look back on it now, so pleased that they made it through the wilderness. Excellent expression in your lines. You conveyed your pain to this reader.

Boop boop

Chris

[Onlyme]

Intense is an understatement in this poem. Wow this screams, shouts and kicks and f*****g pulls no punches.... direct, raw and gritty. bites you and leaves you screaming..

[Indra's Child]

I love your word usage here, lol for real.
Thank you for reviewing my work.
I appreciate it lots.
Boop,
LP
(the LysergicidalManiac)

[Zayir]

As someone that was diagnosed with clinical depression at the age of 13 (tried to commit suicide at that age). I can say that this is very intense. True words. Sometimes you just want to scream at the f*****g world. Love this. Keep it up!
Much love

[Indra's Child]

Thank you so much for your review.
It's hard to go through this stuff. Makes it easier knowing that you're not the only one. I'm sorry you went through that.
Boop boooop (and good vibes,)
Lysergic Pancakes

[Dara]

Super intense. Good work.

[Indra's Child]

Thank you so much for your review!
Boop
I actually really appreciate it.
Lp
read moreThank you so much for your review!
Boop
I actually really appreciate it.
Lp