One of Us

Maybe a catalyst for a novella, this story documents a new addition to a traveling freak show who becomes witness to the emotional struggles of others, while also dealing with his own sordid secret.

Brian

hey sexy. miss me?

+++ ++, ++++; 11:26 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

Hey, stud ;) Long day! What’s up?

+++ ++, ++++; 11:26 PM Salem, OR

Brian

Nothing

+++ ++, ++++; 11:28 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

Did you go to the gym today?

+++ ++, ++++; 11:29 Salem, OR

Brian

yeah. my arms are really sore

+++ ++, ++++; 11:31 Tampa, FL

Brian

I just came back from the beach. I went surfing

+++ ++, ++++; 11:31 Tampa, FL

Erika

Ohh, lol. Sexy! I need to work on my tan

+++ ++, ++++; 11:31 Salem, OR

Brian

your beautiful baby. When are we gonna webcam? I want to see your beautiful face in person

+++ ++, ++++; 11:32 Tampa, FL

Erika

It’s still broken :( Sorry baby. Next time; promise!

+++ ++, ++++; 11:32 Salem, OR

Sunday

I rolled down the window as I lurched out of the grass parking lot of the carnival, turning left onto the main road. The dried pus in between the breaks in my palms clicked against the steering wheel as I turned it, and it made an unnerving scratch as I relaxed my palms to let the wheel spin back in place. I should have brought my wool gloves with me, I thought to myself.

        Russ, the Human Geek, reclined the passenger seat almost as far as it could go and spread his legs, as far as they could stretch and as wide as the passenger seat would allow, letting his legt leg rest against the automatic stick shift.

        “Oregon, huh,” He took a deep inhale, breaking the ice, “You know, I expected Salem to be all gloomy and whatever. This place is Beaver Cleaver suburbs.” I exhaled a scoff of amusement; I could see it. The sky was a clear blue, the sun shone warmly and the grass, which was plenty, glowed a bright pastel green. Everything had a very clean, environmental look.

“What kind of car is this?” Russ asked conversationally. He stretched his pursed mouth, rimmed with the tattoos of large, tombstone teeth, wide and raised his eyebrows, which were replaced with small metal spikes implanted underneath the skin, as he mundanely looked around, from the fuzzy, gray roof, to the indented armrest compartment which, from the pressure of my elbow resting on it in too many temperature extremes, was almost as lined with open cracks as the skin of my body, to the unremarkable stereo system, with its standard CD player and multitude of adjustment buttons and cranks.

“It’s a Nissan Versa,” I blandly replied, turning my head after I said it to give Russ a quick profile as his bare torso, only covered by a pair of worn, brown suspenders, was available to admire, and so close. He was slim, had a soft, rubbery stomach, like runny cookie dough, and was completely overtaken with tattoos. He had no natural pigmentation left on any part of his body, he had told me, which had got me immediately thinking about… “those” areas. Russ’ body was a tapestry of white skeleton bones against black; a traditional work of a Japanese geisha donned in a brilliant blue and purple kimono lining the left side of his torso and sporting a yellow Spring umbrella; and popular cartoon characters like Spongebob Squarepants, Scooby Doo and the Mystery Inc. kids, Ariel the mermaid and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which were sporadically printed on his arms, back and stomach which, was worth mentioning, was riddled with raw, blackened pink holes from the many times he had stuck kebob skewers through his flesh and lit the jutted tips on fire. His n*****s were pierced three times over with a silver orb in the center, a captive ring surrounding over the orb, and a barbell pierced through the captive ring horizontally. Who was I to judge; I was disgusted, but… curious.

I caught Russ’ dyed green eye (the other, dyed yellow) as I looked up from his body. He sniffed comfortably, turned to face me and licked his lips. His tongue gauge clicked melodically against the many hoop rings piercing the complete expanse of his bottom, as well as top, lip. Even against the sounds shooting at me from the open window, the wind, the revving from the other vehicles driving around us, and the cry of the odd bird cawing into my ear, when he put his tongue back in his mouth, I heard his tongue gauge subtly click against his vertical labret. His arms hung slack at his sides. Russ grinned; his teeth were pointed in slim, sharp needles, like a demonic snake. I heard the low clink of his mouth gauges clicking against each other.

“How ya liking the carnie life?”

I smiled and nodded, genially, “I like it a lot. Everyone’s really nice.”

“Yeah, what’s that thing you have again?”

“Harlequin Ichthyosis.”

Russ nodded slowly, facing forward; his skull, dyed completely black, glowed white from the sun beaming down on it. I could tell that he had no idea what Harlequin Ichthyosis was. He slapped his hands on the thighs of his green khakis and stretched them forward, smoothing out the creases in a slow, methodical trail.

I slowed the car down gently at a stop sign and slowly took a right. “It’s a genetic disorder. My skin grows really thick, really fast. Before I decided to grow my skin out I had to take six baths a day with, ah, one of those abrasive shower towels, then I had to put a lot of lotion and Vaseline on my body to hydrate it. I still use the lotion-”

“Yeah.”

“- but I only shower twice a day now. That’s why my skin’s breaking more and more.”

“Oh.” Russ nodded his head and furrowed his brow, peering at the cracks in my hand. He wasn’t saying anything, though.

“Yeah, and the skin’s growing past the cracks now. That’s why they’re overlapping and looking like scales.” I looked over at him, my right wrist rested at the top of the steering wheel, my left holding the bottom of the wheel, slack, “How did you become a geek?”

Russ cracked a grin - clink - and rubbed his chin. He lifted himself a little out of his seat, and began to bob in time with the vibration of the car buffering against the wind.

“I’m a Buddhist, man.”

He started as if that simple explanation would make sense. He raised his hands in front of him as if he was stating a frank confession and slapped them on his pants again. I cracked a sideways grin at him and perked an eyebrow to signal that I was listening.

“I got into Buddhism a few years ago. Then I started reading up on all of the monks in the Himalayas and really got into what they were doing. I always liked pain, too. Always, I was cutting myself just to taste my own blood; stick pin needles in my face, walk up to my mom like I was Hellraiser, freak her out. My mom was a strict Mormon. She always was trying to get me to do baseball, Boy Scouts, cotillion, all of that. Anyway, reading about the monks really got me into the Zen thing and I really found my center, and I was able to go further and further with what I was doing, like sticking all this s**t in my body. If I can make an easy buck doing what I love and, you know, I’m kind of a show off, too,” he chuckled, “Yeah, Tumberlina found me through my video snorting matchstick flames through my nose on YouTube and she offered me a job as a carnie here for a dope wage - and I get to travel?” Russ let out a slow pshh and shook his head at imagining the irrationality of possibly turning that kind of opportunity down.

“Hey,” he cocked his head towards me, “You mind subscribing to my page and telling all your friends about it? I’m hoping to get noticed and get a TV deal.”

I lifted my head up, raised my eyebrows and pushed my mouth out in an ‘O’. “Ohhh,” I murmured, “Cool.” I licked my lips and tasted the metallic, iron-y flavor of the scabs lining them. “No, I didn’t know you had one. Is that why you always carry your smart phone with you?”

Russ laughed, “Yeah. You gotta make a name for yourself in this business. You need a gimmick, and I totally have that.” He slapped me lightly on the shoulder, “I was gonna cut my tongue in half but that’s definitely yours to claim now.”

I let out a surprised “HAH!” and stretched my mouth out wide nervously, “Oh yeah, I’ve seen that before…” Russ shook his head, “Yup, I’m so disappointed. You see them other guys? When they do it they’re able to move both cut-up sides of their tongues independently from each other?” I laughed at the thought of that.

        “Yeah,” Russ sighed and reclined back in his seat, “I’m gonna be the ultimate freak.” I looked over at him. He was staring straight forward, nodding slowly; eyes glassy and mouth quietly stretched into a manufactured smile. I glanced down and I saw him earnestly playing with his fingers, colored black. They glowed dimly against the sun beaming through the windshield. He squeezed the tip of his ring finger between his thumb and forefinger.

We drove in silence for the next twenty minutes before we finally arrived at the custom metalwork shop.

        Russ popped open the passenger-side door and stepped out onto the parking lot in front of the shop.

        “Thanks, Eric. We’ll be quick.”

Erika

Hey stud ;) What’s up?

+++ ++, ++++; 10:47 PM Salem, OR

Erika

What’s wrong, haha, cat got your tongue?

+++ ++, ++++; 10:55 PM Salem, OR

Brian

hey baby

+++ ++, ++++; 10:58 PM Tampa, FL

Brian

No I could never ignore you. I was thinking about you today.

+++ ++, ++++; 10:59 Tampa, FL

Erika

Awww… I was thinking about you, too. I wished that you were holding me earlier. I got hit on by a gross guy that had tattoos and piercings all over his face. Gross!

+++ ++, ++++; 11:00 PM Salem, OR

Brian

if I was there id kick his a*s. you want me to come? Ill come!

+++ ++, ++++; 11:02 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

Haha, I took care of it. He was a loser. He told me he had his own TV show. I asked him on what channel and he had to think about it. I told him off myself. I only date attractive guys ;)

+++ ++, ++++; 11:04 PM Salem, OR

Brian

speaking of attractive send me a picture of that beautiful body of yours to help me sleep tonight ;D

+++ ++, ++++; 11:06 PM Tampa, FL

Brian

Baby?

+++ ++, ++++; 11:21 PM Tampa, FL

Brian

Sorry if I offended you :( good night. Ill be dreaming of you.

+++ ++, ++++; 11:34 PM Tampa, FL

Tuesday

Spring, the Rubber Girl, yelled at me from over the Versa. “Hey,” she craned her neck over the dusted white roof of the passenger side, palms planted forcefully on either side of herself; her hot pink fingernails pressed against the detail, like claws, “Start the car up and roll down my window. Let me show you something!”

I popped open the driver side door and chuckled, “Oh, god. I know what you’re going to do.”

Spring cocked her head to one side impatiently and I heard the muffled bffm of her foot stomping just as impatiently on the carnival parking lot grass. Her nails scratched backward a little with a rapt grinding. I rolled my eyes as I plopped into the tan, textured driver’s seat and slid my key into the ignition, closing the driver’s door after me. The Versa smoothly revved to life. With eyes wide and my smirk giddy, I turned and looked at Spring through the passenger side window. Her brunette pigtails, which were slim and splayed high and directly horizontal of her head, like Pippy Longstockings, swung freely as she vigorously nodded for me to follow her lead.

I turned the other way and looked down at the map of buttons connected to my door, and, with a black woolen-gloved finger, pressed down the button corresponding with the passenger side window. Spring’s leg was up and into the car before the passenger side window was finished sliding down.

“Don’t put your foot on my seat!” I quickly shot.

Spring let out a maniacal outburst of glee and dipped her head, followed by her torso, then her arms, which seemed to blossom from the tight spaces in between her thigh and ribcage on one end, and her neck and shoulder on the other, and all began to sinew themselves towards the shadowy crevasse of the passenger seat floor.

I gripped the steering wheel, reflexively, and belted out a quick “Oh my god!” as Spring’s other leg, toe pointed gracefully like a ballerina, slid serpentine through the window and joined the writhing mass of body parts at the floor of my passenger seat. I could see joints twisting and unhinging. I recoiled, my head shrinking into my shoulders as, unexpectedly, Spring’s grinning face appeared swinging through, to face me, from underneath two shifting limbs, her left calf and right forearm, as they slid away from each other.

Sputtering out an uncomfortable guffle, I grabbed the stick shift and cranked it down to ‘drive.’ As I pulled out of the grassy parking lot of the carnival grounds and took a left onto the main road, out of the corner of my eye saw Spring, still giggling, slither, hands crushed against the driver’s side door reservoir and the edge of the seat cushion, into the passenger seat. She rested her legs on the seat, tucked horizontally in front of her, catlike, and delicately rested her left elbow on the armrest compartment.

“That was fun,” she grinned, winking at me.

I shook my head and raised my eyebrows in incredulation. I gave a tsk. Spring slapped her other arm on her leg and declared, “Alright, let’s go get tampons!” She raised her fists high in the arm and swung them forcefully. She flapped an arm out of the window and waved it wildly, “Wooooo! I’m BLEEDING out my snatch!” she screamed.

As we drove past our first stop sign, the midday sun blinding us to pull down our sun visors, Spring, with a bored sigh, kicked her legs up and cross them in front of her on the dashboard. “So!” she started, snapping her head towards me, lifting her shirt over her navel to play with her crimson navel ring, “How old are you?” I smiled and slightly turned sideways at her, “Ah, I’m twenty-two. You?” Spring gasped, “Ohhh, you’re young. I don’t know,” she grinned, “Guess!” I gave her a quick profile and hummed dutifully; I didn’t want to seem apathetic. As policy, I lowballed what I was actually thinking. “Twenty-six?” Spring gave another spurt of maniacal laughing and shifted herself over to affectionately bump her head on my shoulder, her pigtail lightly digging. “I LOVE you! I’m thirty-four.” She nodded, eyes raised as if she was saying, “ Unbelievable I’m so old, right?” I feigned a surprised “Wow!” and nodded approvingly. “You’ve taken care of yourself!” I shot.

Spring reached over and picked at the “scales” on my arm. “It looks like you’ve been taking care of yourself, too. Your scales are looking more lizard-like. They’re sticking out too much, though.” She spread her palm and lightly pressed her hand on my arm. “You’re still using that disinfectant ointment. I can smell it all over you.” “Yeah,” I said, “I don’t want to get an infection. It’s a lot harder now that I have to apply it under my ‘scales’. And it’s a b***h having to clip them to make the edges look like scales. Otherwise I just look like an armadillo.” Spring reclined back in her seat, “Well, right now you look like a green hedgehog. That paint stained your skin,” she giggled. “Yeah,” I grimaced, “I kind of knew it would.” I forced out a hapless hah. “I can help you apply your paint, if you want,” Spring piped. I shrugged, “Yeah, maybe.”

Spring pulled her legs down and slumped, broken, in her seat. “Who sat in here last?” She shuffled her body, looking around the seat, which was still cranked back all the way and the seat reclined nearly as far back as it would go, at all the space she had available around her. I cracked a grin. “Russ. He made himself right at home.” Spring scoffed.

“Yup. That’s Russ.”

Spring shrugged her shoulders and gave another scoff. “Have you ever seen his pictures before he started transitioning?” I shook my head, turning into the left lane past a slow driver. “He was f****n hot. He had nice blonde hair, blue eyes, a nice tan, a nice build... He looks totally different now. He looked really...” She paused, thinking about it, “He looked really All-American, you know?” Spring shook her head regretfully. “I can do tattoos. If he still looked like he did back then, had a little scruff and had just a few tattoos on his body, mmmm, I would have grinded that pole to a nub...” She kicked her left leg up on the dashboard and lifted, jutting her pelvis out towards me and, grabbing her crotch, started thrusting, fist clenched at her side while making a pumping motion, “Just like that.” I looked over at her snarling face, “Just like this, right.”

“Yup.” I turned back deliberately, stoic. Out of the corner of my eye I could still see her thrusting her pelvis at me.

“He can just do anything to me.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Just stuff that big meat stick in my taco!”

“Gotcha.”

“I wanna give him redwings all over his face right now!”

“Ohmygod!”

I pressed my Blue Croc against the parking break as we slowed to a yellow light about to turn red. I turned towards Spring an incredulous laugh. She gave me a few more thrusts of her pelvis, pink fingernails still digging, then finally lifted her leg down from the dashboard and slumped back in her seat. She lifted her shoulders, perky breasts under her slim-fit pink tanktop rising, presenting, in a dramatic sigh and exclaimed, “I need a cigarette.”

Now that Spring wasn’t blocking the view from her window I was able to look past her to our four neighbors waiting in the other lane - staring straight at us; cracking grins, eyebrows raised, intrigued...

“Dude,” one of the guys, sitting in the back seat behind the driver called as he lifted his sunglasses above his eyes, “Nice mask! Godzilla’s the s**t! Woooo!” Spring immediately sprung up from her seat, scooting up to where her butt was supported by the crevice between the seat and the body of the passenger seat and screamed, “Wooo!” back at the guys, throwing a free fist out of the window. The guys suddenly went wild; The driver shot an arm out of the electric blue Toyota Scion and pointed a finger at her, stabbing it in the air at her. “You!  You!” he screamed at her. The other guys catcalled and whistled at her. The driver quickly shot back in the car and began to quickly manipulate the radio to find a song. Suddenly, “Pour Some Sugar On Me” by Poison began basting from their car, which sent the guys, with their cocked caps, LiveStrong arm bracelets and collared shirts, into a frenzy.

I was about to roll up her window in Spring’s defense, but Spring, with an impish grin already spread across her heart-shaped face, began gyrating halfway out of it, her torso effortlessly rippling dramatically, oscillating in circles in a hypnotizing kaleidoscope of kinetics. “God damn...” I heard of the guys yell from his car. Spring curved towards me and yelled, “Even if the light turns green, don’t go yet!” I looked behind us in the rearview mirror and saw that there were no other cars waiting behind us. The guys, slowly breaking out of their trance, resumed back to their catcalls and whistles; “Yeah, baby!” “Get at this, right here!” and more “Wooo!” could be heard from behind Spring. I could see the small of her back in minute glimpses, her tanktop quickly stretching up and back down with each rotation of her body. What may have been a trick of the light, I thought I saw the bright blush of a red welt slashed across the right side of her back, near her buttocks, peeking in and out from behind the hem of her black tights.

Spring pulled back into the Versa and curled both hands back out of the window. The guys began to plead with her to continue with her show, opening their arms and flapping their hands towards them, beckoning. Spring gave the guys a teasing shrug and began to wave one hand at them. She seductively reached her other hand and caressed the wrist that she was waving with, grabbed it and - violently tore her arm backward! Spring let out a bloodcurdling scream that shook everyone around her, including me, to jump reactively. Both the Versa and the Scion forcefully lurched forward as both drivers’ feet jumped off of the break for a moment before regaining clumsy control again. Spring’s forearm socket jutted out graphically at the Scion. The guys recoiled; their faces twisted in agony, blushing beet red in seconds. They cried out and pushed the air out towards her, rejecting the situation.

Spring continued to scream, tenderly supporting her inverted elbow. Her huffs of agony began to change in pitch, becoming more clipped and quicker in succession. Spring’s hearty laughter, which sounded like an out-of-tune violin string, was bewildering. All of us just stared at her, shocked; mouths unconsciously agape, breathing heavy, panicked. Spring slapped a hand on the car window as she bowed her head, doubled over, as her laughter suddenly became soundless huffing; her face was paralyzed in a cartoonishly stretched grin.

The bulky driver of the Scion was the first to snap back to his bearings.

“You f****n’ sick b***h!” He violently jabbed a finger at her. This rage was obvious behind his reflective sunglasses.

His outburst snapped the others back to the reality of what had just happened. As the blue Toyota Scion angrily screeched to life and rocketed forward, the angry faces of the guys inside pushed forward towards us, yelling back obscenities, slowly drowned out by the rev of the engine and the static hum of the “outside” as the Scion drove farther and farther ahead from us.

“F****n’ freak!”

“You c**t!”

“B***h!”

Spring’s face, which rested on an arm against the open window, suddenly became slack; the red of her laughter earlier suddenly drained. A slight breeze blew through the thin strays of her brunette hair. We were caught in a moment where the light was green. I gently lifted my foot from the break and stepped on the gas. With a simple, contemplative inhale, Spring pulled herself back into the Nissan Versa and reclined back in her seat. As she shuffled to get comfortable in her reclined seat, Spring nonchalantly shot a single word, staring blankly at the roof...

“A******s...”

I grunted in acknowledgement. With a flick of my finger I lifted the passenger side window to combat the smell of burning rubber that was noxiously pushing into the Versa. I looked over at her hesitantly. True to her professional title, Spring the Rubber Girl’s body rested, bent and curved, with no self-support being used in any of her body. She looked as if all the energy had drained out of her. Her face held a subtle contrast, though. Her mouth was pressed in forced monotony, eyebrows raised in fake boredom.

I parked into the nearest parking space I could find at the local Wal-Mart when we arrived seven minutes later. In the parking space directly in front of us, a glowing middle-aged woman, her toddler-aged son bouncing happily in her arms, was returning to her minivan. As she fumbled in her purse to find her keys, her son, who was looking every which way, pointing and laughing at random things, turned towards us as we were unbuckling our seatbelts. We immediately smiled at him. Spring nodded her head downward and began to wave at him. The toddler, who wore blue overalls over a dark orange t-shirt, giggled excitedly and waved back at her, which caught the eye of the mother. Keys in hand, she warmly smiled to her son and raised a friendly wave at Spring, which further encouraged her son.

I could hear their horrified screams through the windshield after Spring violently snapped her elbow backward. Her cackling sounded like an out-of-tune violin string.

Erica

Hey baby! No, I’m not mad, haha. The internet blew out all of yesterday. I’m sorry :( I’ve been working so much lately, and everyone at the firm is driving me crazy! I may be up for a promotion, though :)

+++ ++, ++++, 10:14 PM, Salem, OR

Erika

I’ve actually been thinking...

+++ ++, ++++, 10:15 PM Salem, OR

Erika

When you and I finally meet, I want to grind your pole to a nub ;)

+++ ++, ++++; 10:15 PM Salem, OR

Brian

whoaa! where is this coming from, baby! Not saying I don’t like it, though ;)

+++ ++, ++++; 10:17 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

idk. I just want to see you so bad.

+++ ++, ++++; 10:17 PM Salem, OR

Erika

I didn’t want to talk to you, either, until I was in a better mood. I’ve been on my period and I’ve been feeling like kind of a b***h. I didn’t want to do anything to make you hate me, lol.

+++ ++, ++++; 10:18 PM Salem, OR

Brian

Baby there isnt anything you could do to make me hate you.

+++ ++, ++++; 10:21 PM Tampa, FL

Brian

I LOVE YOU!!!

+++ ++, ++++; 10:21 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

I LOVE YOU, TOO!!! baby. SO much! *kiss*

+++ ++, ++++; 10:22 PM Salem, OR

Erika

I’m already so much in love with you. You’re such a wonderful man and you make me so happy! Hey, I have a busy day tomorrow. I should sleep.

+++ ++, ++++; 10:23 PM Salem, OR

Erika

I LOVE YOU!!!

+++ ++, ++++; 10:23 PM Salem, OR

Brian

I LOVE YOU!!!

+++ ++, ++++; 10:24 PM Tampa, FL

Wednesday

I plugged the auxiliary jack, which winded from the AUX port installed in the car radio, into the jack port at the top of Tumberlina’s black iPad 2. Facing it upward, I gently rested the iPad in the passenger seat. From the nine-inch screen glowed Gram, the Bearded Fat Lady, recorded through her laptop webcam. Gram’s plump face almost filled the entire screen. From her beady, swollen eyes to her small gasping mouth, pushed inward by her massively full cheeks; from the clear nasal cannula hooked around her face, the two valves loosely feeding into her subtly flaring nostrils, to the thick facial hair, more salt than pepper, fluffing out from her sideburns and extending, like slim, crooked tree roots, downward, completely hiding her chin.

Being mindful to turn on the air conditioner instead of rolling down the window, I called out in a loud voice, putting the stick shift into ‘D’ and lightly stepping on the gas.

“Can you hear me alright, Gram?"

Gram’s strained voice wheezed through the car radio.

“Loud and clear, darlin’.”

With every few heavy inhales Gram took, they were followed by the sound of air quickly blowing out of her filled nostrils: pfft. The Versa hummed with the hollow breeze of cold air gently blowing from the air vents, only to be interrupted every few seconds by Gram’s wheezing: pfft… pfft… pfft… I crossed the grassy carnival parking lot and, after cautiously pausing to flip my head left and right, took a left onto the main road.

“How are you surviving the carnie life?” Gram’s voice strained through the speaker system.

“I like it,” I exaggerated a big smile and raised my eyebrows as I knelt my head downward towards the iPad. I didn’t know if the camera could see me; it was probably recording straight up at the car roof, but I’m very gentle with elders. “I’ve been here almost a week and I can, yeah, I can tell that I’m going to enjoy myself. It’s just hard adjusting to changing my skin look more like a lizard. It takes a lot of work.” I pushed out a genial chuckle.

I slapped the sun visor back up on the roof and took a right at a stop sign. I had passed these residential housings before; the tall, wooden picket fences separated the neighborhoods with the main road, an opening into each neighborhood unit only showing up every forty feet or so. The gray sidewalk stretched alongside the road, sparse traces of the neighborhood children left behind in the form of chalk-drawn hopscotch boxes and Converse All-Stars hung, strung over the telephone wires above us.

Gram exhaled another pfft and asked, “Do you know where the library is?”

I gave a large nod and loudly replied, “Yeah, I passed by it on Tuesday.” “Oh, when you took Spring to the store?” Gram opened her mouth after she finished, the suction of her lips pulling over her gums making a loud schlick, and gave another exhale - pfft. “Yes, ma’am.” " pfft " We passed a woman wearing a black sun visor, a hot pink plain t-shirt, like the kind you would get at a crafts store, tan khaki soccer shorts and short boyish haircut, like Donny Osmond, pushing along a baby stroller along the sidewalk to my left. Gram’s huffing seemed intent, as if she was invested.

“How is she?”

I cocked my brow and thinned my lips. “I’m sorry?”

“How’s Spring? How is she?”

I opened my mouth, shrugged, and closed it again in one smooth motion. We passed a green stop light. “She’s good, I guess. I don’t really know her. She seems like a lot of fun, though.” I gave an uncomfortable laugh, “She’s really out of control.”

“Yeah, that’s my daughter,” Gram mused, passively amused.

I let out a loud gasp, audible enough for Gram to hear it.

“Yep,” Gram acknowledged, chuckling, “Spring is mine. She’s certainly a wild one.” Pfft “She was such a good little girl when she was little. I had her late, and my thyroid started acting up the same time I hit menopause" pfft "- so when she was young I started gaining all this weight and she had to take care of me early on because I was bedridden with depression, too. The doctors have always given me steroids to get my appetite up; that’s how I got the beard.” Gram laughed. “Lemons.” Pfft.

I stayed quiet. I was still trying to take in everything that she was telling me. It was " unique," her story. I noticed that she was finished speaking. I quickly thought up something, anything, to ask. Her breathing was disconcerting now.

“Do you have any other kids?”

“No,” Gram shot, “Spring’s father walked out before she was born. Pfft. I didn’t have anyone to work on anymore after her.” Gram chuckled, “I had a boyfriend for a few years, but he got arrested when Spring was fourteen.” Gram’s voice sounded uncomfortable at the mention of that. “Anyway, ‘Gram’ is a wish fulfillment, I guess. Pfft. Unless Spring can get her act together well enough to find a husband and adopt, ‘Gram’s’ just a name.”

I furrowed my brow, confused, “Adopt?”

“Oh,” Gram quipped, “Spring can’t have children.”

“Oh!” I regretted inquiring, “I’m sorry.”

Gram’s breathing became even heavier. I figured that she was shrugging her shoulders. “Thank you, darlin’, for driving ‘me’ to the library.” She gave a small, throaty chortle.

“Oh, no,” I shook my head vigorously, smiled, “It’s no problem at all.”

“I didn’t like books until later, later, on. I love reading now. I found a book my ex-husband accidently left one day. I read it and thought ‘that wasn’t too bad,’ so I used to send Spring to the library with the neighbor to pick out other books I wanted from the Reader’s Digest.” Gram paused; pfft, “That’s mostly what I do these days: entertain, and read.”

I cocked my head sideways, flashing to the iPad screen. “What about Spring?”

Gram grunted nonchalantly. “Spring has her own life she’s working out,” she said plainly, “She still takes care of me; gives me my medical supplies, gives me baths, makes sure I’m fed but…” she trailed off. “Do you read any?”

I sighed, reminiscing, “I used to, a lot. But I’m taking online courses and I don’t have time to read for fun. I’m just always studying, if I’m not performing, too.”

“Your scales look better! You’re going to make a good lizard boy. Tumberlina’s said a lot of good things about you. She loves you, darlin’.” I could hear Gram smiling through the speaker system.

I smiled. “Thanks, Gram.”

We took a right at an empty four-way and pulled into the library parking lot. It was empty, save for a green Chevrolet parked at the far end of the lot. Probably a janitor, I thought. I let out a small groan of disappointment as I parked into the first parking space closest to the library entrance.  “Gram,” I began, as I put the car into ‘P’, pulled out the keys and opened my door, “I don’t think the library’s open.”

“Oh, no?”

I grabbed Tumberlina’s iPad and unplugged the auxiliary cable from it. With a woolen hand I pulled it out of the Versa with me. I held it out in front of me, screen facing, scanning, the empty parking lot. Giving the iPad a small grunt of affirmation, I turned and moved towards the library entrance, just to make extra sure that this wasn’t a fluke. I made my way to the library entrance sliding double-doors: WE WILL BE CLOSED WEDNESDAY, +++ ++, DUE TO MAINTANACE. I held the iPad towards the sign then turned the iPad screen back towards me.

A single tear, glowing white from whatever was being reflected on Gram’s laptop screen, rolled down her meaty cheek and attached itself and connected a watery bridge between her cheek and her nasal cannula.

“It’s alright, darlin’.” Gram shrugged, beaming warmly. “Come back. I’ll pay you the gas money.”

Brian

Hey baby. i love you.

+++ ++, ++++; 10:22 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

Hey baby! I love you, too!!!

+++ ++, ++++ 10:23 PM Salem, OR

Erika

Baby, what’s your favorite book?

+++ ++, ++++ 10:24 PM Salem, OR

Brian

I dont read

+++ ++, ++++ 10:26 PM Tampa, FL

Brian

hahaha!

+++ ++, ++++ 10:26 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

Haha

+++ ++, ++++ 10:27 PM Salem, OR

Erika

Baby, come to Salem. Just come.  They’re opening a carnival here on Friday. Do you think you could fly down here and we can meet there? If you do, I’m going to jump into your arms and you have to kiss me!

+++ ++, ++++ 10:29 PM Salem, OR

Brian

Okay

+++ ++, ++++ 10:31 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

… Really? Please don’t tease me. My heart can’t take it :( I love you so much.

+++ ++, ++++ 10:32 PM Salem, OR

Brian

Im not kidding baby. Ill come to salem on friday.

+++ ++, ++++ 10:33 PM Tampa, FL

Erika

I think I’m going to cry :,D Meet me next to the sideshow tent at 8, okay?

+++ ++, ++++ 10:35 PM Salem, OR

Erika

REALLY!?!?!?

+++ ++, ++++ 10:35 PM Salem, OR

Brian

Really. i love you!!!

+++ ++, ++++ 10:37 PM Tampa, FL

Thursday

I slammed the trunk door closed, now filled with whatever was strewn around my back seat, to make room for Nick & Kita, the Siamese Twins. As I walked past them on the way towards the driver’s side door I ask, “Do you guys need help buckling your seat belt or anything?” Nick scoffed, flipped his head to the side and jugged out his bottom lip like an ape.

“Oh, yeah,” he teased, “way to make us feel handicapable. Don’t you know, never ask a deformed person if they need help.”

“Yeah!” his sister peeped, her frilly mini-dress sticking out around her upper thighs like an upside-down cupcake.

“I don’t need your help,” Nick sneered at Kita, stretching out the creases of his loose tuxedo. Kita tsked and rolled her eyes.

The twins, Nick to the left, and Kita to the right, were slim, had heads shaped like eggs, with dowry eyes, and were awkwardly fused at the sternum in a place so that they were constantly pivoted towards each other, like two nestled turtle doves. As I popped open the Versa’s driver’s seat door and plopped into my seat, I glanced into my sideview mirror and watched Nick & Kita reach their unusually long arms around each other’s waist. With a practiced tap of Nick’s thumb, the Siamese twins moved their four legs in time towards the Versa’s door directly behind mine. Nick reached out and opened the door and, with practiced synchronization, crawled, spider-like, comfortably in the middle of the backseat, reaching for the middle seat belt buckle. I heard the click of their seat belt slotting into place and turned the key into the ignition.

We pulled out of the grassy carnival parking lot and, cautiously pausing for a moment to look either way to make sure there were no cars we had to stall for, turned right onto the main road.

“So where are we going again? I’m sorry,” I called back, looking at them through the rearview mirror. Both made eye contact with me through the mirror, their dumb eyes cut in cynicism. I could tell that their lips probably curled upward in smirks.

“Hollywood,” Kita called back, with an amused grunt.

I didn’t say anything.

“We’re going to the Salem gift shop,” both said, not quite at the same time. “We want to get a momento for our mom. Her birthday’s tomorrow,” Nick finished. I glanced in the rearview mirror at them; Nick was raising his eyebrows at Kita, who was raising her eyebrows back in a shared dialogue of “us against this other.” Either way, I wanted to be cordial. If I was going to spend however long I was planning to spend at the carnival, around these two, I at least would try to build friendly terms with them.

“So, Tumberlina found me around three weeks ago.” I spied the twins making eyes at each other again and grimacing. “I was waiting on my mom in the changing rooms at one of the stores and she was over there waiting on her husband. I had never seen a ‘little person’ before and she caught me staring at her. She saw my skin and started talking to me, about how she managed the sideshow portion of the carnival, and I told her how I was working on my GED -”

“GED?” Nick asked, cavalier.

“Yeah,” I replied calmly at his interjection, “I was in public school but I got really sick and was in and out of the hospital for a few years. It was too much hassle so I had to just do homeschooling.” I smiled nostalgically. “I used to be really popular.”

“Yeah, I’m sure,” Nick glowered.

“Yeah,” Kita quipped, scoffing.

I took a deep, intent inhale and forced a smile.

“Anyway, Tumberlina and I kept in contact, and I wanted to travel, so here I am. She did warn that I’d be the only one of us who was able to drive, too.” I let out an amused groan. “It’s worth it, though. I like it here.”

Silence.

“So what’s your story?” You’re both douchebags!, I wanted to telepathically yell to them.

Another shared glace of condescension. “We both started as fraternal twins, but our eggs fused somehow and - here we are.” Nick’s voice was annoyed, clipped. I gave up.

I turned off the air conditioner and rolled down the window. The sky wasn’t as bright today as it had been for the past week. There were more clouds in the sky, completely covering the sun, turning the sky a bland shade of teal.

Loudly enough so that I could hear, though not directed towards me, Kita started to muse sardonically with Nick.

“Remember when we walked into Gram’s trailer that one time to hand her her paycheck?”

“Yeah,” Nick scoffed. “It smelled so bad. She smells like poop all the time.”

“Those poor guys who have to lift her out of her trailer and roll her onto the sideshow stage.”

“And Spring has to give her a bath every day!”

Kita laughed loudly, “She tells us that she’s a virgin.”

“Who is she kidding!?”

“She’s disgusting. I don’t want to touch her.”

“And Russ. He’s just... weird.”

“Yeah... weird. All those tattoos and those gross holes in his body. He’s a loser.”

I finally spoke up. “You know, I heard that Russ just signed a deal with a major TV company. He told me to keep which one between me and him but, yeah, he’s going to be hosting his own reality series.” It was a lie, but I was done listening to these two. “He’s going to be making bank. I’m really  happy for him. He’s worked really hard.”

“Oh.” The twins lost their steam. They became quiet. I peeked another glance at them through the rearview mirror. Both, turned inward towards each other, stared at the ground, mouths slightly agape, their breathing shallow and contemplative.

We drove in silence towards downtown, where gray, towering government buildings stood alongside a myriad of little trinket shops for the tourists. As I got nearer, I could hear the faint rumble of a crowd. As I took a left turn onto the main road, keeping a safe distance from the rest of the cars around me, I saw a large crowd ahead of me, to my left, standing in front of what I figured was City Hall. Ahead of us, directly next to the sidewalk the crowd was protesting on, the stop light hanging above flashed yellow, then red. I slowed down, the first car below the stop light.

I turned to my left to look at the crowd, my arm casually rested out of the window. The crowd was well-sized, about a hundred people, and was mostly made up of older folk in frumpy t-shirts, flip flops and sunglasses. Their expressions were stony, were yelling all kinds of different things, and they held up signs that were printed with slogans. I saw a few that said things like:

LOST MY JOB, FOUND AN OCCUPATION

DEAR 1% - IGNORE ME, GO SHOPPING

NO BULLS,  NO BEARS, ONLY PIGS

I heard Nick’s paltry voice bleet, “What’s this crap about?” Kita scoffed.

Before any of us could figure out what exactly was going on, a quick succession suddenly broke through the unchoreographed chanting, POP-POP-POP-POP-POP-POP. We all jumped, startled. The crowd broke into a frenzy. Many immediately dropped to the ground, like an invisible weight had suddenly pushed them down. Their signs tipped and fell like fans. The car behind me started blaring its horn. I looked back at them, rudely, because, out of my periphery, I could tell that the stop light was still on red.

I glanced at the twins. Nick was swaying. His head was back to being bowed slightly downward. His blinking eyes looked glassy and his mouth was opening and closing like a fish. Kita’s head was bowed, also, but she wasn’t moving. The left side of her black hair, pulled back in a slick ponytail, glowed wetly. I saw a trickle of blood crawl over and down her sharp cheekbone.

A barrage of protesters flooded past my car, some even crawling over the hood, while a couple even jumped over the roof. I could hear the sporadic thump of their hands and feet landing on the roof above me. In between ducking in my seat and peeking out the open driver’s side window, I caught the image of a portly man, clad in a black long sleeve, black slacks and black romper boots, being pinned to the sidewalk below the steps of City Hall by four average looking men. They were all screaming. Everyone was screaming, except for Nick.

Epilogue

Russ, the Human Geek, was eventually noticed by the Discovery channel, and was featured in one of their late-night prime-time specials, a year later, titled Ultimate Freaks. He eventually married and, with his wife, adopted one child.

Spring, the Rubber Girl, was found in her bed, overdosed on sleeping pills. Her mother spent the last of her savings on a modest funeral and casket to bury her daughter in. She is buried in Sunset Cemetery in Manhattan, KS.

Gram, the Bearded Fat Lady, passed away exactly one year after her daughter was buried. Due to lack of funds, Gram’s body was cremated. Tumberlina, the sideshow manager, purchased an urn, welded it shut, and placed it among the many knick knacks which decorated the tunnel entryway towards the sideshow performance stage.

After eleven years of intensive psychological and emotional therapy to assuage the trauma brought on by the death and detachment of his sister, Nick, well-dressed and skin glowing indicative of a well-fed diet, walked out of his clinic, papers, which were glaringly stamped CURED, clutched in hand. He walked into the nearest high-rise apartment building he could find, climbed the stairs to the roof, and promptly jumped off.

Friday’s debut carnival opening was cancelled in light of Thursday’s domestic terrorist attack, for which Eric was thankful. He passed on the news to Brian the night after, apologized and promised that, instead, “she” was saving up to visit him in Tampa. When he finally did save enough to buy a plane ticket to Tampa Eric, instead, used the money to cut his tongue in half and purchase a custom-made green, spiked crown to wear during performances. It took him three months to fully learn how to manipulate the two halves of his tongue independently.

Reviews

[Lola Nation]

Freaks! Fun piece. Best fan fiction yet.

[Dab]

I enjoyed the piece. It is well written. The characters were interesting to say the least. Way to create the strange and Gothic! The description of the characters is excellent although I found the story itself overly descriptive. The use of text messaging was good. Unlike, Katie I was not confused at all who Eric or Erika is. It was obvious from the first text message that Erika was just Eric trying to be someone else on the internet. Having a disorder as debilitating as Eric's must be difficult and cause self-esteem problems. For Eric, the internet gave him a way to express himself affectionately to another person without that person understanding that he is a freak in a freak show. This gives him comfort in someway. I do not understand why Eric wanted to be a girl, "Erika," though. That point is not explained. Saying that, I think the story's "plot," as there wasn't any other, the meeting between Eric and Brian his internet friend, was unexpectedly cut off and thus the story has no plot. It wasn't a "twist" but a severing. In my opinion the random shooting and ending of the story left me wanting more and not in a good way. I would have much rather seen the lizard meet Brian from Tampa by the side stage tent. It would have been extra cool if "Brian" was some made up internet persona too. You have talent! Give us more!

[Katie]

Wow, what a story! MUCH the opposite of the other piece I reviewed. This is great...although there were little typos here and there. I'm also a little bit confused as to who Eric is...is he the main character? I'm assuming, but I missed his name being mentioned in the actual story? You had me believing the main character's Ericka was actually the piercer for Russ and then that is was Spring...it was a mystery until at the end I realized it was no one he actually knew...In my mind I was really hoping it was going to be Spring and that that was the big secret and you'd develop from there! Way to go for a plot twist and an abrupt ending though. Thanks for sharing! This was fun to read! You're descriptions were great too.