Meat Market Blues (A Short)

Kinda stuck...can't get past 1,000 words lately

About that time she looked up from her rapidly disappearing sloe gin fiz and noticed the apes holding court by the jukebox.  Their hairy knuckles swept the spinters from their boots; red-assed babboon women in hip-hugging blue-jean splender groomed them occassionally.  Bottles appeared, emptied and were replaced in hurried succession by scuttling bunnies in tight fitting black uniforms and high stacked hare-sprayed, feathered bouffants.  She looked away again and concentrated on her drink.

 

She mused that she was once again apart of this menagerie, this meat market of myopic madness, and grew maudlin.

 

She decided to never think in a succession of M's ever, ever again.

 

She wondered if the ex-alpha male was enduring a similar shock.

 

She looked up from her empty glass to find an empty room.  There were stains here and there proving the area had once been occupied but she could not discern how long ago or by whom - she was no forensic specialist!  No matter how much CSI she and the ex-alpha had enjoyed over the course of their pairing.  A wind swept through the ancient split wood walls and chilled her sense of desirability, whipping around the eaves of her sex and whistling sweet nothings about her nothingness. 

 

She wished the big-hair bunnies would return so she could order a whiskey sour.

Reviews

[cyanskye]

I have read this through several times and I like it more each time. The description of the bar patrons was very clever and you injected just enough humor to maintain a bite. Allow me to pay for your whiskey sour, but honey, you have got to go to a classier place next time - lol!

[Lia]

Really great piece. I agree with both writers below lol You give so much to the scene and situtaion. Really fanatastic write. Thanks for sharing xx

[Becca]

I agree with Yin down there.. this is a kick a** story! Woman ! I do believe I like your style. Have read several of your writings and always sit here in awe of the layers and layers you build into your work. At least that's what I sense.
V5C- 5 star!

[yinseriv]

Why would you want to go past 1000 words when you serve up a gem like this? I am at a loss to pick a favorite line because every word belongs as is. The story sets the scene. Your progression leads me darkly to sit as a ghost beside you. I feel a hollow laugh building inside me as I read the ending.