You Are Rain

She sits by her window quiet and still,

Listening as the rain falls outside hitting the pavement and trees,

To the rush of water as a car drives around the corner pushing the rain aside,

She watches as the rain stops and is replaced by the sun ,

And the leaves drip water as if to cry and the light makes every drop shine like crystals,

She cries as she relates the rain to herself, speaking aloud

Saddening, predictable, disliked, dark

He hears and comes to her side, smile on his face

Wiping her tears he relates the rain to her, speaking aloud

Calming, dependable, needed, beautiful, loved

 

Reviews

[Greg Close]

I enjoyed this. It was a nice break from steady rhthym and rhyme scheme. You have lots of good descriptive and evocative phrases to give the piece depth. I'm not sure exactly why, but this is my favorite:"wiping her tears he relates the rain to her..." Nice alliteration! I have to say that "relating" is a really interesting word choice, and I mean interesting in a good way! ;) I like the mystery of who "he" is, and I'm wondering if it's spiritual in nature. For me, it'd be my dog "Calming, dependable, needed, beautiful, loved" but he doesn't speak aloud much (that I can understand). Thanks for a good read!

[Austin Smith]

This is something that honestly made me think. First the rain is described as sad, then it is described as beautiful. It really plays on ones perception, as both sides are used to create this situation. This was penned well. Well done, Luna.