You Lost Me

You Lost Me

A Poem by Sophie
"

inspired by Christina Aguilera's You Lost Me

"

Wandering alone amongst the trees

the branches drooping, rotting,

the color scheme consisting of black and dark green

my wounds drip blood, just clotting.


I sit on the earth,

and a puff of dust clouds

in this place, death, and the absence of mirth,

Miseries crowd.


I can't breath,

They're choking me.

My sobs rip from my throat,

I'm lost, all alone here, in this forest remote


I'm reminded of their warnings,

they said to tell you goodbye,

now, I won't see morning,

you've left me here to die.


My hair, once beautifully done,

is now scraggly and tangled.

My dress had begun

as perfect, now it is mangled.


My make up stains my face

but so does mud,

I will survive this place,

I will spill your blood.


Don't beg for me back,

after you sent me there,

I'm not going to give you anymore slack,

depression is not a fun affair.

© 2012 Sophie


Author's Note

Sophie
reviews please!
and if you haven't, please just read PLEASE! it's not even a sentence, long, and it'll take a second of your time, and will reward you with 3 reviews :D

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Featured Review

The description was direct and painful. I like the visions create by powerful statements.
"Don't beg for me back,
after you sent me there,
I'm not going to give you anymore slack,
depression is not a fun affair."
Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote


Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This had me wondering quite a few things, tickles my brain.
It also made me thing of "The Hunger games", life in the arena
Nice work

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The description was direct and painful. I like the visions create by powerful statements.
"Don't beg for me back,
after you sent me there,
I'm not going to give you anymore slack,
depression is not a fun affair."
Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote


Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great job! Very well written! Exceptional!

Posted 12 Years Ago


I enjoyed the strength that came across in this piece, it was like it was me sitting there sobbing. Really it was the strength and imagery that did that. This was a good poem. It all seems to be building up to that last line and it came through nicely there.

Posted 12 Years Ago


this is soo good i love all the imagry. especially like the lines:
I'm reminded of their warnings,
they said to tell you goodbye,
now, I won't see morning,
you've left me here to die.
really great poem, keep writing sweetie !

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sophie

12 Years Ago

Those are my favorite lines too!
depression is not a fun affair indeed. you have matured in poetry these days,you get to your points nicely.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I can't resist, one small typo:

I can't breath,
They're choking me.

Breath should be Breathe with an E. Breath is someones breath, breathe is to yknow, breathe haha.

Really nice poem Sophie. I'm always surprised to read your poems and see how good they are, I don't think I was writing that well when I was 14.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great imagery and relation of the changes. This poem was just really nicely written. Great job Sophie. (sorry, couldn't really think of a novelish review, this is just really nice)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hi Sophie,
Your imagery is very strong, dark and emotional. I agree with Marble Mountain in regards to the fifth stanza, last line, but overall, a well crafted poem.
Regards
Shawlyn

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very well worded; the flow is perfect. I love the imagery you are able to portray here. Nice.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on June 28, 2012
Last Updated on June 28, 2012

Author

Sophie
Sophie

-, MA



About
I'm 16 in my sophomore year of high school, I started on this site when i was 14, took about a year break and now i might be back, im just fixing my description because i was annoying as f**k last yea.. more..

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A Poem by Sophie



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