Eyes

"We should love, not fall in love, because everything that falls gets broken." -Taylor Swift

Eyes of secrets

bones of sorrow

mind with only the hope

of a better tomorrow.

Skin metaphorically bruised and blackened

and a heart made of melted steel

nerve endings only wish

they couldn't feel.

The heart with liquid fire in her veins

merely wishes she could take the reigns

The mind is too boring and slow,

the heart just wants all the secrets to be exposed.

But the bones tell her no,

they are wiser, hardened without being sore

while the heart was originally made of hardened steel,

her decisions have made her into liquid, soft from the score.

It's her dreams, her hopes that have made her suffer

if she hadn't tried, she would never have gone under.

The mind told her better to walk than drown,

but the heart, excited, couldn't hear anyhow.

Now hearing this tale

of what your body is doing to itself,

don't you wish the heart would shut up

and listen to the brain, who is not corrupt?

Well, don't, she is only following what the eyes have shown her,

it's all their fault.

Maybe if they hadn't seen him,

all heart, brain, and bone

wouldn't be broken and shattered on the asphalt below.

Taken there by feet and legs,

who's secrets were too great in charge,

and the fire that ran through them told them dreams were too large

The brain tried to stop them,

but the heart had won,

but it's all the eyes' fault

for falling in love.

Author's Note

reviews please!

Reviews

[AleyshaRosa]

The heart with liquid fire in her veins
merely wishes she could take the reigns
The mind is too boring and slow,
the heart just wants all the secrets to be exposed.
But the bones tell her no,
they are wiser, hardened without being sore
while the heart was originally made of hardened steel,
her decisions have made her into liquid, soft from the score.
It's her dreams, her hopes that have made her suffer
if she hadn't tried, she would never have gone under.
The mind told her better to walk than drown,
but the heart, excited, couldn't hear anyhow.

This was my favourite stanza, but not by much. It was the most honest definition of falling in love I've read. Especially, "in her dreams, her hopes made her suffer/ if she hadn't tried, she would never have gone under."
Love could not be any truer.
Koodoos

[Sophie]

thanks :D

[Patch Silver]

I love the battle of logic over emotion. Well Done!

[Quiet Child]

this is amazingly written, you're very talented!(: i really enjoyed it.

[Coyote Poetry]

This is amazing poetry. The eyes lead to all places. The strong description brought me into the poem.
"The mind told her better to walk than drown,
but the heart, excited, couldn't hear anyhow."
The heart is the strongest organ. Can lead us to good places and bad. Thank you for the excellent poem.
Coyote

[ScorpioSun]

I liked the sense of inevitability, the struggle doomed to fail. It's a struggle we all lose to the heart at least once in a lifetime. Plus "bones of sorrow" is an awesome line!

[A.C. Davis]

Oh Man, Sofie. It's been so long since I've read some of your work D: and this reminded me of just how good you are! I tried to put 500/100 to make it up, but it wouldn't let me. Just know you're a great writer who is really in touch with her core of emotion. Awesome stuff.

[Ragin Cajun]

Awesome job.....I loved it.

[Tamia123]

I can only use one word to describe this poem: Amazing. Great job!!!!

[Pratik]

An elaborate poem that builds on a simple idea.. a tussle between the heart and brain and pathos of love.. The metaphors are well utilized... the topic may be a bit cliche, but your writing elevated this to a different level altogether... Nice effort :)

[Damien Davison]

"It's her dreams, her hopes that have made her suffer
if she hadn't tried, she would never have gone under."

Switch the hers for he's and I feel this way often... Very nice write.