Reasons I am Alone

I was checking my mail

When a handful of wedding invitations

Fell from insides, they stared at me

For hours on my kitchen table

Telling me how much my life sucks

That I’m sitting at my kitchen table

Eating by candle light a romantic dinner for one

Stepping into the bubbles

Rinse away my lonely day

It has been four years seven months and 27 days

Since the last time I held the title of boyfriend

And the only reason I know this

Is because he broke up with on New Year’s Day

Trust me, I know by heart

All the reasons I am alone

 

1.

I was sick the day class covered dating

Or I knew I was gay and the lesson was

Tailored to straight couples; either way

I have absolutely no idea when someone

Is flirting with me or how to tell if a guy

Wants me to press my lips against theirs

 

2.

I can listen to the Next to Normal soundtrack

Over and over and over and over and over

Sympathizing with Diane’s insanity

 

3.

I get drunk off my mother’s homemade wine

Dance in the kitchen to Tightrope by Janelle Monae

And when I sing sometimes I’m high

But most of the time I’m low

 

4.

I can play games like Bloon Tower Defense 4

Or Gemcraft for hours and be content with life

 

5.

I sit alone in my room and sing Judas

By Lady Gaga at the top of my lungs

Then laugh uncontrollably at myself

I roll on the floor convinced

I am the funniest person in the world

 

6.

Because I have standards

It is a basic law of communication

That two people must be

Physically attracted to one another

In order for the relationship to work

No, you do not have to be perfect

For me to go on a date with you

But you must be pleasant looking

 

7.

I refuse to be a relationship

Simply because everyone around me

Is starting their own family

I do not need a date to your wedding

When I RSVP for one

It is not because I am sad and alone

It is because I am alone and

Confident enough to spend time by myself

 

So whether I meet him tomorrow

Or in five more years; the next person

I get into a relationship with

Will eventually invite all of you

To our wedding

Reviews

[Mazie Tackett]

interesting

[Androglossia]

Because I have standards
It is a basic law of communication
That two people must be
Physically attracted to one another
In order for the relationship to work
No, you do not have to be perfect
For me to go on a date with you
But you must be pleasant looking

I love this part. I'm a lesbian and just because we're gay doesn't mean we don't have standards and will just take anyone who comes along and suck them all up just to have someone to be with and not be alone. I'm gay, I'm not coward. And it's still nice to look at a pretty face when making love or a nice bod, isn't it? Or maybe it's just me:)

[Cole Hayley]

Ballon tower defense is a addicting game hahaha, a great read, very entertaining. You are very talented! You mix a perfect blend of seriousness and comedic references. Great job as always

[afra]

amazing ...you are a amazing writer i always enjoy your work....keep it up

[Lost in Wonderland]

Wow, I loved it! So well written with touches of humor scattered in there. I loved reason 5!!! (honestly I think that would be a reason not to be alone:) and number 7 was very strong. This is my favorite piece of yours I think, awesome job!
God bless:)

[Serenity Faith]

I LOVED this! You reminded me so much of my closest guy friend(next to my husband of course) in the world. So I for sure, will have to show this to him later. He's always asking me on advice about the guys he likes, cause he's so unsure of the other person's feelings and himself as well. This made me smile more than anything. You are truly clever and talented. Present a fella with your works and I'm sure you'll win him over easily ^_~