better than this

seventh in a series

If I disappear, have no fear
I’ll be here, I’ll be there

Neither the focus of
Either/Or and their friends

A move set in motion
the cause of a running away

So the last thing you know
Is what you realize you’ve already done

touch me again… touch me

Stand on the sidewalk
causation stopped, its blood lined in chalk

But I am a broken car
still swimming alone in the street

A ship of realities, weighs anchor
shivering in causality, steps in the cold

Friends and family are gathering,
secretly wishing I’d give up already

leave me behind… leave me

Did you miss me…?
even though
I wasn’t missing

Faults we found (none of yours)
with anger and with pain

So we fixed you with saviors
but nobody can save you now

The entire world is through with itself

Please… please…
Just let me know where you’ve been

(I’m sure there’s someone who knows)

“You’re better than this,” I said to the man with the gun

“Yeah, I know, but I’m not better than the man I should be”

"Why are you afraid?" they asked me

"I'm not afraid--I'm just worried about getting it right"

shoot me again… shoot me

How did you die...?

even though

You were already dead

...

If I reappear, it is clear
that things, they have changed

but I’m still the same

(passing through a phase)

Author's Note

This is the seventh in a series of poems that are inspired by the album "The Devil And God Are Raging Inside Me", by Brand New. It is one of my favorites, and it has a lot of personal worth to me. That album has helped me get through so much. These obviously pale in comparison, but they are meant as just a way to express myself and to be inspired by the music. I hope you all adore them!

<3 <3 Love, Sofia Guerra