E and T

When I was in high school I had this writing teacher, Mrs. Moore and one of the best things she ever told me was, “when you have writers block don’t think about what you want to write, just start to write all the random things that come to mind.” Right now what comes to mind is the same thing that is always on my mind, strangling me by day, making it hard to breathe; the same ideas that tortures me with sleepless nights of exhaust. Eddie but, it is also so much more than just the thought of his eyes or the thought of her lips pressed against him; that hurt me. No it is how the story of E and T ended; it was how everything unfolded, the way I started to see Eddies true colors shine through everything he was trying to repress. I guess everything hurts right now but what hurts the most is he wasn’t the person I thought he was, no, the guy I fall in love with; my blue sweater kid, was long dead before our book was slammed shut. I don’t expect you to understand my reasons behind writing this for, I myself, do not fully understand the purpose of this, maybe I am trying to write our story in hope that he will come rushing back to my warm arms like a played out movie, or maybe I am just trying to write about who I am and share my story with everyone, and it would be hard to understand the person behind this pen, without understanding her first true love for, it is the first love that changes your life forever. I loved him more then I will ever be able to express, for love is felt by the heart and there no words beautiful enough to describe my love for Eddie. Your mind cannot began to fathom the way my heart beat for him, he was my love. Love, a four letter word that is often said to fast, and tends to have little to no meaning, but when I or when Eddie said this word to each other we meant it, with every last drop of emotion that we had tied into hearts. At one point in our lives we were in love. A love that we described as a bright light of joy that light up the dark world, what happened to this love I cannot say, maybe we were just not meant to have a forever, maybe I was not enough for him but my favorite theory is our love was to great that god himself had to end it because the sun was jealous; that the love between two teenaged kids could sine brighter then it. So I invite my audience, my readers whether a stranger, close friend or family member, I invite you into my story of a tragic lost love, in hope that my words can touch the hearts and souls of whomever my book may find,  in a way that makes you can fell connected to world around you.